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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Sabina on January 2, 2004, at 0:36:55
In reply to Feeling Unworthy and unable ..., posted by Brown_cow on January 1, 2004, at 19:30:56
self confidence...that's a tough one. i've been struggling with that one myself with very little progress. first things first, though:
it sounds to me as if, in the aftermath of your illness/accident, that you're still in "self preservation" mode. i think that's quite natural. it's not that you didn't have it in you to care about the welfare of the stray dog, but that motivation is just further down on your list of priorities since your subconscious response factors are grounded in fear based emotions. i tend to do a *lot* of this myself and i suffer from a chronic illness.
incidentally, i did it a lot more often, or to a greater extreme, before i got on the meds that were right for me. proper medication made a world of difference for me, as did getting proper sleep and improved nutrition. i know those things are pretty obvious, but they really can't be stressed enough. could any of these things be part of the problem?
i don't know how you feel about this sort of thing, but have you tried using affirmations, doing yoga, or any other mind opening, positivity type approaches? some light yoga could also be a step toward your exercising goal with spiritual benefits added.
that's how *i* deal with "energy stealing mind garbage", through all manner of esoteria (and pharmacopeia); and when that doesn't work i use tough love on myself: "shut up, get in the car, and go to the gym. you're lucky to even have a gym, you whiner." something like that. ;) only half kidding.
i get so fragile sometimes i think i *will* break. then, when a stray dog growls at you, it can seem almost as if the whole of nature is conspiring against you.
what, even god's little lost puppies want to hurt me now? screw this, i'm going inside!
i've considered taking a class (in whatever) to bolster my confidence and then i think, but i need more confidence *before* i can manage to take the class! it's a mess, i know. i hope some or any of this helps. i just wanted you to know you weren't alone in feeling this way.
bina
Posted by Brown_cow on January 2, 2004, at 11:31:16
In reply to Re: Feeling Unworthy and unable ... » Brown_cow, posted by Sabina on January 2, 2004, at 0:36:55
I don't know, I do not think my reaction to the dog was really bad at all. A stray dog who is barking and growling and obviously upset is kind of scary. It was the reaction I had to thinking I had not felt sorry for the little dear at the same time which bugged me more.
How we are preceived as people is tied to our survival I guess and I haven't made as much progress towards being independent again after my accident as I want. So I'm thinking my reaction is kind of tied to this little life situation. I'd be upset to find I can't be taken care of anymore because I show upset towards little dogs. :D funny eh
come to think of it, most of the setbacks in my progress have come through emotional upset more than any other cause. I get upset and then feel bound by my own emotions and can't think streight to do schoolwork or dont' have the emotional drive to do exercises. There was a period when anger was a huge factor becasue I was angry at how I got hurt at work and how perceived friends turned on me and other people and things durring a long time of unrest. I finally came to the conclusion that I don't like being being subject to my emotions all the time. So I've started trying meditation with some success.
Well wish you all success.
Posted by reluctant on January 2, 2004, at 23:33:08
In reply to Re: Feeling Unworthy and unable ..., posted by Brown_cow on January 2, 2004, at 11:31:16
it's good that you have enough self-awareness to *see* this (i.e. see your overwhelming negative self-assesments as thought & feeling rather than fact) - even though it may not make it feel any better. funny how we can watch our minds put us through hell, eh? well, not funny ha-ha. but i know the situation well (such as you described with the dog) - it's like I can watch the whole train of negative thought happening in slo-mo, knowing that my mood and sense of self is about to take a nose dive - and am unable to do anything about it. it seems as though being able to see & understand the problem should be enough to fix the problem - but I guess if it were, I wouldn't be suffering from depression, I'd just be having an off day.
I've been tiptoeing around meditation & have spent a little time in a zen monastery - but haven't thrown myself into it because I know if I really commit to it I won't be able to look away from whatever I find inside, and I don't know if I'm strong enough yet to hack it. I'm glad it's helping you & would be curious to hear a little more about it . . .
-r.
Posted by femlite on January 3, 2004, at 7:23:04
In reply to Re: Feeling Unworthy and unable ..., posted by Brown_cow on January 2, 2004, at 11:31:16
Have you or did you experience any signifigant traumatic events as a child? You dont have to be specific if you care not to. Just interested, as I have similar thought disorders and am an abuse survivor. I think Im ADD and GAD and a half a dozen other things as well, but Im sure the Post Trauma thing is a big factor for me in how I handle "problems"
> I don't know, I do not think my reaction to the dog was really bad at all. A stray dog who is barking and growling and obviously upset is kind of scary. It was the reaction I had to thinking I had not felt sorry for the little dear at the same time which bugged me more.
>
> How we are preceived as people is tied to our survival I guess and I haven't made as much progress towards being independent again after my accident as I want. So I'm thinking my reaction is kind of tied to this little life situation. I'd be upset to find I can't be taken care of anymore because I show upset towards little dogs. :D funny eh
>
> come to think of it, most of the setbacks in my progress have come through emotional upset more than any other cause. I get upset and then feel bound by my own emotions and can't think streight to do schoolwork or dont' have the emotional drive to do exercises. There was a period when anger was a huge factor becasue I was angry at how I got hurt at work and how perceived friends turned on me and other people and things durring a long time of unrest. I finally came to the conclusion that I don't like being being subject to my emotions all the time. So I've started trying meditation with some success.
>
> Well wish you all success.
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