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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
...they go on sabatical?
I'm sure it's different for each dif T, but what do you guys think? I think they relax, maybe go away on a vacation, do what they enjoy most.
... maybe they miss the therapy hour so much they sneak a peak on Babble... he he...
don't I have a crazy imagination?I think my T is playing golf, especially today it is going to be 68. Last week it was 17 and windy too.
I wonder how much my T thinks about his clients. (doesn't "clients" sound so much better than "patients"?)
I got to go to my client and get some work done there.
I'm not having too much fun with my T on sabatical. Today I see a dif T who I picked out from friends recommendations. He is real nice, this is my 3rd time. But, so far, this isn't really filling in for the rotten feelings I have about my T being away. It's really hard not to be depressed. So I thought it might be good to have a light post on what T's do when they go on sabatical. :-)
Joni
Posted by muffled on January 7, 2008, at 10:16:40
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
I think they spend the entire time thinking about their favorite clients, which each one of us babblers is!
They day dream about us being well and going forward in life. They think about missing us when we are done and hope we will keep in touch with them.
Mebbe they do other stuff too....
ROFL!!!
Good thread Joni!
M
Posted by seldomseen on January 7, 2008, at 11:18:11
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
I think it depends on the type of sabbatical they go on.
Some sabbaticals are actually working ones, where they go and study or train with someone else, or they do research, or they write books, articles, whatever.
The sabbaticals where they just take time off, well I would imagine they spend time with family, travel or maybe just sit and stare.
I think mine would most like just sit and stare for a while.
Seldom.
Posted by Dinah on January 7, 2008, at 12:07:48
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
I think mine would sleep and putter around his house, maybe go for a quiet trip to a resort or something with his wife.
He's mentioned a lot being tired. I think he'd do quiet things.
Posted by Phillipa on January 7, 2008, at 12:33:52
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » JoniS, posted by Dinah on January 7, 2008, at 12:07:48
I think the things I see neighbors do just things. Maybe a class? Shopping? Travel? Relax excercise? Guess it depends on age of therapist too and their hobbies and interests. Maybe also play catch up on docs appointments yearly stuff. Love Phillipa
Posted by Daisym on January 7, 2008, at 22:38:33
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » JoniS, posted by Dinah on January 7, 2008, at 12:07:48
I actually prefer the term "patient" - because it lends itself to the healing relationship and it reminds me what I have to have the most of - "patience." :)
I hope a sabbatical is filled with lots of rest, good food, gentle learning and great books.
Oh wait - perhaps that is what MINE would look like.
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:14:21
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when...., posted by muffled on January 7, 2008, at 10:16:40
Hey Muff
Your post is right on target for me. You knew that, didn't you? Although I need some light fun right now, my heart is aching, feeling like he doesn't give a sh_t about me, otherwise how could he abandon me? My head knows it's not true, but my heart really hurts.
I hope I don't continue this pity party too long.
Joni
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:16:53
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » JoniS, posted by seldomseen on January 7, 2008, at 11:18:11
Sit and stare... thats kind of pecular. Is that because he is a deep thinker?
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:19:02
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » JoniS, posted by Dinah on January 7, 2008, at 12:07:48
Dinah
Would he miss his patients at all? Think of them every week or two?
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:20:03
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when...., posted by Phillipa on January 7, 2008, at 12:33:52
Would he miss his patients at all?
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:22:46
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when...., posted by Daisym on January 7, 2008, at 22:38:33
Daisy
Thats a good sabatical. I would like that kind too. The only thing I would add is a nice, long, relaxing cruise to the Greek Islands.
If I only had the means....
Would your T miss his patients?
J
Posted by muffled on January 8, 2008, at 11:33:48
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » Daisym, posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 8:22:46
Joni,
Over Christmas break, I had a period of time where I was thinking...T is home, with her family, being happy...w/o me :-( WHAT about ME????? Now of course on a rational level I understood this was perhaps silly of me, and I kicked myself accordingly. But then I thot of what my T(and babblers) have said bout being kind to myself. So I tried again to look at my feelings in a kinder way.
So I came to understand that 'yes', maybe I was feeling jealous on some level, but thats OK, it is just an honest feeling and doesn't make me a bad person. I was also feeling maybe abandoned and needy. Again, honest feelings, not a federal crime...
And then I seem to be more able to let those feelings go.
But what I now know(well....most of the time anyways...)is that my T DOES care bout me.
UGH.
Anyways, I don't think she spends all her days thinking of me, but I know sometimes she does think of me.
I know(supposedly anyways...) that she doesn't mind when I touch base with her when I need to. When I am feeling lost.
I know that she does want me to be well. To be the best Muffled that I am able to be.
I know that she will not 'come and get me', cuz thats a boundary. But that she generally is good if I reach out to her. And sometimes her response SUCKS!!!!(LOL!) proly partly cuz I am not being clear, and maybe sometimes due in part to what is going on for her at the time. So I am pretty good at accepting these things now.
I bet over Christmas she DID think of me....(mebbe once or twice anyways....over 3 wks.....hmmmm....grrrr!!!;-s)
Dang, I am, as usual having a hard time getting my point across...
But, I guess what I might be trying to convey Joni, is that I bet your T HAS thought of you. He seems to care bout his clients. I bet he has mulled over all his clients. How could he NOT? Unless he was completely unfeeling, which does not seem to be the case, he MUST have thot about his clients. Wished you well in his heart.
So I dunno what you guys exactly arranged as far as contact?
But CAN you contact him? In an unintrusive way? Like email?
For long breaks I just tell my T happy stuff and say I am OK, and it feels like I am being good to her, and that feels good to me. And then the response I get is usu upbeat too, which is nice. Now the response you get from your T, if any, is likely to be rather unsatisfactory compared to seeing him regular at a session. But thats OK. I find if I go in with low expectations regarding response from T, then its easier to accept a response that is not really what I expected/wanted....
So maybe you could email T and say something along the lines of:
I miss you, but I am doing mostly OK.
I hope you are OK too.
Can you email or send me a voicemail just to let me know your out there?
Thanks.
I have done a similiar thing myself.
Over xmas I sent my T an email that said, Hi. That was it. When she picked it up a few days later, she mailed back and said yes, she was still there in cyberspace,thanks for the mail, and xmas was busy but happy for her. It was nice for me to hear this. It helped for a while.
I feel badly for you Joni that you feel so bad. But remember your feelings, are feelings, and feelings eventually pass. They ease up some over time. Keep trying to do as much as you can to keep busy and be around people that make you feel good.
Its almost like your in a grieving process. What w/T being gone so long.
My thing lately...is when I fussed. I make soup. Good hearty healthy soup. This makes me feel good to nourish my family, makes the house smell good.
Yesterday I made elk soup and just chucked 'whatever' into it, and my PICKY son loved it!!!! Go figger.
Take care Joni.
Wish I could ask you over for a cup of coffee.
M
Posted by Dinah on January 8, 2008, at 11:39:43
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
My knee jerk reaction would be that my therapist has a rotten memory and probably doesn't give me a second thought when he's not in the office.
But I asked him and he said of course he thinks about his clients. He wonders how they're doing or something reminds him of what they talked about. He says his clients are part of his life, and he couldn't imagine not thinking about them.
Posted by Poet on January 8, 2008, at 11:53:44
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
Hi Joni,
I know my T attends workshops/conferences: work so to speak related stuff. Though she also travels just for fun and shares photos with me of where she was. I guess she should be allowed fun, but she could take me with her, then again there goes her fun. LOL.
Poet
Posted by 10derHeart on January 8, 2008, at 13:53:28
In reply to Missing... » JoniS, posted by muffled on January 8, 2008, at 11:33:48
>Wish I could ask you over for a cup of coffee.
Ummm....could I come over, too. I like coffee and I like you.
And the elk soup with whatever chucked in sounds wonderful :-)
Reading your posts makes me feel good, muffy, even though I pretty much never post :-(
(and sorry Joni, I read all of this, but am so triggered by stuff about T's being gone I just can't participate ...i am moving away from mine in about 4 months....[tears] )
Posted by Dinah on January 8, 2008, at 14:02:53
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » JoniS, posted by Dinah on January 8, 2008, at 11:39:43
I'm actually glad you brought this up, Joni.
I'm still glowing from my therapist's answer. He provided enough examples that I found I (almost) believed him. And he said that with his clients, especially long term clients (and especially me) he couldn't imagine his clients not being part of his life. He thought it was odd that I'd think it was possible. :)
Posted by muffled on January 8, 2008, at 14:52:31
In reply to Re: Missing... » muffled, posted by 10derHeart on January 8, 2008, at 13:53:28
I have enjoyed your posts too 10der.
Thanks for that one. Felt good.
And I like you too!
I got some moose too!
Moose soup next week if you commin my way!
And I'll borrow my sisters latte machine and we can have lattes!
ALL are welcome!
:-)
M
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 16:35:01
In reply to Missing... » JoniS, posted by muffled on January 8, 2008, at 11:33:48
Thanks for the pep talk Muff.
I'd come if you'd have me for coffee.
I think I'll try the soup idea.
"Elk" soup?? ick yipes......ROFL
J
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 16:37:04
In reply to Re: Missing... » muffled, posted by 10derHeart on January 8, 2008, at 13:53:28
Posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 16:39:37
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when...., posted by Dinah on January 8, 2008, at 14:02:53
Yea dinah, you have a good T. I am happy to hear it. I will imagine that mine told me the same thing yours did!
J
Posted by Maxime on January 8, 2008, at 19:41:44
In reply to What do you think T's do when...., posted by JoniS on January 7, 2008, at 8:40:24
Posted by Dinah on January 9, 2008, at 19:15:18
In reply to Re: What do you think T's do when.... » Dinah, posted by JoniS on January 8, 2008, at 16:39:37
Joni, I've been thinking about it, and I'm pretty sure your therapist would say the same thing.
Even in my job, I think about people and wonder how they're doing. I might even, if not exactly miss them, then at least look forward to seeing them again.
I can only imagine if my job were to involve the sort of intimacy, however one sided, that therapists have with their clients. I'm sure I'd think about them while I was on sabbatical, and wonder how they were doing. I'm guessing you've been with your therapist long enough to know that he thinks of you in a positive way. Why wouldn't he think of you?
At Babble, when you don't see someone you're used to seeing around, don't you think of them? And hope they're doing well?
I don't think my therapist is all that unusual. Or if he is, it's more in the direction of thoughtlessness and forgetfulness. It's hard for me to think that your therapist would think any differently than mine, or would say anything different to you were you to ask.
This is the end of the thread.
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