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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by fi on January 21, 2004, at 6:50:15
Hi folks- just helps to share this with people who will understand.
Yesterday I really felt I had run out of the willpower to get through yet another episode, and went to my GP and told them that I was scared to be on my own in case I harmed myself. She arranged a visit to the emergency psychiatric team, who thought that I didnt need admitted to a mainstream admissions ward as such but there is this really nice short term unit... Problem is that they had no beds till Thurs, and now it turns out not then either.
So I am stuck with coping on my own anyway (tho swimming in anxiety now rather than so depressed), with the additional worry that they clearly thought I should be admitted to that unit so maybe they think I'm not safe on my own... I have been given a crisis line- I rang it this morning as I was getting into a state about being admitted or not- and it wasnt working!! Apparently,that's unusual (hope so!)
Now I'm a bit disoriented- I know the best thing is to carry on coping as I would in any other episode, but I have been unnerved by yesterday's drama. Tho I dont feel as at risk today anyway, which is wonderful of course.
I've also rung the Samaritans a couple of times- one was pretty hopeless but the other was great.
Back to getting thru each hour on my own...
Fi
Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2004, at 7:18:24
In reply to crisis/ not getting admitted, posted by fi on January 21, 2004, at 6:50:15
What a rotten situation! I'm glad you're not feeling at risk today, but it is quite wise of you to set up a plan of attack while you're not feeling at risk.
I read someone say that their therapist or pdoc agreed to check in on them on a regular basis in lieu of hospitalization. Would yours be willing to do that? Do you have someone in your support system that would be able to do that? Even if you don't feel comfortable sharing the exact details of why?
Have you cleared your house of all easy methods of self harm?
If worse comes to worse, and you really feel unsafe, my plan was always to hang out around the emergency room, even though I had no intention of trying to check myself in.
There's us, of course, and please do keep posting. But in crisis situations IRL help works better than online.
(If you call the Samaritans and get someone unhelpful, can you call back and try for someone else? Do they have many volunteers at any one time?)
I hope you found something helpful in all this. Really, the state of mental health services is deplorable.
Posted by NikkiT2 on January 21, 2004, at 7:48:55
In reply to crisis/ not getting admitted, posted by fi on January 21, 2004, at 6:50:15
I'm huessing you're in the UK as this sounds SO typical of it. When I had to be admitted I waited 7 days for a bed.. they just don't understand how that wait can be so awful.
Try the Sams again.. you might get someone better.. and I've even turned up at my local office before (on the suggestion of a friend who does it) and they were wonderful when I was there in person.
I find the internet a great distraction when I want to SH.. here are a list of UK self harm websites.. some conatin some really good sitraction techniques.
Bristol Crisis Service for Women http://www.users.zetnet.co.uk/bcsw Info for self-harmers & friends/family
I Cut/Self-Injury http://www.selfinjury.org.uk
Kirsti’s Self Harm Site http://www.selfinjury.freeserve.co.uk Personal Site about Self Harm.
Life Signs http://www.lifesigns.ukf.net
National Self-Harm Network http://www.nshn.co.uk
Papyrus http://www.papyrus-uk.org
Project Spear http://www.projectspear.com Self-help group for people who self-injure
Ruin Your Life http://www.ruinyourlife.com
Self Harm Alliance http://www.selfharmalliance.org
Self-harm support http://www.self-harm.co.uk
Self Injury UK http://www.selfinjury.org.uk
Self-Injury Support - N&E Cumbria http://www.sis-cumbria.co.uk Web site of one of the few local Self-Harm groups in the UK, and certainly the only one in Cumbria!
SIAM http://www.si-am.info (very good in my opinion!)
SIARI http://www.siari.co.uk
Stronger (Self-harm support/discussion board) http://www.members3.boardhost.com/stronger (added 7/9/03)
The Basement Project http://freespace.virgin.net/basement.project Self harm and survivors of abuse
Wounded Wings http://uk.geocities.com/woundedwingsuk
(This was copied and pasted from a charity groups web site I work for.. http://www.borderlineuk.co.uk)Hang in there.. One thing I've learnt is that eventually the worst of times do pass.
Another coping mechanism I have is sleep.. when things get so bad anxiety wise i want to SH (which is when my urges get worst) if I can make myself go to sleep somehow that does help.
Good luck
Nikki x
Posted by Fi on January 21, 2004, at 11:28:42
In reply to Re: crisis/ not getting admitted » fi, posted by NikkiT2 on January 21, 2004, at 7:48:55
Thank you *so much* for your support and practical suggestions (including that great list of links). I did try the Sams again this morning when I had got myself in such a state, and did get a much better person. And hanging around the hospital just in case, and around people, sounds a good idea. I dont have an easy way to self harm anymore, but might make the sharp things less easy to find (I'm living off milk at the moment anyway, so dont need kitchen knives).
I've been very anxious today but not as depressed, so not at risk the same way (phew!), and was assured that the crisis line does usually work... I'm now going for a support session at the centre I was hoping for a bed in tomorrow, and apparently they *may* have a bed on Friday.
Its quite true they seem to have no idea that when you need it, you need it now (or maybe its just a hopeless state of provision- but you dont get left on the pavement outside the hospital with a heart attack, do you?)
Anyway, I mainly wanted to say thank you. And I havent felt like harming myself today- such a huge relief. Maybe I'll get better despite rather than because of the good old NHS!
PS I found out today that it really does work when you are hyperventilating and feeling faint/pins and needles to breathe in and out of a paper bag (or large envelope, in my case- didnt have a paper bag!) For any of you who dont know, you feel like that as you are breathing out too much carbon dioxide. The paper bag holds some of it so you rebreathe it, but also allows plenty of oxygen in too.
Fi
Posted by Fi on January 27, 2004, at 8:31:08
In reply to crisis/ not getting admitted, posted by fi on January 21, 2004, at 6:50:15
Just to say that when finally got help (4 days in crisis unit), it was v helpful. So tho it was excrutiating and undignified pleading for help from the good ol' NHS, with no immediate result, it was worth it in the end. Tho I know I was incredibly lucky to get a bed in the small unit.
Samaritans also continued to be terrific.
Next time I get in this state (so unlikely it will be an 'if' there), I will ask for help sooner and hopefully not feel so overwhelmed when nothing is available at once.
So if anyone else out there is staggering along on their own, hang on in there and things may well get better if you wait just a little longer..
Fi
Posted by gardenergirl on January 27, 2004, at 8:33:26
In reply to Re: crisis/ not getting admitted, posted by Fi on January 27, 2004, at 8:31:08
This is the end of the thread.
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