Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 894120

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WARNING-Gruesome/trigger - handguns and depression

Posted by garnet71 on May 3, 2009, at 20:57:07

I wasn't sure where to even post this. My son's father's friend just committed suicide with a high-powered hunting rifle. His wife came home and found him. He did it in the basement...there was nothing left of a certain part of him...

My son's dad and a couple friends had to clean up buckets of blood, teeth, and pieces of skull..and other stuff. The police take much of it away, but they do not get it all. My son's dad was traumatized in doing this because this was a good friend of his, but felt he had to help with the clean up for the wife/widow.

This woman has to live the rest of her life with that image of how she found him.....the rest of her life with PTSD. I haven't spoken to her in over 15 years, but i have to drive by that house all the time and I feel her pain when I think of her being traumatized and what her reaction would have been like.

Everyone said he was the last person they would have expected to ever kill himself. He didn't complain about things or seem upset ever. He was having some financial problems with the economy and all, and his mother died just 2 days prior. No one knew he had depression. His mother had alzheimers and was pretty much brain dead for several years prior-no one realized how hard he took her death.. And I doubt he would have wanted his wife to find him like that, so it seems plausible that he temporarily 'lost it'.

Of course if you want to kill yourself, you'll find a way to do it. And of course it isn't because handguns are 'bad'. But having a handgun right there sure makes it more easy to accomplish this as a spontaneous decision. If you temporarily lose control, just seeing it there or knowing it's in the room encourages the decision. This may be why so many more men are more successful in committing suicide-they tend to use handguns and women tend to use pills or other methods.

My son's father's sister-my son's aunt-shot herself in the head with a handgun many years ago. Her 2 year old daughter found her in the morning. She had recently started taking Prozac before her death. She was a beautiful young woman. Again, I couldn't imagine her consciously blowing her head off knowing her little girl would find her like that. she was a good mother. It was not her fault.

I can't image the pain these people have to go thru the rest of their lives--and the PTSD...

So If you have a handgun or rifle and have depression, please, please give it to someone until you recover. If you know someone who has depression, a friend, relative--please try to get their weapons until they get better. The persons committing suicide obviously couldn't help it at the time--but if you are reading this--you can prevent this from happening to someone you love. It hurts to think of these women I used to know and what the torture they now have to go through for the rest of their lives. Please think about this--thank you.

Sorry if this is really sickening to hear, but I had to get this off my chest. All this talk of death around me...and my son's father's wife just called me and was bawling her eyes out..and the funeral is tomorrow...it is just too much to hold inside. So I'm releasing this pain...the pain I feel in thinking of the torment of not those who committed suicide--but the surviving loved ones. If someone reads this and it sinks in, I hope it could prevent this from happening to someone else in the future. If you own guns, please don't think you are immune from this happening to you. Please think about this while you are intact. Why take the chance...

 

Re: WARNING-Gruesome/trigger - handguns and depression

Posted by Ceres on May 4, 2009, at 0:08:06

In reply to WARNING-Gruesome/trigger - handguns and depression, posted by garnet71 on May 3, 2009, at 20:57:07

Garnet, I'm sorry that you have this in your psyche now.

I wish there were more safety nets during this economic collapse, a triage of both social & psych services to offer hope & prevent more catastrophe.

Good of you to lend emotional support to his spouse.

 

Re: WARNING-Gruesome/trigger - handguns and depression

Posted by B2chica on May 15, 2009, at 11:53:16

In reply to WARNING-Gruesome/trigger - handguns and depression, posted by garnet71 on May 3, 2009, at 20:57:07

i would just like to say, yes it is a triggering topic and needs caution reading. but it is very important to post this stuff. Not only for you but for others.

i know for me, many...many times i wished i had a gun so that it would be quick, so that i could just "do it" while my impulses were in control.

i don't own a gun for that very reason. its just to easy to grab it and have it be a sure shot.

*******************
also what you mentioned about the findings is another thing that helps me to "not go through with it".
because i push myself to think not just about the 'act' but the afterwards.
who finds you, where, when. and force myself to imagine what it would be like for that person.

all of that helps me, although Very unpleasant and very painful, does help me to maybe reach out once more to someone or something.

***************
i am very sorry this has touched you and your son in such a way.
please continue to talk about it. as much as you need to.
but take care of yourself. only do what you can.

best wishes.
b2c.


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