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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Well, it's come to this: I either enter an intensive outpatient psychiatric program for 2-4 weeks (3-4 times per week, 3 hour sessions ... sort of a group therapy), or my therapist is recommending hospitalization. Never been hospitalized, and while the thought scares me, much of me thinks it would be a relief...something to protect me from myself.
On the other hand, the outpatient program would, perhaps, also be a good thing, hopefully helping me to function at a higher level than I am right now. I was wondering if any of you have been through such a program and, if so, what your thoughts are on intensive outpatient treatment?
What I do know is that I felt a sense of relief when my therapist stepped into action on Saturday and took control of the situation. I feel like I have lost control of my life despite my efforts to take it back so it's nice to have someone I trust make some important decisions for me.
Penny
Posted by mair on June 3, 2002, at 10:51:38
In reply to Intensive outpatient program, posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Penny
I'm really glad this is happening, since clearly you've been feeling so awful.
I have no experience with this kind of program and will be interested to read the comments of others. I do know that while I've never been hospitalized before, there was a period a little over a year ago when my therapist was talking about it quite alot. My initial reaction was to dismiss the suggestion out of hand, but once I got over the shock of considering this as a real possibility, the idea of me not having to be responsible for me, got to be very alluring.
Good Luck
Mair
Posted by judy1 on June 3, 2002, at 18:48:39
In reply to Intensive outpatient program, posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Hi Penny,
I've been in an out-patient program twice, each coming on the end of an in-patient stay. They were 8-5, M-F programs- but because of my son's school schedule I would arrive around 9 and leave at 2 or so. Personally, I think a program like this is MUCH better than being in-patient, you feel as if you have some control over your life rather then being locked up in a ward (even in a voluntary commitment). Your day will be very structured with group therapy making up the biggest part, I think I only saw my psychiatrist about 45 minutes out of the total day (sometimes less). I had a great deal of difficulty being part of a group, I was terrified. I think this is unusual though (and is probably a symptom of my PTSD). The group and leader do tend to be kinder to the 'newbies', they won't force you to talk if you don't feel up to it. I think you would probably benefit from such a structured setting, and wish you the best- Judy
Posted by bookgurl99 on June 4, 2002, at 1:19:56
In reply to Intensive outpatient program, posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Penny,
I believe that you should trust your intuition on this.
BUT -- please consider doing outpatient therapy. My own therapist convinced me against hospitalization for a 'nervous breakdown' by telling me that there is _no_ evidence that people heal faster in the hospital. She also painted a bleak picture of a boring stay with little recreation than a small 'day room' with one tv.
Unless you are dangerous to yourself or others, the best way to heal from mental illness -- in general -- is to do normalizing activities and participate in life. Participating in an outpatient program will let you hang on to your 'normalcy' while (hopefully) getting the help you need.
bookgurl99
Posted by Bookgurl99 on June 10, 2002, at 8:40:45
In reply to Intensive outpatient program, posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Posted by Penny on June 10, 2002, at 12:14:44
In reply to Penny, what did you decide on? (nm), posted by Bookgurl99 on June 10, 2002, at 8:40:45
Waiting to hear back from the IOP program. I went for an evaluation, but they said there's a one to two week waiting period before getting in the program, and it's the only one in my county. I don't understand what they expect you to do until then.
However, I have taken all my meds to my pdoc's office and now I go by there every day to get them dispensed to me. That way the temptation to OD is lessened...I guess it's a good thing.
thanks for asking.
Penny
Posted by Bookgurl99 on June 11, 2002, at 17:17:43
In reply to Re: Penny, what did you decide on? » Bookgurl99, posted by Penny on June 10, 2002, at 12:14:44
> Waiting to hear back from the IOP program. I went for an evaluation, but they said there's a one to two week waiting period before getting in the program
So they're having you stay out of the hospital while they decide if you're well enough to be treated out of the hospital? LOL. Sounds like government to me. . .
.. . but I'm glad you set up your med situation. I've had moments in my life where I gave all of my med-type stuff to friends/roommates so that I wouldn't be tempted.
It's really evidence of your desire to be well. . .:D
Posted by mair on June 12, 2002, at 21:43:43
In reply to Re: Penny, what did you decide on? » Bookgurl99, posted by Penny on June 10, 2002, at 12:14:44
Penny
I think your meds arrangement is a very good thing. Sometimes I think that suicidal impulses are just that - very impulsive. You'd like to think if you made the most momentous decision of your life, it wouldn't be an impulsive decision.
Mair
Posted by Penny on June 13, 2002, at 11:37:07
In reply to Re: Penny, what did you decide on? » Penny, posted by mair on June 12, 2002, at 21:43:43
Well, pigs must be flying b/c the people at the intensive outpatient program FINALLY called me back (after getting my therapist and pdoc to call them to get me some kind of definite answer re: the program).
I'm starting the IOP program tomorrow, and it can't come soon enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind and, although going to my pdoc's office everyday for meds gives me someone to check in with, it's just not enough. I'm a little nervous about it, but I also feel a sense of relief. I'm just hoping that this will work and afraid that it won't.
I still feel overwhelmed and very very sad and anxious. Pdoc's playing with meds some more and I think he's concerned that it's taking so long to get things situated. I know I am. Not sure how much longer I can exist in this state of mind.
Thanks to all of you for the support.
Penny
Posted by bookgurl99 on June 13, 2002, at 13:32:46
In reply to starting IOP tomorrow, posted by Penny on June 13, 2002, at 11:37:07
Posted by Dinah on June 13, 2002, at 16:58:35
In reply to starting IOP tomorrow, posted by Penny on June 13, 2002, at 11:37:07
Your therapist and pdoc did a good job in getting them to move so fast. I hope it all goes well.
Dinah
Posted by mair on June 13, 2002, at 17:04:46
In reply to That's terrific, Penny!, posted by Dinah on June 13, 2002, at 16:58:35
Penny
Everything you've described tells me that you've been very proactive about addressing your current medical condition and that you have a pdoc and therapist willing to meet you partway and advocate on your behalf. I think you should feel very good about this.
Please let us know how things are going.
Mair
Posted by wendy b. on June 13, 2002, at 22:42:17
In reply to starting IOP tomorrow, posted by Penny on June 13, 2002, at 11:37:07
> Well, pigs must be flying b/c the people at the intensive outpatient program FINALLY called me back (after getting my therapist and pdoc to call them to get me some kind of definite answer re: the program).
>
> I'm starting the IOP program tomorrow, and it can't come soon enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind and, although going to my pdoc's office everyday for meds gives me someone to check in with, it's just not enough. I'm a little nervous about it, but I also feel a sense of relief. I'm just hoping that this will work and afraid that it won't.
>
> I still feel overwhelmed and very very sad and anxious. Pdoc's playing with meds some more and I think he's concerned that it's taking so long to get things situated. I know I am. Not sure how much longer I can exist in this state of mind.
>
> Thanks to all of you for the support.
>
> Penny
Penny,I wish you the very best - I have been reading your posts, and am thinking about you, as I'm sure are many others...
Please be well, and post as often as you can. I'm sure everything will go well, and as the others said, you have a good team right there at your side. You sound like you're ready for it, & I'm glad you didn't have to wait any longer.
A very warm, encouraging hug, we will be thinking of you,
Wendy
Posted by Penny on June 18, 2002, at 16:20:38
In reply to Intensive outpatient program, posted by Penny on June 3, 2002, at 9:47:21
Well, I started the program. Kinda interesting, though as you all can probably imagine, we're not exactly a fun-loving group of individuals! The program consists of group therapy for about an hour and a half and then a planning session where we plan for our week, weekend, whatever the case may be. I like the therapist who runs the group as she reminds me of my other therapist. Both are New Yorkers of Italian descent and both 'tell it like it is,' which I think is good.
I asked the group therapist how long I'd be doing this, and she said probably, judging from how I sounded in group yesterday, for the full four weeks. I think it will take me even longer, considering how deeply ingrained my emotional problems are. I think some folks have been in there longer than the 'usual' 2-4 weeks. So, we'll see.
On another note, I have a second interview next Wednesday for the job in Chapel Hill. Part of me hopes I get it, and part is terrified b/c it would mean leaving my therapist. Not that that wouldn't happen eventually anyway, but it really stresses me out. She told me to not think about it right now as we can deal with that when it comes time, but it's hard not to. The thought of leaving her...I just don't know.
And the suicidal thoughts are ever present. My pdoc is concerned that it is taking so long for the meds to give me some relief and even pointed out that they can only do so much with the stress I'm under. I suppose he's right. I'm just ready for my job to be over (2 weeks) so I can de-stress somewhat. Of course, that brings on more financial issues....
Thanks to all of you for your kind words. I appreciate it!
Penny
Posted by bookgurl99 on June 19, 2002, at 1:56:44
In reply to IOP..., posted by Penny on June 18, 2002, at 16:20:38
Hey Penny, good luck with everything.
Yes, it would be strange if you got a great job _but_ had to leave the therapist. You must feel a bit like a chickadee forced from the nest right now. . .
but those chickadees find out they can fly on their own, no?
I hope IOP brings some of the relief you need. In the meantime, are you doing anything _else_ for yourself besides therapy? drawing in crayon? good sex? exercise? reading a great book? looking at the stars at night? don't forget about the _life_ part of it all!
bookgurl99
Posted by Penny on June 19, 2002, at 7:19:11
In reply to thinking about you. . . » Penny, posted by bookgurl99 on June 19, 2002, at 1:56:44
Bookgurl,
Thanks for your message.
Yeah, I started painting. Acrylics on canvas. Never done that before...and the first one was very very dark. And I had some of my digital art pieces printed, which is cool. Still feeling down though. I think a large part of it is the job, but that will be ending soon, so...
At least I know what my agenda is for group today (we have to set agendas that we want to discuss at the beginning of the session). I want to discuss how to say no to people without making yourself feel guilty. I have the worst time with that, and I feel it's a large part of my problem. I don't know how to say no and I don't know how to get angry with people without feeling extremely bad and down on myself.
But back to your message...good book, yes. I'm re-reading Harry Potter. Good sex? LOL. You obviously missed my post a long time ago stating that I don't date. Not to mention that all the meds have completely killed my libido. Ah well...
Thanks again.
Penny
Posted by Bookgurl99 on June 24, 2002, at 14:19:18
In reply to Re: thinking about you. . . » bookgurl99, posted by Penny on June 19, 2002, at 7:19:11
This is the end of the thread.
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