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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by NVDeb on July 25, 2004, at 1:18:17
So I have a session on Thursday (session #15 with the current therapist) and I'm about to spill the beans. I plan to tell her that I love her (not romantically, just pure unconditional love) and that I'm not particularly crazy about myself and about all the therapists I've gone to and all the people that should have done something but didn't.
It might be a huge mistake but I've decided to do it (I'll be reading aloud from a piece of paper, I have 8 single-spaced pages already) and towards the end I plan to play Madonna's "This Used to be My Playground" and bawl my eyes out in front of someone for the first time since I was 11 years old (I'm now 26).
The worst thing that may happen? That this will be the biggest mistake of my life. The best thing that may happen? That this may be the best thing I've done with my life yet. I'm willing to risk it. I still don't know what I did to deserve someone as wonderful as my current therapist. She'll be the first person I EVER (ever!) tell that I love (I've repeated it back out of obligation but I've never initiated it to ANYone).
My last therapist used to yawn and clean her nails during therapy. This is the first person I think in my whole life that actually listens to me. When I realized that she was actually listening to what I was saying I said to myself "Holy crap, this one's actually listening!" Great but scary at the same time.
Sooooo..... 4 more days until I share my feelings with another human being.
Posted by Raindancer on July 25, 2004, at 10:42:16
In reply to I'm about to disclose my feelings on Thursday., posted by NVDeb on July 25, 2004, at 1:18:17
When I read your post I was moved beyond expression. I think this is a wonderful thing that you are planning to do and I think it could make a huge difference to your life in the future. The words "I'm willing to risk it," say it all - you have grown to a point that now says very clearly "This is me" and I'm pretty sure your T will feel privileged to be there with you and to accept your love, which is the greatest gift we can give to someone else.
Should she not be able to handle it (and I don't think this will happen) this will not be your problem but hers. All the very best for Thursday and for your future. You deserve it.
Raindancer
P.S. Your former T sounds like everything a T shouldn't be. She lets down her profession and herself.
Posted by Susan47 on July 25, 2004, at 11:25:59
In reply to Re: I'm about to disclose my feelings on Thursday. » NVDeb, posted by Raindancer on July 25, 2004, at 10:42:16
NVDeb,
Please keep in touch and let us know how it goes; we care!
Posted by gardenergirl on July 25, 2004, at 15:28:35
In reply to Re: I'm about to disclose my feelings on Thursday., posted by Susan47 on July 25, 2004, at 11:25:59
Wow, what a big step. You are being very brave, and I'm so impressed. Good luck to you, and as others said, please let us know how you are doing and how it goes.
Take care,
gg
Posted by shortelise on July 26, 2004, at 1:34:59
In reply to I'm about to disclose my feelings on Thursday., posted by NVDeb on July 25, 2004, at 1:18:17
That's great, and I admire you enormously! I bet it's a huge step in a good direction for you.
Keep us posted.
Shorte
Posted by TofuEmmy on July 27, 2004, at 12:20:38
In reply to Re: I'm about to disclose my feelings on Thursday. » NVDeb, posted by Raindancer on July 25, 2004, at 10:42:16
I think this is a bold and wonderful thing to do. To own your feelings and to open your heart is incredibly brave. A good therapist will happy to hold those feelings safely. They need to be out in the open, and to be discussed.
Good for you!
Emmy
This is the end of the thread.
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