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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
I have an appointment with my therapist tomorrow (I found out yesterday).
Not sure if I feel nervous or excited (maybe both).
I haven't been reading as much as usual because I'm been feeling quite emotionally swamped. But I've been thinking of you all.
With any luck a bit of therapy will render me capable of communicating again...
Missing you all.
Love,
Tamar
Posted by 10derHeart on February 16, 2006, at 19:23:30
In reply to Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible, posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
That's wonderful! I'm excited for you. Give it time, though. You know how maybe, when we don't see a very important person in our lives for quite some time, we may tend to build up their qualities, give them some almost superhuman powers without realizing it....?
Is this coming across right? I'm trying to say...you can take whatever time and methods and path you need to get well again. I've no doubt your T. will make a huge difference. But after seeing him just this first time, if it feels weird, or off, different than before, or even like a letdown,...anything other than amazing...that will be totally okay and normal. We'll be here and you can tell us all about it :-)
Gosh, though, you've waited so long for this. Let the acceptance, understanding and pain relief of good therapy begin! (((Tamar)))
Posted by annierose on February 16, 2006, at 19:38:46
In reply to Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible, posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
I am so happy that you can continue this theraputic journey ... please post when you are able about how it felt. I am pleased to read that your mother-in-law continues to improve. Hopefully seeing your T will lift your spirits too.
You'll probably be amazed at how quickly you reconnect. After a long absence, it was only a matter of a few sessions before all those loving feelings can flooding back.
Posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 19:46:03
In reply to Re: Normal service will be resumed as soon as poss » Tamar, posted by 10derHeart on February 16, 2006, at 19:23:30
> That's wonderful! I'm excited for you. Give it time, though. You know how maybe, when we don't see a very important person in our lives for quite some time, we may tend to build up their qualities, give them some almost superhuman powers without realizing it....?
That's very true.
> Is this coming across right? I'm trying to say...you can take whatever time and methods and path you need to get well again. I've no doubt your T. will make a huge difference. But after seeing him just this first time, if it feels weird, or off, different than before, or even like a letdown,...anything other than amazing...that will be totally okay and normal. We'll be here and you can tell us all about it :-)
Yeah, I'm anticipating that it will be different from what I expect. And I will probably feel very little connection to him. I will certainly come here and talk about it! I will probably cry a bit...
> Gosh, though, you've waited so long for this. Let the acceptance, understanding and pain relief of good therapy begin! (((Tamar)))
Thanks (((((10der))))) !
Posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 19:50:04
In reply to Re: Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible » Tamar, posted by annierose on February 16, 2006, at 19:38:46
> I am so happy that you can continue this theraputic journey ... please post when you are able about how it felt. I am pleased to read that your mother-in-law continues to improve. Hopefully seeing your T will lift your spirits too.
Thanks Annierose. Yeah, I think just being in the same room as him will be somewhat comforting.
> You'll probably be amazed at how quickly you reconnect. After a long absence, it was only a matter of a few sessions before all those loving feelings can flooding back.
That's heartening to hear. I've been expecting it to take some time. But if it's quick I think that'll be easier (at least until the whole I-want-to-be-special thing starts all over again...)
It's funny... in recent weeks I haven't been feeling the same kind of transferential stuff towards him. I've been thinking of him more as a kind of colleague; someone I work on stuff with. The transference has all been coming out in my marriage instead. So it'll be interesting to see what happens when I reconnect with my therapist!
Tamar
Posted by daisym on February 16, 2006, at 20:16:03
In reply to Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible, posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
I'm so pleased for you. I hope you are on the road to feeling better soon. I also hope he is open to talking about doing some deep work, more long term stuff you mentioned wanting to work on.
I'll keep you in my thoughts tomorrow. I hope it goes well.
Hugs, I miss you.
Daisy
Posted by James K on February 16, 2006, at 23:58:44
In reply to Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible, posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
Posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
In reply to Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible, posted by Tamar on February 16, 2006, at 18:43:47
Saw my therapist. I'd pretty much forgotten he looked like, but then he didn't recognise me either at first.
Had a good talk. I told him about how awful I've been feeling and what's been happening, and he was great as usual. The purpose of today's session was mainly to determine whether he'll be able to help me, and at the end he said he could, so that was a relief. Mind you, I didn't think he would turn me away.
Still not feeling waves of transference, or at least no urgent desires to tear off his clothes, but maybe that will return in due course :)
Thanks everyone for your support. I'm going away for the weekend so I won't be around until Monday, but I'll be thinking of you all.
Love,
Tamar
Posted by annierose on February 17, 2006, at 8:26:06
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
So glad it went well. So glad you got to see him.
If you feel hopeful, that is so good.I can't believe he didn't recognize you!! I hadn't seen my T for 15 years and she looked exactly the same, and she told me the same. Well, I think we both aged beautifully.
Posted by Dinah on February 17, 2006, at 11:07:30
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
I'm so happy for you. :)
Posted by fairywings on February 17, 2006, at 14:27:33
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
I'm glad it went so well and will be able to work together.
fw
Posted by damos on February 17, 2006, at 16:26:02
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
Can't add much to what the others have said. Just really happy for you.
Posted by 10derHeart on February 17, 2006, at 16:52:37
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
Sounds great!
You know, about the not recognizing you, I have some random thoughts. If I recall, weren't you pregnant the whole time before? Not that that is *enough* to explain it, but maybe, to some people, it makes a bigger difference than we's imagine. (He was overcome by your pregnancy glow and perceived you differently?!) But more than that, I think it shows your T. really is someone who consistently looked past the outside and remembered the "inside Tamar", so now is actually all fuzzy on your physical appearance.
I'm reminded, too, of the many posters who, even if they've been with their T's for a long while, can't recall if they wear glasses, eye color, etc. So, it can go both ways, maybe? If you tended to often not look at him (don't recall if you did or didn't), maybe he wasn't looking at you as much as he could have, either, so didn't *store* that memory efficiently?
Gosh....must be my owns fears leaking in here. I mean, it's not like you made a big fuss about the issue. That's all me. It's just kind of fascinating to me you'd each have some degree of this inability to remember each other's outer selves. It seems like an unexpected, but not at all bad thing.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Posted by happyflower on February 17, 2006, at 17:54:29
In reply to Re: Yippee! » Tamar, posted by 10derHeart on February 17, 2006, at 16:52:37
I am glad it went well. I guess if those old feeling come back, well you have a friend who really understands. :-)
Posted by orchid on February 19, 2006, at 12:04:37
In reply to Yippee!, posted by Tamar on February 17, 2006, at 5:51:04
Hi Tamar,
Nice to know you got to see your same T again. I hope and will pray that it goes well for you.
Love,
Orchid.
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