Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 797913

Shown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

needing cold hard solutions

Posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 19:32:15

i am in a fix. i need solutions. It's a financial thing. i need a way to get out of this trap i am in. i have come a long way, i have some safety nets... but i need a solution. Right now i am climbing the walls.

last week i had a major breakdown.. considered the hospital, which is an extreme for me. T has helped me crawl through it.. but there's nothing he can do about this.. in fact, this will mean i cant see him so much and maybe have to stop altogether at some point. :(

he's my lifeline right now

he really rattled my cage but he has been oh so supportive. i am not sure what to think of him. He goes against all my "rules." He was so encouraging and excited after tuesday's session... he said he was really impressed with me for how hard i was trying.

i cant lose him too.

so frustrated

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by star008 on November 30, 2007, at 19:55:20

In reply to needing cold hard solutions, posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 19:32:15

Dory,,Money is never an easy one to deal with and there are no quick solutions. Can you ask your T if he will accept a reduced rate.. MIne charges me MUCH less than his regular clients.. I feel guilty about it sometimes but he is okay with it..At least u have some safetly nets in place..

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » star008

Posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 21:41:00

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions, posted by star008 on November 30, 2007, at 19:55:20

hi star... thnx, you're right... money is not easy.i've been too embarrassed to ask T about reduced rate. i have to see him less first.. down to 1xweek. i know it sounds indulgent, but life really has been so very hard. i have needed him. So i will do that first... even with everything going on.

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory

Posted by Muffled on December 1, 2007, at 14:07:30

In reply to needing cold hard solutions, posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 19:32:15

Does your T not know you are in a finacially hard position?
Have you run it by him to see what he thinks your options might be?
I dunno of any honest/legal way to make money fast. I am not gonna suggest illegal ways. I am uneducated cept HS, and have only ever done min. wage jobs and mostly laobouring jobs at that.
I know up here there are certainly LOTS of jobs if a body wants them. My friend was making TEN dollars and hour in a COFFEESHOP!!! STARTING wage! So people are desprate for workers here. I dunno how it is in your area.
I know you have physical limitations as well. Can you do computer or phone work? Maybe with the right chair you could work it?
There are often food banks avail for food.
I just trying to think of ways to save money.
But if its only T that is the money prob, then maybe you could negotiate with him that you will only come 1x/wk and since your long term, maybe get a reduced rate? Then, maybe by pinching pennies REALLY hard you could work it?
Maybe you could get a cellular 'pay as you go' phone. Its cheaper than a land line if you don't phone much.
If your not using car, then maybe take insurance off for a few months and park it somewhere?
I am scrambling to try and think of options for you.
Hard when I don't know the whole scenario.
Anyhow , I need to keep moving, just wished I had something clever to tell you. I guess i don't :-(
Take care Dory, sorry its so hard :-(
M

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by rskontos on December 1, 2007, at 15:13:16

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory, posted by Muffled on December 1, 2007, at 14:07:30

He does know about the situation and that the H has the financial purse strings. And did you tell him when you went down to 1X weekly that it was money? So for your mental help, ask for any help...... or email it or say I might have to stop therapy since my h has the money and not me? See if he offers. I know it is hard to ask but nothing to be ashamed about!

Everyone has $$ problems sometimes. I wish I could help more. Can you get disability yet. Or unemployment or anyway any other organization would pay......rk

I am sorry I was not more help.

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory

Posted by Poet on December 1, 2007, at 16:33:26

In reply to needing cold hard solutions, posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 19:32:15

Hi Dory,

Last year when I was fired from my job, my T saw me for free for two months until the insurance coverage kicked in. Usually when the insurance ends I pay her half of what she bills. Maybe your T would be willing to let you pay less due to your financial circumstances? My T totally understood how badly I needed her last year and I felt guilty about not paying her, but she said consider it her gift to me.

I hope your T will arrange something so that you can still see him.

Poet

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by Dory on December 1, 2007, at 19:28:25

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory, posted by Poet on December 1, 2007, at 16:33:26

ok.. i'll give a little more detail... nervously. i can get by, barely, completely on my own... even have some emergency safety nets. All good. i have stayed in school, also good. If it was tuition, i'd say screw it b/c i'd figure it out over time. Tuition can be paid off.

This week i got a very sharp reminder that i am dangling on someone else's thread. It could break or be cut for whatever reason, innocent or malicious. It's not the end of the world this time, but it's a warning bell. The future is a long stretch to have this worry.

It's school & T vs eating & rent. If i stay in school i can't hold down a job that can pay enough. See my prob? Having a job this past summer gave me more confidence.But trying to be self-sufficient and be in school is a problem i cant find an answer to.

remember.. i have ONE semester left. Just one. April. i have to make it to april.

i haven't gone down to 1xweek yet.. telling him that monday. it's hard because i need him more right now.. i seriously have been having a nervous break down. The stress has caused recurrence of stomach pain and losec doesn't even help. i can't change my circumstances much right now, so my option is to deal with the stress.

last night was bad... stomping around... pacing.. eating ativan... drinking.

i left a message with T saying i had this financial landmine to deal with... and he knows some of the scenario, but as i have been going 2xweek i dont think he is aware of how precarious it is. If i had not had him this past week.. i just dont know.. i was so bad i couldn't have even done myself in..

so what do you guys think? school? no school? It's not the cost of school, it's that being in school prevents me from having a decent job for now.

i am cutting down and cutting back. People are getting pound cake for xmas. (maybe i'll give them 1/2lb cakes to save money? :o) ) i actually did the opposite Muffy... got rid of the cell phone b/c the rates were crazy and i need a phone.. it's also bundled with my internet, which i need to make said income.

cant take the insurance off the car as it isn't paid for, but i don't pay either one anyway. i rarely use it.. once a week to get to brunch with some friends, and if i have something big to move. i have a buspass that came with my tuition.

my rent isn't cheap, but it includes everything, heat, hot water, electricity, parking. It;s a very nice, clean place and is ok with little ones.. and it's walking distance to a lot of stuff.

my mom sends me calling cards so i keep my LD bill way down. i transferred debts around to consolidate and reduce interest rates.

crappy thing though... had my wallet stolen a few weeks ago.. cost me a lot of money :o( ID's, cards, buspass... ugh.

i have been so physically ill recently. It has left me exhausted and so i dont have enough time to do other things i could do to either cut down, or make more money.

i hate this. >:o< i hate being dependent.

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory

Posted by Muffled on December 1, 2007, at 20:42:32

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions, posted by Dory on December 1, 2007, at 19:28:25

Hmm tough situ all right...:-(
Well, can you just dangle hopefully and keep up with school?
If the cord is cut....well, deal with it then, at least you'll be prepared for the possibility.
I am SO glad you have found a decent T. Its sounds like he is a help.
Wish you could do 2x a week, I haven't ever done that, but I could see how progress would be MUCH faster. Once a week was real slow going for me for the first while,almost a waste of time in some ways, but its not so bad at the moment really.
Maybe if T knows your strapped for cash, he will give a cut on 1x/wk? Then its not too bad. Thats why I never ask for 2x really, cuz i am already on a big cut, it wouldn't be fair to ask for 2 at the cut,cuz then I could surely afford to pay more then for the one if I can afford 2, and it would still be too much anyways.Sigh...
I guess need to be content with what I got, I am very fortunate to have a very determined T.
I hope things can work for you. Seems like your doing all you can.
Good luck with it. I hope you can finish your school, that'd be a nice thing.
Take good care, sorry its hard for you right now.
Muffled

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » Muffled

Posted by Dory on December 1, 2007, at 22:26:14

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory, posted by Muffled on December 1, 2007, at 20:42:32

((((((((muffled)))))))))))

thnx

> Well, can you just dangle hopefully and keep up with school?
> If the cord is cut....well, deal with it then, at least you'll be prepared for the possibility.

omg.. this is so unbelievably sweet, simple and is probably the right answer. Ever get that feeling? you know, like how could i not just think of it that way?

you're right... and now that i have some emergency plans

i feel like an idiot. i guess i was in a panic and pretty pissed off too.

> I am SO glad you have found a decent T. Its sounds like he is a help.

oh god, you have no idea.. i dont post so much.. i've been really sick.

> Wish you could do 2x a week, I haven't ever done that, but I could see how progress would be MUCH faster.

you'd think that wouldn't you?

> Maybe if T knows your strapped for cash, he will give a cut on 1x/wk?

i dunno. i'm going to do the 1xweek 1st and re-evaluate as i go. i am embarrassed.. but when it comes down to it i want to hold off b/c it would be a bigger life-saver if things blew up. i may need a discount more later.

>it would still be too much anyways.Sigh...

(((((( ((((((muffled))))) )))))
pssst... thats a double hug

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory

Posted by star008 on December 2, 2007, at 7:33:37

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » star008, posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 21:41:00

Therapy isn't indulgent if you need it. It kind of sucks having to ask for a reduced rate but I can't pay the full price either. Cut down to once a week and see if that helps.. Then ask for a reduced rate if you are still having trouble..

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by Gee on December 3, 2007, at 13:57:21

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » Muffled, posted by Dory on December 1, 2007, at 22:26:14

(((((dory))))))

How are you doing with school right now? Are you going to pass this semester? Could you take one or two classes next semester instead of a full load, and then work more? I know it would prolong graduating, but it might make it affordable.

The t situation sounds difficult. How did it go on Monday? Was it okay?

I was trying to come up with something intelligent to say, but the only thing that is coming to my mind is a line from 'The Three Little Pigs'...

I hope each day is getting a little easier

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions » star008

Posted by Dory on December 4, 2007, at 17:35:57

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » Dory, posted by star008 on December 2, 2007, at 7:33:37

that's the plan. someone suggested to me i think about 2xweek alternating with 1xweek.. doesn't save as much money, but it keeps me more supported. This would be a tough point to not have T as close as possible

thnx :o)

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by llurpsienoodle on December 11, 2007, at 18:16:48

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions » star008, posted by Dory on December 4, 2007, at 17:35:57

dory, how are you doing?
did you get my bmails?

I hope your Tsolution is working out well. let us know, okay?

hugs,
-Ll

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by rskontos on December 11, 2007, at 18:18:58

In reply to Re: needing cold hard solutions, posted by llurpsienoodle on December 11, 2007, at 18:16:48

Yeah, dory I was going to babblemail you but I can just join Li and ask how are you.....rk

 

Re: needing cold hard solutions

Posted by wheatlandgirl on December 13, 2007, at 13:27:38

In reply to needing cold hard solutions, posted by Dory on November 30, 2007, at 19:32:15

Just a thought- is the hospital such a bad place to be? I always get compassionate, objective, team approached care in the hospital, and it has helped me a great deal!! I guess every hospital is different and ours may be among the best..you also get to bond with the other patients!!


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