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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 3:36:54
*jay*>>>I am very sorry that I brought my crap over to your board. I know you were having a hard time after a while establishing your board and I didn't help one bit! You are a good guy and it's my loss.
*st. james*>>> I am sorry that you were affected by my actions, I was going through a very difficult time, and am working on getting better.
*ayuda*>>>I am so sorry for leaving what I did on your Messenger, you really tried to help me and understand where I was coming from. I wish I could go back and change what I said to you, but I can't. I thought you were ignoring me when I typed, and I assumed that you were playing games with me, which wasn't the case? You said you were 'away' I should have given you the benefit of the doubt. I'm very sorry.
*Dragonslayer*>>>I am very sorry if you were affected by my actions. You were a big help in supporting me, and you didn't deserve to be affected by my thoughtless words and actions.
*zeliva*>>>even though you called me a 'B****', and yes, I called you some ugly names, I'm sorry for my part and the words I said that were mean to you. I didn't appreciate you conversing with my friend online behind my back. Maybe you were trying to help, but after I found out what you said, it made me want to fight back with you more, I eventually stopped~you know that. I'm sorry for my part concerning you.
and most of all...SBOTRAN(sp)>>>she was the most caring, supportive person I corresponded with through email and showed such concern when I talked about suicide. She and I emailed each other almost everyday and I know she clearly was affected and I won't ever forget how this affected her. I was wrong, and mean, and I didn't take her feelings of concern into account~just what I was feeling and for that I am truly very sorry.
****These were the people that I know now, (just finding out tonight through an email from 'ZenHussy') (which I am replying to affter this post)who were affected by my actions of feeling hopeless, suicidal, and angry. If there is anyone I forgot, bring it to my attention.
One last thing, I am not expecting anyone to forgive me despite what anyone I affected thinks, I am here to make amends and continue posting, as I have. I know what I did was wrong and I'm fixing it from my end. It is others' choices whether they want to forgive me, I can only make amends. If I could go back and change my actions, I would, but I cannot. This is a 'mental health' board, I come here for the same reason pretty much everyone else does to interact, offer experience, get support, and learn. It seems lately that I haven't asked for any support and I won't anymore if that makes everyone feel better. Honestly!
And before I get any responses about me manipulating, or blaming, that is not what I am doing at all here!!!
I have owned up to my actions and am making amends to the best of my ability. I'm sorry to those of you who were affected find that unacceptable, I cannot change what you think or how you respond to me, it is a choice only you make. I've made my choices and I'm following through and I have a right who I want to respond to now after all this is said and done.
I am a human being, human beings make mistakes, and I will not allow the people I hurt and who weren't even involved to accuse me of making excuses. I am apologizing, making amends, that's all I can do on my part. Yes, what I did was hurtful to some, some are angry, and some are harrassing me, it's the risk I took, because I'd rather be honest, make amends and mean them, be sincere, and learn from my mistakes, than to leave hurt with people I have met online and affected the ones that were truly affected badly. The hurt was done, I cannot go back, I am now moving forward.
Posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 4:31:37
In reply to The Last of My Amends...., posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 3:36:54
lil jimi!!!!!
During that time we exchanged pictures, you even showed me your baby, and you were a blessing.
I have obviously blown you out of the water by this confession (and I would venture a guess that is an understatement) and I am truly sorry. You are a very kind human being and you did not deserve to be affected by my actions back then at all!~no one did.
I am so sorry, I will never forget how kind you were, it IS my loss.
Take care of yourself and I wish you nothing but happiness and the best, you deserve it, you have a lot going for you.
I'm so very sorry!!
Posted by Chicklet on October 7, 2003, at 8:07:09
In reply to The Last of My Amends...., posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 3:36:54
>>>>> *st. james*>>> I am sorry that you were affected by my actions, I was going through a very difficult time, and am working on getting better.
This is an apology AND an excuse.>>>>*zeliva*>>>even though you called me a 'B****', and yes, I called you some ugly names, I'm sorry for my part and the words I said that were mean to you. I didn't appreciate you conversing with my friend online behind my back. Maybe you were trying to help, but after I found out what you said, it made me want to fight back with you more, I eventually stopped~you know that. I'm sorry for my part concerning you.
It's not 'making amends' for others if you continue to bring up what they did to you in the context of your apologies. You want to say you're sorry...EVEN though, she called you a bitch. wow.
>>>>>I'm fixing it from my end.
that's what you may think, but I don't think that it's that simple, Kristen. Maybe this will assuage your guilt..and I do see that you are TRYING to make things right...but that's not really the way it works.
>>>>>> It is others' choices whether they want to forgive me, I can only make amends.
nah, that's not really all you can do.
And please stop speaking of "others" choices about "whether they WANT to forgive you". You seem to be looking at this in a backwards fashion.>>>>I have a right who I want to respond to now after all this is said and done.
Yup that's your right, but don't expect warm welcomes left and right.
>>>>>and I will not allow the people I hurt and who weren't even involved to accuse me of making excuses.
What qualifies as "involved" for you?
And you can't really stop people from expressing their opinions about this whole thing.
As far as I'm concerned I see it as you making excuses. It's not an accusation.So. Good luck with all that.
It's just not going to die down for a while. i hope you understand that. You aren't making things better.
Posted by Dinah on October 7, 2003, at 8:33:34
In reply to The Last of My Amends...., posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 3:36:54
>
> The facts were that I was suicidal, the wrong was when I faked it. I'm sorry.
>
I'm sorry you were feeling so bad, and I do believe that you were.> >>>>You didn't add that you faked suicide attempts four times.
>
> I recall 2x
>
Gabbi may be counting a few times where you said things that led people to believe you were going to commit suicide then didn't post for a while. That was on Psycho-Babble medication board I believe.
> >>>>We proved that we cared four times (well admittedly some of us, only three) and yet you came came back and called us losers and suckers for falling for your ruse.
>
> I'm sorry for calling you names~it was childish, AND hurtful, I know.
>
I also recall the post on Jay's board, right before he took it private, where you were laughing at the deception. I must admit though, that you appeared to be laughing at Dr. Bob, at the idea that he would be worried about a lawsuit, not at fellow posters.> >>>>You threatened people on this board, and over email, and when you no longer could do it here you continued on Jay's board. This was no short burst of rage.
>
> >>>>You're right, it lingered on to jay's board for about 3 weeks, but what threats did I make, can you clarify that for me?I'm don't know the nature of the threats as they were off board. That's why I'm having trouble figuring out the ethical issue here. If the threats were sufficiently violent, and caused enough harm to other posters (by for example, scaring them about their safety), I almost feel like I would be harming them by forgiving all and welcoming you back with open arms. Well, not forgiving all, but welcoming back at least. I can't, of course, forgive offenses to others only to myself. If the threats were sufficiently severe, I rather think my ethical obligation is to follow the lead of those who were harmed. But I just don't know becaues I don't have the information. They were referred to on Admin by several posters, but they weren't posted. I wonder if Dr. Bob would consider allowing them to be posted so that people could better consider the facts. With asterisks as needed, of course.
> I know I was threatened by Nikki that my computer would be hacked into....
> *ayuda*>>>I am so sorry for leaving what I did on your Messenger, you really tried to help me and understand where I was coming from. I wish I could go back and change what I said to you, but I can't. I thought you were ignoring me when I typed, and I assumed that you were playing games with me, which wasn't the case? You said you were 'away' I should have given you the benefit of the doubt. I'm very sorry.
>
> *zeliva*>>>even though you called me a 'B****', and yes, I called you some ugly names, I'm sorry for my part and the words I said that were mean to you. I didn't appreciate you conversing with my friend online behind my back. Maybe you were trying to help, but after I found out what you said, it made me want to fight back with you more, I eventually stopped~you know that. I'm sorry for my part concerning you.
>And also the Zenhussy post.
You might get a bit better reception to your amends if you own complete responsibility yourself, without listing the offenses of the person you're apologizing to (most especially if those offenses were responses to your own).
If you'd rather get the input of an unbiased source, perhaps you could bring your amends and ZenHussy and Jyl and Nikki posts to your therapist, and tell her what I suggested about amends and not blaming others. See what (s)he thinks.
My therapist has been able to point out that my posts are a bit sanctimonious at times. And I reluctantly have to agree that there is a bit of truth in that. Perhaps your therapist could give you a few hints on ways to word things so as to increase the likelihood that they would be well received.
Incidentally, many of the people you are making amends to left this board, right after the incidents you are referring to. I'm not sure they'll have a chance to read them.
Best of luck to you.
Posted by gabbix2 on October 7, 2003, at 10:43:26
In reply to Re: The Last of My Amends.... » galkeepinon, posted by Dinah on October 7, 2003, at 8:33:34
You have done NOTHING to amend anything except in your own mind.Cut the B.S GAL
We don't believe you!
Posted by KimberlyDi on October 10, 2003, at 14:13:50
In reply to The Last of My Amends...., posted by galkeepinon on October 7, 2003, at 3:36:54
I'm lost about this subject. What happened.
I was offline for several days. Yet another breakup with the husband. Got back together with him after having to take him to the hospital. His blood pressure was sky high, face red, eyes protruding, unable to stop crying and freaking out. Went to the doctor myself, been disgnosed with Grade A Streptococcus, non-invasive type thankfully, or I would have rotted away in 24 hours from the inside out. I'm having to taper off Effexor because my blood pressure won't come down. Haven't been switched to a new AD yet so I'm emotionally defenseless.
I come back to the middle of some war of words. I've already ruffled feathers and I don't understand why.
Gal: You've never done anything to hurt my feelings, intentionally or unintentially. You are struggling on, as we all are. God Bless, and keep "keeping on."
KDi in Texas
Posted by galkeepinon on October 10, 2003, at 14:32:47
In reply to Re: The Last of My Amends.... » galkeepinon, posted by KimberlyDi on October 10, 2003, at 14:13:50
(((((KDi))))) I missed you, I was wondering how you were doing!
>>>>>Yet another breakup with the husband. Got back together with him after having to take him to the hospital. His blood pressure was sky high, face red, eyes protruding, unable to stop crying and freaking out. Went to the doctor myself, been disgnosed with Grade A Streptococcus, non-invasive type thankfully, or I would have rotted away in 24 hours from the inside out.
God, I am so sorry you are going through all of this, you don't deserve it~no way.
I wish I could wave some kind of magic wand and make it all better, God do I!! My thoughts and prayers are with you during this time, please hang in there and hope for the best sweetie.>>>>>I'm having to taper off Effexor because my blood pressure won't come down. Haven't been switched to a new AD yet so I'm emotionally defenseless.
Effexor can do that to some, maybe there is another AD your doc can prescribe for you, like Lexapro. Keep on keepinon...never give up!
>>>>>I come back to the middle of some war of words. I've already ruffled feathers and I don't understand why.
You have never 'ruffled *my* feathers' you are as true as they come, my dear. Please take care of you:-) I'm always here for you, always,
just ask:-)>>>>>Gal: You've never done anything to hurt my feelings, intentionally or unintentially. You are struggling on, as we all are. God Bless, and keep "keeping on."
Thank you so much for your support, it means so much KDi. I'll never forget your kindness.
(((hugs)))
Hang in there,
Kristen
This is the end of the thread.
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