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Posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:47:42
In reply to Re: Me too, posted by Tabitha on October 8, 2003, at 23:35:49
You must be in my neck of the woods. Or at least my neck of the country? You don't have to be too specific, but what state are you in?
Posted by Adia on October 8, 2003, at 23:48:33
In reply to Anybody awake?, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:11:32
Hannah :o)
just wanted to say hi to you :o)
i am awake but not for long..it's 2 am here and i feel soooooo sleepy. My kitty has decided to use my bed to sleep tonight (as almost every night :o)sweet dreams to you...
(or is it morning there?)have a lovely day..!
Adia.
> I'm just feeling a little social. (Gasp!)
Posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:48:44
In reply to Re: 8 hours of sleep in three days (nm), posted by Sabina on October 8, 2003, at 23:29:17
That's terrible! What's keeping you awake?
Posted by Dinah on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:17
In reply to Re: I am. Not for much longer., posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:36:05
Harry's my dog with cancer. We didn't want to go the chemo route because it doesn't sound all that effective for dogs, so we're doing an experimental tamoxifin trial.
My therapist has a love hate relationship with this place. At first he was glad I was having social relationships period. Then I started having trouble with the blank slate of the internet. When I started to deal with it better, with only the occasional flareup, he got to be better with it too. So now he cautiously likes this place, and uses it to teach me life lessons.
Posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:39
In reply to Re: Anybody awake? » HannahW, posted by Adia on October 8, 2003, at 23:48:33
Ohmigosh! 2 am? Do you have a job? Ugh!
Posted by octopusprime on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:40
In reply to Re: west coast check in » octopusprime, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:40:17
hi hannah
ok i'm going to dish details. :) this guy i have known as a passing acquaintance for a few years now.
i think it counts as a date if we go out for sushi after work. he is kind of cute (spiky hair, nice smile), but he has a really big forehead and a weird shaped head in general. but the more i get to know him the more i don't see the weird shaped head ...
we have been out for dinner three times now in the last month, just us two. i think there is a little chemistry but i am not sure. we both split the tab so it's not like a real "date", just dinner. or is it a date? i don't know ...
i resolved after last time to try and do a little more digging into what's going on, but instead i babbled like an idiot about anything that came into my head because i had a messed up day and wound up saying kind of inappropriate things. (and doing the whole class clown routine out of being nervous). but he thinks my jokes are funny. not a bad sign, but i'm still kicking myself.
how confusing!
Posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:53:39
In reply to Re: west coast check in, posted by octopusprime on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:40
Those are good details! My husband has spiky hair and he's so sexy! :) It's good that you're noticing his funny-shaped head less and less. That says some pretty significant stuff!
Are you just now getting back from your date? If so, that was a pretty long one! Sushi is a very cool date, if you asked me.
Very cool that you're taking it pretty slow. I honestly think the best relationships start slowly. Have you ever seen Blind Date on TV? Horrifying! It boggles my mind that people are willing to put themselves on display like that!
Where did you meet this guy?
Posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:57:41
In reply to Re: Babble and tamoxifin » HannahW, posted by Dinah on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:17
I'm so sorry about your dog. :( Is he more of a family member or a pet to you? Sometimes losing a pet feels like losing your best friend. How long has he had cancer? Is there a decent prognosis, or are you just trying to make him comfortable? Are these questions too hard? I don't mean to stir things up.
How old is your son? Did I ask you that already?
Is the "down" part of this current cycle because of recent goings-on on the board, or just because you happen to be in a "down" cycle? Or something else?
Posted by Adia on October 8, 2003, at 23:59:40
In reply to Re: Anybody awake? » Adia, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:49:39
yes, I am a teacher ;o)..but I'll still be able to sleep a few hours..
I find it a little hard to fall asleep sometimes but it's getting easier lately.I thought it would be 4 am or so there where you are...
I wish you a nice day...
i'll try to get some sleep but I wanted to say hi to you :o)
Love,
Adia.
> Ohmigosh! 2 am? Do you have a job? Ugh!
Posted by Tabitha on October 9, 2003, at 0:00:46
In reply to Re: Me too, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:47:42
but I Must! Log! Off! G-night. And P.S. I think you handled Searchlight's query REALLY well. Very tactful.
Unplugging the cord now...
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:01:23
In reply to Re: Anybody awake? » HannahW, posted by Adia on October 8, 2003, at 23:59:40
Adia, you are truly, truly a sweet soul. I appreciate how much you reach out to people, including me.
What grade do you teach? I work for a school district too.
Posted by Sabina on October 9, 2003, at 0:02:03
In reply to Re: 8 hours of sleep in three days, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:48:44
new med problems...trying to wait out the (mental) side effects. i just keep saying, it'll be okay, it'll be okay.
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:02:25
In reply to Re: Let's just say Conan is my leader now. » HannahW, posted by Tabitha on October 9, 2003, at 0:00:46
Thank you, Sweetie. Sweet dreams.
Hannah
Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2003, at 0:05:10
In reply to Re: Babble and tamoxifin, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:57:41
> I'm so sorry about your dog. :( Is he more of a family member or a pet to you? Sometimes losing a pet feels like losing your best friend. How long has he had cancer? Is there a decent prognosis, or are you just trying to make him comfortable? Are these questions too hard? I don't mean to stir things up.
Definitely a family member. It's really not known what will happen. It's all experimental. He's on something called the Navy protocol (Navy was a dog who is still alive two years on it). It's a mixture of tamoxifin, celebrex, and doxycyclin. If it works, he can possibly live out his natural life span since he's thirteen. If it doesn't work, his life span can be measured in weeks or months.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/262931.html
>
> How old is your son? Did I ask you that already?
>
Seven now, believe it or not. I still don't. :)> Is the "down" part of this current cycle because of recent goings-on on the board, or just because you happen to be in a "down" cycle? Or something else?
Heaven only knows what causes my moods. I'm under a fair amount of stress so that could be it. But sometimes I handle stress adequately, and sometimes I don't. I guess that's where the illness part comes in. :(
But I do know that however I feel, I won't feel that way too long. And that's kind of nice.
Posted by octopusprime on October 9, 2003, at 0:06:11
In reply to Re: west coast check in » octopusprime, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:53:39
well it's 10 pm here. i got home just before 9, and that was after an hours walk home to clear the head. so it was a two hour dinner thing, leaving to go home at 8! which is why i do the is-it-a-date-or-are-we-friends-going-to-dinner routine.
this guy used to work with a guy who used to be my roommate (not the evil rooommate, another one). as it turns out my new job is within walking distance of both his work and home, so i false-pretensed my way into dinner post-breakup on the "low-hanging fruit" theory.
you're right, the just dinner thing is nice in a way. i don't have to slurp tequila off body parts and admit to strange sexual practices like on those repulsive dating shows. (which i shamefully admit to having watched waaaaaaaaaaay too many times for my own good in fits of self-pity). however that means i still get to spend way too much time by myself. blech. still got issues. need therapy.
don't mind my incessant chatter it must be stress :)
Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2003, at 0:06:59
In reply to Re: Babble and tamoxifin, posted by Dinah on October 9, 2003, at 0:05:10
Posted by kara lynne on October 9, 2003, at 0:08:56
In reply to Re: Anybody awake? » HannahW, posted by Adia on October 8, 2003, at 23:48:33
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:09:20
In reply to Re: 8 hours of sleep in three days, posted by Sabina on October 9, 2003, at 0:02:03
Are you feeling jittery and wide awake? Or paranoid? Or...?
I don't mean to pry. I've had similar med-induced awake periods. For some reason, Paxil, which apparently typically makes people drowsy, had me on an awake cycle pretty much like yours. I bet the worst is over for you, though. It seems like that sort of thing only lasts a few days. I remember getting up in the middle of the night and guzzling beer just in hopes of getting a *little* sleep! Do you have any painkillers or sleeping pills? (Not that I, being unlicensed, would *EVER* suggest self-medicating...!) Hee hee!
I hope you get some relief tonight.
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:10:11
In reply to Re: I'm off to bed. Night all. (nm), posted by Dinah on October 9, 2003, at 0:06:59
Good night, Dinah. I wish you the sweetest of dreams.
Posted by Adia on October 9, 2003, at 0:11:13
In reply to Re: Anybody awake?, posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:01:23
Dear Hannah,
Thank you for saying that..! it means a lot to me that it can mean something to you! :o)
Thank you for being here!
Thanks for sharing you work for a school too..
I teach third and fourth grade.
it changes all the time, I taught teenagers last year...I am a bit shy and insecure but I love teaching children.It was nice to come tonight and find you here :o)!
sorry I will have to go and get some sleep...
but know that you can count on me! :o)hugs,
Adia.> Adia, you are truly, truly a sweet soul. I appreciate how much you reach out to people, including me.
>
> What grade do you teach? I work for a school district too.
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:13:16
In reply to Re: Anybody awake? » HannahW, posted by Adia on October 9, 2003, at 0:11:13
Good night, Love. Have a good day tomorrow. I'll see you soon.
Posted by Adia on October 9, 2003, at 0:16:11
In reply to My kitty uses me as a bed/ Adia (nm), posted by kara lynne on October 9, 2003, at 0:08:56
Hi Kara,
My kitty sends purrs to yours :o)
I smiled that yours uses you as bed...
Mine is now sleeping on my pillow...I just love him so much!smiles,
Adia.
Posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:17:28
In reply to Anybody awake?, posted by HannahW on October 8, 2003, at 23:11:32
I'm feeling sleepy too. Thank you, everyone. I've enjoyed visiting tremendously.
Good night, Octopus.
Good night, Dinah.
Good night, Adia.
Good night, Kara.
Good night, Tabitha.
Good night, Sabina.
Good night, Jim Bob.Rest, love, and healing to us all,
Hannah
Posted by Adia on October 9, 2003, at 0:19:10
In reply to Re: Anybody awake?, posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:17:28
Posted by Sabina on October 9, 2003, at 0:28:43
In reply to Re: 8 hours of sleep in three days, posted by HannahW on October 9, 2003, at 0:09:20
hannah,
thanks for asking.
i talked about what's going on with me tonight with the topamax over on the meds board. i won't get any answers, though. i never do. i'm being negative, i know. i am paranoid, agitated, delusional, and afraid.
i can put up with the physical stuff. i just can't stand to feel like i'm losing my mind again. i may end up taking another half mg of xanax soon. i lost all taste and desire for alcohol when i started seroquel, which is great.
i'm just looking for an idea as to when i can hope to have these se's abate and the good effects kick in. also, it's just been *such* a rough few days around here. i've only been posting since april so i wasn't even directly affected by the original nightmare, but it's still upsetting all 'round, as i'm sure you'll agree.
i'm not typically a "social" person. i'm very talkative and friendly, i just don't usually do groups. i'm awfully glad for your presence on the board the past few days and glad you were up tonight to chat!
going to get some laundry out of the machine, now. at least i'm getting some things accomplished while i'm crazy and sleepless! i just wish i could be focused enough to cross on over into full on hypomania so i could actually get the house *clean* instead of just maintained.
-bina
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