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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by AdaGrace on July 14, 2005, at 1:34:27
I can't make it go away.
I still miss him.
I still cry.
I still hurt.I let someone else in, and it's so painful that he is not him.
It's so painful.
So lonely.
Empty.God, I feel like nothing.
What a stupid little baby I must sound like.
Got your foot stepped on little girl?
Well, get up off your *ss and get over it.Easier said than done.
How do I go on?
How do I move forward?I can't even find my feet.
Everything is blurry.I just can't see a future without him.
I really can't.So why bother right?
Posted by AdaGrace on July 14, 2005, at 1:37:26
In reply to Can't stop the pain, posted by AdaGrace on July 14, 2005, at 1:34:27
As many as I am alive?
I mean really, how long is the hurt going to last?
Forever.
Yes, that is what i said.
I will love him forever.
It's true.
Posted by Damos on July 14, 2005, at 17:16:42
In reply to Re: How many years is it going to take?, posted by AdaGrace on July 14, 2005, at 1:37:26
Yes Grace, the love and the pain will last forever. I know this for a fact because I carry mine with me everyday.
But I do know that in my own case that I have been loved and touched (emotionally and spiritually) more in the last 18mths than I ever have before and ever was or could have been by that person - but it will never change their meaning and importance to me.
Posted by AdaGrace on July 15, 2005, at 9:22:58
In reply to Re: How many years is it going to take? » AdaGrace, posted by Damos on July 14, 2005, at 17:16:42
I spent 20 years waiting for a better life to knock on my door, and now all I see is the next 20 years living without the hope of that better life being out there.
Posted by Damos on July 17, 2005, at 17:50:11
In reply to Re: How many years is it going to take? » Damos, posted by AdaGrace on July 15, 2005, at 9:22:58
Yeah I know what you mean and what you're feeling. I've made a lot of mistakes and bad choices (one of which I'm currently trying to survive one day at a time).
I haven't had a physical relationship since Jesus played quarterback for Jerusalem or even just a special someone in a very, very long time. But in the last couple of years I have made maybe three friends that have shown me that things can be different and better. Friendships where it's not all one-way traffic; where I don't feel depleted and defeated by the interactions but good and even sometimes energized. They're enough to keep that little light flickering inside hoping that if I keep working on me then the things around me will change too and maybe I can work hard enough and be good enough that someday I'll create a friendship that'll grow into something more. I need to keep hoping.
This is the end of the thread.
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