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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 29. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by shortelise on September 25, 2004, at 13:42:30
I dreamt we were in a car, he offers me a cigarette. I feel shocked to see him smoking, say I didn't think he smoked (he's big into health, natural food, etc.). He gives me a look that says, don't ask. I take a cigarette, then another, embarrassed realize I have two (because I am flustered) and put one back.
Ok, Freudians, whaddya think of that?
Oh, lordy lordy, I am going to have to tell him this one .... :-(
ShortE
Posted by crushedout on September 26, 2004, at 16:26:14
In reply to Dream about T, posted by shortelise on September 25, 2004, at 13:42:30
shorte,i have no idea what to say about it analysis-wise (ok, there's the whole "sometimes a cigar[ette] is just a cigar[ette]" thing to keep in mind) but that's a hilarious dream. i definitely think you should tell him. i think i would feel pretty embarrassed but i bet he will think it's funny, too.
crushedout
Posted by lookdownfish on September 26, 2004, at 17:02:16
In reply to Dream about T, posted by shortelise on September 25, 2004, at 13:42:30
Its a real cliche to say this, but it really depends what it means to you. For example, do you see cigarettes as satisfying, threatening, relaxing, comforting?
The thing that springs to my mind, is that maybe you feel embarrassed at being on the receiving end of the therapy and don't feel you can take any more from him? In smoking a cigarette, he is satisfying some of his own needs (in the therapeutic relationship) and by offering you one, also satisfying your needs. By taking the second one, you are trying to get more out of it....but this is difficult for you, hence the embarrassed feeling. Just my thought.
Posted by crushedout on September 26, 2004, at 17:10:56
In reply to Re: Dream about T » shortelise, posted by lookdownfish on September 26, 2004, at 17:02:16
Posted by gardenergirl on September 26, 2004, at 20:59:13
In reply to Re: Dream about T » shortelise, posted by lookdownfish on September 26, 2004, at 17:02:16
Hey, I had what seemed like a really good reply the other day, but it's not here???
I don't know if I can recreate it. I'll try and get back to you.
:(gg
Posted by shortelise on September 27, 2004, at 14:50:43
In reply to Re: Dream about T » shortelise, posted by lookdownfish on September 26, 2004, at 17:02:16
I know, I know, the cigar(ette) thing has been going through my head too.
***sigh***
ShortE
Posted by shortelise on September 27, 2004, at 14:52:15
In reply to Re: Dream about T » shortelise, posted by crushedout on September 26, 2004, at 16:26:14
I screwed up -
Yes, the cigar(ette) thing keeps going through my mind too.
ShortE
Posted by shortelise on September 27, 2004, at 14:58:42
In reply to Re: Dream about T » shortelise, posted by lookdownfish on September 26, 2004, at 17:02:16
Crushed, that makes me feel so much better!
In fact, I have been wanting to smoke lately - really wanting to. I quit about five years ago now and have only smoked maybe five cigarettes since.
I see them as filling a need, a place that's empty. I miss them. I wish I could smoke. But they are so bad for me, and I need to stay finsihed with them.
Hmm. It's a good analogy to ending therapy. Do I think it would be "bad" for me to stay in therapy? Hmm.
Food for thought. Thanks.
ShortE
Posted by shortelise on September 27, 2004, at 14:59:23
In reply to Re: Dream about T, posted by gardenergirl on September 26, 2004, at 20:59:13
Please try, gg! Thanks,
ShortE
Posted by gardenergirl on September 28, 2004, at 20:05:10
In reply to Re: Dream about T » lookdownfish, posted by shortelise on September 27, 2004, at 14:58:42
Hi Shorte,
I think this is similar to what I said before...I started with the car...you could say that your T is taking you on a journey (he was driving, right?) Or were you stopped...hmmm, that might indicate being stuck or having arrived. He offers you a cigarette (we'll leave the Freudian stuff out for now)...and you take two, but are embarrassed. He's offering you something that perhaps you used to use to calm yourself. But you both know this behavior is not in your best interest. And he's doing it too. So, perhaps you are seeing him as less than ideal now...more realistically? Or you want more from him than you think you should take?And the cigarette is, yes, a phallic symbol. So you could be wanting desperately to internalize him as it is something you take in via your mouth. (anyone for an ewwwww here?) But your dream is just using language that are symbols. So an oral fantasy, and cigarettes are oral more than phallic IMO, but I'm no dream expert...seems like a wish for nourishment or taking in your T.
So, was it worth the wait??? The most important thing, though is what YOU free associate to all the symbols. Dreams are a link from the unconscious to the conscious. Only your associations can create the path.
Good luck or hope it went well..not sure when you see him again..
gg
Posted by Annierose on September 28, 2004, at 22:33:14
In reply to Dream about T, posted by shortelise on September 25, 2004, at 13:42:30
Posted by shortelise on September 29, 2004, at 17:14:19
In reply to Re: So did you tell your T the dream? (nm) » shortelise, posted by Annierose on September 28, 2004, at 22:33:14
and will tell him then. I am a bit embarrassed about coming here and telling you all this dream - I'm embarrassed about coming here at all to tell the truth. I don't know if I can tell him about you.
But I do have to tell him this dream, and I really feel the interpretations os both gg and ... the other - forgive my blank mind.I will now go and have a rest and think more about this dream.
Last night I dreamt I was riding a horse along narrow, dangerous path on a cliff edge. I was afraid, so sure the horse would stumble but he didn't, he took the high, narrow trail surefootedly.
ShortE
Posted by Annierose on September 29, 2004, at 18:44:08
In reply to I see him tomorrow, posted by shortelise on September 29, 2004, at 17:14:19
I think your new dream says alot. You feel like you're on shakey ground, but you will be sure footed and move forward. Good Luck. You can do this!
Posted by shortelise on September 30, 2004, at 19:36:16
In reply to Re: Interesting new dream » shortelise, posted by Annierose on September 29, 2004, at 18:44:08
Thanks for all the responses, everyone.
I had every intention of telling him my cigarette dream today but BUT I had such an interesting dream last night: I dreamt that I was walking on 1st street, and there was a man on the other side of the street holding a baby, with him was a little girl. On my side of the street was a couple in their 30's. When I had walked past them, the little girl came across the street and asked me to take her with me.
Without words I understood that the couple were her parents, and that they did not understand her. I told her I could not take her with me, but that she must tell them when they are unkind that she is trying, doing her best. I hoped she would remember.This dream seemed so revealing, my T holding his own child, integrated, self-realized, watching me from the other side of the street, me unable to assume responsibility for my child, my self, having to leave her there with those critical voices, her parents.
It was a good session. At the end I told him the other dream very briefly. I said I'd tell it to him entirely in two weeks when I see him again.
ShortE
Posted by daisym on September 30, 2004, at 20:14:25
In reply to Saw T, posted by shortelise on September 30, 2004, at 19:36:16
You certainly have had a few powerful dreams in a row! I'm glad you had a good session. I think your interpretation is interesting. I was thinking it might be that your T has your youngest self but the older you get the more you feel you need to be responsible for speaking up to those critical voices. But you are still in view of him.
Of course...this is exactly my issue so I'm completely projecting here. *sigh* Can I use your dreams instead of mine?
Posted by shortelise on October 1, 2004, at 13:35:27
In reply to Re: Saw T, posted by daisym on September 30, 2004, at 20:14:25
Daisy, that is really interesting, that he might be holding the youngest me. I feel like crying when I think of it that way, so you may be onto something.
My T tells me that there are many ways of interpreting the same dream, that they are layered with meaning.I don't see why you shouldn't use my dreams - as long as we don't have the same T. Wouldn't that be funny?
I live by the sea. If you do too, maybe you should stick with your own dreams - lol.
ShortE
Posted by shortelise on October 1, 2004, at 13:38:20
In reply to Re: Saw T, posted by daisym on September 30, 2004, at 20:14:25
Abd your T sounds a lot, a LOT like mine. He would have been just the same with the stuffed animal.
We are very lucky.
ShortE
Posted by Susan47 on October 1, 2004, at 20:54:35
In reply to Re: Saw T » daisym, posted by shortelise on October 1, 2004, at 13:35:27
I don't know why you shouldn't use my dreams ... that just sounds so cute, why'm'I thinking Woody Allen? (how do you do the emoticon with the glasses? :)
Posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 21:20:02
In reply to Re: Saw T » daisym, posted by shortelise on October 1, 2004, at 13:35:27
My therapist will go back to dreams and see which things have changed over time. He said he believes that the way we remember them, and then how we switch things around is an indicator of our internal contructs...and how we organize things via our internal expectations. Which is why he keeps a dream diary of his own.
I didn't mean to make you tear up, but if it provoked such a powerful response, I guess the question is why you didn't see that possibility yourself...and why did it touch something off in you? The answer might be the really obvious one, but I do sometimes like the exercise of looking at dreams in which everything in it is some part of us...so which part of you is your therapist?
Last night I dreamed that I had to make a speech and the podium was 6 feet high and I'm only 5'3", so even with heels I wouldn't be able to see over. In my dream, I had to used the microphone anchored on the podium but I kept jumping up and down to judge the audience reactions...but I kept going and got through it.
I actually did have to give a speech today to a large audience. I opted for the clip on mic and told them about my dream. Since this was a speech about No Child Left Behind, I used the "behind" the podium dream to get a laugh. It worked.
I still want to use yours...and no, I live closer to a Bay, (S.F.) not the ocean.
Posted by crazymaisie on October 1, 2004, at 22:41:02
In reply to Re: Saw T » shortelise, posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 21:20:02
hi Daisy,
kind of off topic, but i'm in sf, too. nice to know you're somewhere nearby!
maisie
Posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 22:48:18
In reply to Re: Saw T » Daisym, posted by crazymaisie on October 1, 2004, at 22:41:02
Nice to know I have friends close and far. It felt for awhile like there were only a few of us here on West Coast time. Maybe we can resurrect Babble Open again.
I just wish it hadn't turned so cold already. I'm not ready yet!
Posted by crazymaisie on October 1, 2004, at 22:56:16
In reply to internet neighbors, posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 22:48:18
i hear you about the weather, i'm only here a year so i'm only getting used to the sudden unexpected temp changes. i come from a colder climate, though, so i'm not complaining (too much)
maisie
Posted by crazymaisie on October 1, 2004, at 22:58:26
In reply to internet neighbors, posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 22:48:18
btw, i was in open, but got cut off again. there are a few people in there right now. i'll try and go back in a bit
m
Posted by shortelise on October 2, 2004, at 0:09:19
In reply to Re: Saw T » shortelise, posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 21:20:02
I'm not great at interpreting my own dreams. Sometimes it helps to use the Gestalt thing of being everyone and everything in the dream and telling it from those perspectives.
Maybe I didn't see him as holding my infant self because I am supposed to be beyond that.
He says that I need to continue to evolve, to grow, without him. That I can't do it if I stay with him, that finding my capacity to take care of myself is an essential step to being ... well, whatever it is I am trying for. Mature, integrated, in control of my life and self.
Am I in some way trying to leave my infant self in the safety of his caring?
I think it's time for bed. Maybe I'll have a dream to further illuminate these questions.
I'm on the same ocean! Not very close, but the same ocean!
ShortE
Posted by shortelise on October 3, 2004, at 15:05:19
In reply to Re: Saw T » shortelise, posted by Daisym on October 1, 2004, at 21:20:02
Hi Daisy,
Hoefully you'll see on the list below when you read this that I did respond to your last post - just for some reason it is not shwoing up on the main list.
ShortE
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