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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Berberis on January 19, 2006, at 13:22:07
Anxiety is overwhelming.
Can't function.
Enough already....of therapy, meds, drs.I don't want to do this anymore.
Posted by wildcard11 on January 19, 2006, at 14:00:00
In reply to Enough, posted by Berberis on January 19, 2006, at 13:22:07
Posted by wildcard11 on January 19, 2006, at 18:43:59
In reply to Enough, posted by Berberis on January 19, 2006, at 13:22:07
Posted by Phillipa on January 19, 2006, at 20:14:13
In reply to Enough, posted by Berberis on January 19, 2006, at 13:22:07
Me either. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 8:39:39
In reply to Can I help? (nm) » Berberis, posted by wildcard11 on January 19, 2006, at 18:43:59
Can you convince me that my friends and family wouldn't be better off without me? After all, we're all gonna die someday and people who love us will grieve then. What's the difference if they grieve now or later? And if they love us, wouldn't they want our suffering to end?
Posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 8:47:27
In reply to Re: Can I help?, posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 8:39:39
No, they wouldn't want you gone before your time and yes, i mean suicide. that leaves so very many scars behind w/ unanswered questions and self blame. What have you tried previous to this low? Meds? and therapy? What is your dx? Trust me, you are NOT alone even though you feel that way. i have been there and even though every doctor, etc. said i would not make it through the night, I DID and although the pain is still here and real, it is better and i am glad i didn't die. Please talk to me. I may not have all the answers but i will listen and be here. Your family obviously loves you and you love them or you would not be worried about 'their' feelings...
Posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 10:22:06
In reply to Re: Can I help? » Berberis, posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 8:47:27
>What have you tried previous to this low? Meds? and therapy? What is your dx?
Meds - almost every SSRI, some TCI's, SNRI's (almost all but MAOI's), benzos, beta blockers (to name a few).
Therapy - too much and with different therapists. Alot of blah, blah, blah and gets me nowhere.
DX - take your pick...bipolar II, bipolar NOS, anxiety disorder, depression. Who the h*ll knows.> Trust me, you are NOT alone even though you feel that way.
You honestly believe that? We're ALL alone. No one else can take away our pain; no one else can share our pain; no one else can really know how we feel; and NO ONE can save us.
>i have been there and even though every doctor, etc. said i would not make it through the night, I DID and although the pain is still here and real, it is better and i am glad i didn't die.
I'm glad you didn't die too. I'm sorry that you're still suffering though. What is the limit to what you can stand? Do you have more good days than bad? I also survived a suicide attempt but can't say I'm happy about it.
>Please talk to me. I may not have all the answers but i will listen and be here. Your family obviously loves you and you love them or you would not be worried about 'their' feelings...
I do love my family and I know they love me. But because of me, they suffer also and that's why I think they'd be better off without me.
But I have no plan. I'm calling my pdoc and see what options are left. For now, I'm not giving up.
Posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 10:34:24
In reply to Still not convinced » wildcard11, posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 10:22:06
We are never alone. I think that at times having no family but deep in my heart i just cannot accept we are alone. Too many people care, even if they are strangers to us IRL. Of all the meds you mentioned, did any help more than others? Have you ever had a good T? That makes a world of difference. They are hard to find but not impossible. I'm glad you are calling your pdoc. My dx is severe depressive d/o, severe general/social anxiety and PTSD and CBT therapy and a combo of Effexor/Wellbutrin (for energy) and klonopin has helped the most. I'm not doing great but I can get out of bed which is huge for me. Paxil also helped me years ago but that was before the PTSD so??? I know this will be hard for you to believe but I care about you. That proves you are not alone. Your family cares about you~you are not alone. Your pain may hurt them but just stop and think how YOU would feel if someone you loved ended their life? Would you be relieved for them or hurt wishing they had tried again and that maybe the next time the trying would pay off...I am always here..
Posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 10:55:48
In reply to Re: Still not convinced » Berberis, posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 10:34:24
An elderly family member is in chronic pain and she's so anxious and depressed, she's not really living now anyway. I would totally understand if she wanted to take her own life. I would miss her but know that she's no longer suffering.
Posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 11:01:23
In reply to Re: Still not convinced » wildcard11, posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 10:55:48
I can understand (I'm not saying it is *right* for everyone to see it this way) situations like 'Million Dollar Baby' (movie) but not when there is hope, and it just has not been found yet. With so much new technology and medicines and docs learning more each day on how the brain functions, there is hope. It is just hard to see when you're in a dark tunnel to see the light.
Posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 11:36:25
In reply to Re: Still not convinced » Berberis, posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 11:01:23
> I can understand (I'm not saying it is *right* for everyone to see it this way) situations like 'Million Dollar Baby' (movie) but not when there is hope, and it just has not been found yet. With so much new technology and medicines and docs learning more each day on how the brain functions, there is hope. It is just hard to see when you're in a dark tunnel to see the light.
Even in this dark tunnel, I know that what you say is true. But again, how much is enough?
Thank you sincerely, Wildcard.
Posted by wildcard11 on January 20, 2006, at 11:39:22
In reply to Re: Still not convinced » wildcard11, posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 11:36:25
but i still fight (sigh) and it hurts like hell. (((hugs)))
Posted by ClearSkies on January 20, 2006, at 11:45:01
In reply to Still not convinced » wildcard11, posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 10:22:06
I hope you called your pdoc - are you able to get in?
I have to say with my limited experience that getting the medications right made me feel much better. At which point I became more useful in therapy.
When it's not working, it feels horrible and can't seem much worse. When I'm more aware of how the medications are - or aren't - working properly, I have a greater appreciation of the biological components of anxiety and depression. My situation can remain unchanged yet I can feel wildly different about it. Hopeful to hopeless, with not much in between.I wanted you to know that I'm here, too.
Posted by Berberis on January 20, 2006, at 13:34:54
In reply to Re: Still not convinced » Berberis, posted by ClearSkies on January 20, 2006, at 11:45:01
Thank you, Clearskies, for your words of support.
I'm feeling better this afternoon. This morning I was crying in the ladies room here at work...I was so depressed. Yesterday I was nothing but a ball of anxiety. This may be rapid cycling. It's happened before. Waiting for callback from pdoc.
This is the end of the thread.
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