![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
I haven't felt like this in a very long time. I thought I was doing so well, and then things went haywire last year and I haven't been the same since. I never imagined my life being this way. I feel bad for my husband having to deal with me. He definitely never expected he'd marry someone as screwed up as me. I'm scared that every new med I try now will have some strange side effect on me and I won't be able to take it. I'm constantly checking my mouth out to see if its getting irritated like it did with the last 2 meds I tried. I hate feeling this way and want to cry and stay in bed. I look back at my life and see times when I was so happy and normal, and then wonder how I can be the way I am right now. How does this happen? I hate myself for being like this and wish I wasn't. I'm just so sad.
Posted by sunny10 on May 10, 2005, at 11:32:47
In reply to I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
I am in a bad place right now, too.
I'm sorry that I don't have a lot of support to offer you, but I just wanted to reply to let you know that you are not alone.
I want my old life back, too...
Posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 11:49:43
In reply to Re: I'm so depressed and scared » tampagirl70, posted by sunny10 on May 10, 2005, at 11:32:47
hi sunny - i don't know why people have to deal with depression and OCD and all the other disorders out there. what did we do to deserve this? i'm always trying to find a reason why this is happening to me - is it because i'm unhappy at work or at home or is it just something beyond my control. i SOOO hope my meds work. i can't stand being this way. do you work? are you married and/or have a family?
Posted by sunny10 on May 10, 2005, at 14:46:45
In reply to Re: I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 11:49:43
work full time
divorced from father of my son
separated from current significant other- attempting couples counselling and anger mgmt(for me it is assertiveness training)
I know why this is happening to me- nurture AND nature... come from family of depressives (dna) who were also abusive and neglectful (stepdad and mom, in that order)
As far as deserving?!? All I can say is that I'm thankful for having all of my limbs (in working order) and all of my senses intact...
As far as whether you deserve it because you are unhappy at home and work, I gotta ask you... what came first? The chicken or the egg? I guess it all depends on your perception... Are you unhappy at home or at work because you are chemically depressed? Or have you become chemically depressed because you have been unhappy at home and at work?
There are two theories about depression- and they can co-exist.
One is that some of us are born with neurons that are misfiring or we have non-working (or sub-working) receptors, or both. The job that these neurons do is to regulate our emotions. If we have receptors that don't work right, or we don't produce enough of the neurons themselves, we wind up with depression and/or other types of disorders.
The second theory is that we are born just fine, but prolonged periods of sadness have resulted in misfiring neurons, or neuron chemical suppression.
Either of these things can produce chemical depression (I have simplified this IMMENSELY... feel free to read explanations from other posters who are much more schooled in chemistry than I!)
And then there is "situational depression" which can be helped by therapy alone...(and usually major life changes!)
So know you have MY opinions on this stuff... hopefully others will jump in and give THEIR opinions... That's what we do here!
Just know that you are not alone... we are all in this with you.
sunny10
Posted by anastasia56 on May 10, 2005, at 15:23:23
In reply to I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
most of us here know sad. It's a tangible feeling. I'm sorry you are going thru this right now...it's definately not fun when every day is a struggle. The hope for tomorrow is that although it seems like forever, there is a day out there that you'll find the right med (one without the oral issues you've experienced). Makes all the difference in the world.
ana
Posted by Nettie on May 10, 2005, at 15:37:41
In reply to Re: I'm so depressed and scared, posted by anastasia56 on May 10, 2005, at 15:23:23
Yes I think I know how you feel. Have also tried two different meds without success. Don't know about you, but I find the lowest times are when you come to yet another dead end, with therapy or med or whatever.
Just take one day at a time. If that's too much, just get through one hour, or the next three minutes... You can get through this, and I know you will - remember it's a symptom of your illness to feel so hopeless, it's not reality. Let me know how you're doing :-)
Posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 16:17:26
In reply to Re: I'm so depressed and scared, posted by Nettie on May 10, 2005, at 15:37:41
Thank you all so much for your kind words. I'm so grateful to have found this board.
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 10, 2005, at 21:12:51
In reply to I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
Posted by sunny10 on May 11, 2005, at 9:40:23
In reply to Re:I hope you feel better tampagirl70 and sunny10 (nm), posted by Shy_Girl on May 10, 2005, at 21:12:51
Posted by JenStar on May 12, 2005, at 12:29:52
In reply to I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
I'm so sorry you feel this way. It will get better...it always does, even if it takes time. I totally empathize with you b/c I feel the same way. Sometimes my anxiety is under control, but lately it feels like it's just veering out of my hands. I don't know how to rein it back in. I'm afriad of meds, afraid of side effects, and even more afriad that the meds won't work. It's a scary ride. I hope that both you and I feel back to normal soon. I'm not sure I have advice right now, but I'm sending best wishes your way! Just letting you know that someone out here is wishing you well.
take care,
JenStar
Posted by Nettie on May 14, 2005, at 16:37:44
In reply to Re: I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 16:17:26
Just wondered how you were doing?
Posted by saved1 on June 1, 2005, at 18:06:02
In reply to I'm so depressed and scared, posted by tampagirl70 on May 10, 2005, at 9:48:03
My heart goes out to you. You're not alone. Many of us who have been oppressed with depression have found it to be an ever deepening feeling, like quicksand. I too, have repeatedly checked for signs of adverse reactions. When I finally did work my way off of Prozac, it took over a year for the periodic 'shock waves' to stop happening. (It was like being shocked from the inside out, very wierd, but it's gone now.) I was diagnosed as "clinically depressed" by a doctors assistant a few years back. Looking back now, I realize that while, yes, I was feeling down, it wasn't a permanent thing. We all have our uptimes and downtimes. To automatically dispense brain-chemistry-altering drugs is foolish! I've been off of the drugs now for almost 2 years and have been going fine. Sometimes I'm up, sometimes I'm down, but..as it turns out, THAT'S NORMAL! I did have a major advantage though, I am a Christian and have been for 20 years. What that means is that I had recieved the gift that Jesus Christ promised. The gift was given to those who simply believe in the fact that when He died on a cross and rose from the dead, He did so to make it so we could be accepted by God as though we never had done anything wrong.(Complete forgiveness, Guilt Free!)
I realize now, that the gift He gave is HIM. HE will NEVER leave me nor forsake me, so when I'm down, he's there, when I'm up He's there. I AM NEVER ALONE! And you can have that same free gift. Just ask Him. He's real and He hears your cry. Take care!>
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.