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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2006, at 22:32:12
This week at work was kind of stressful. There is one chic I work with the most, other than my boss - we're both under her. She is very sweet, from South Carolina like some people I know, which made me feel good about her. She know's very little about computers, but knows ALOT about the business we work in, so we can help each other.
So anyway, we were given this assignment to update some pages that go on the internet. She hands me this page and says this image has to be changed. So I say okay, where is the Quark document located? She didn't know. Okay, so after searching and not finding it I think, maybe I can reproduce it and ask "Where are the images?" She didn't know. I'm like o-o-okay, so I have to update these pages, I have no document and no images, and she has no idea what I'm talking about. Of course KnowItAllGirl who I'm replacing wasn't there, and given the disorganization and ineptitude I'd run into so far, I do the only thing I can think of and reproduce all the pages from scratch as best I can. We work for three days on this.KnowItAllGirl girl was back the second day, but I didn't want to go to her since she ridicules my abilities every chance she gets. However, after realizing we were never going to finish, and questioning the quality of the finished product, we finally go to her and she berates us for not coming to her sooner. After asking repeatedly why we didn't, I eventually tell her the reason why I didn't come to her was because I felt like she would ridicule me if I asked a question. She's pretty upset by this, and later when we were talking to my supervisor, she makes a comment about how she has one person that trembles every time she speaks to her (meaning me). I didn't want to get into it in front of my boss, so I didn't say anything, but I was fuming. I was like, I'm not scared of you you arrogant bitch! I just don't want to deal with your drama! Of course I just said this to myself.
Well anyway, she ends up helping us both out, NOT without being irritating. But I can tell she's TRYING, and nothing else effects me as much as someone actually trying, so I do my best to make thinks go smoothly and thank her for her help. At the end of the day she comes by my cubicle and tells me I need to go home (my supervisor had told us to take off early because of all our hard work - she had already left for the day). So, KnowItAllGirl girl waits there until I turned of my computer, gather my things, and then she walks out with me. She was obviously trying to be nice, so of course I was nice back.
All this actually has nothing to do with being the 'same old me'. That came into play when I got all paranoid thinking S.CarolinaChic and my boss were upset with and avoiding me. I actually found myself thinking, "Well I'm just not going to speak to them and see how long it takes them to speak to me". Minutes later I'm like, "What am I doing????" Its just so hard to let go of the paranioa! S.CarolinaChic later tells me she had a severe case of PMS that day, and it was a very bad day for her. When will the suspicion stop though! When will I be confident enough to know I've done my best no matter what anybody thinks, and that's enough!
So that's my complaint for this week. I really just needed to vent and get it out. I hate when I find myself falling back into old patterns.
-T
Posted by crazy teresa on August 13, 2006, at 22:55:50
In reply to I found myself being the same old me, posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2006, at 22:32:12
You spoke up, stood up for yourself and told her the truth. I see that as GREAT progress! You managed to do all those things and it worked out for the best. THAT'S HUGE!!!
Posted by llrrrpp on August 14, 2006, at 10:33:14
In reply to NOT the same old patterns! » TexasChic, posted by crazy teresa on August 13, 2006, at 22:55:50
Hey Tex,
Whatever you told the irritating superknowitall hit her exactly as it should have. Not only was she able to help you finish your project, but she is now treating you more humanely. This is outstanding. You can't change her personality, but you have been very successful at changing the quality of how she interacts with you. Good work.South Carolina girl no doubt knows the limitations of her computer expertise. She won't hold a grudge against you, especially if she's nice, as you say.
Just take it easy, go with the flow. The paranoia will resolve itself when you realize that things have changed for the better.
-ll
Posted by Phillipa on August 14, 2006, at 14:19:46
In reply to Re: NOT the same old patterns!, posted by llrrrpp on August 14, 2006, at 10:33:14
Good for you T you stood up for yourself. Love Phillipa
Posted by wildcardII on August 14, 2006, at 14:50:04
In reply to I found myself being the same old me, posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2006, at 22:32:12
Posted by TexasChic on August 14, 2006, at 18:44:53
In reply to NOT the same old patterns! » TexasChic, posted by crazy teresa on August 13, 2006, at 22:55:50
I guess I was doing that selective awareness thing. All I saw was the negative instead of recognizing the positive. Thanks for pointing it out to me yall.
-T
Posted by TexasChic on August 14, 2006, at 19:04:36
In reply to us S.Carolina chics are sweet...lol :-) (nm) » TexasChic, posted by wildcardII on August 14, 2006, at 14:50:04
Its so funny, I found myself talking like her today. I've always done that, I seem to take on the accent of the people around me. I do the same thing when I visit my friends in East TX. I guess its because as a kid we moved around so much and I had to pick up the accent real quick in order to fit in.
She call's me 'little bit' and says things like she got 'tickled' about something. I just think its so cute. Most people don't realize your accent is more twangy than ours.
-T
Posted by TexasChic on August 15, 2006, at 17:50:21
In reply to Re: us S.Carolina chics are sweet...lol :-) » wildcardII, posted by TexasChic on August 14, 2006, at 19:04:36
Anytime we can't find something in her old files, which are now mine, its because 'I' screwed it up! Arg!!! She said this today and stormed off, leaving me without the file I needed. I finally found it, but I was fuming. I said something to SCarolinaGirl, and she just said, "I know, I'm sorry, I just don't know any way to advise you about the situation." For some reason that made me madder, and I kept thinking, if only I knew this girl couldn't jepordize my job, I think I would be able to let it go. But that's all I can think when she starts in like this. My supervisor is on vacation for the week. I came very close to calling he and asking just that.
Well, a few hours later she came over and kept talking and asking me questions when I was trying to meet a deadline. But I could tell she was trying to make nice, so I was but nice back (although a little reserved).
The only thing I can think of to do is turn it around. The files really are messed up, it just wasn't me that did it. So I thought I would ask her to help me organize them. Does that sound like a good idea? Its the only thing I can think of. I hope I don't screw things up worse.
-T
Posted by ClearSkies on August 15, 2006, at 23:37:43
In reply to Oooh, KnowItAllGirl really pissed me off today!, posted by TexasChic on August 15, 2006, at 17:50:21
> The only thing I can think of to do is turn it around. The files really are messed up, it just wasn't me that did it. So I thought I would ask her to help me organize them. Does that sound like a good idea? Its the only thing I can think of. I hope I don't screw things up worse.
>
> -T
The only thing harder than starting a new job is working alongside the person you are replacing. I know it sounds like a great idea, transferring knowledge and the ins and outs, but I have found it very unnerving the few times I've had to do it. I've felt that the person training me was trying to make the job more complex and difficult that it really is; and at the same time, make themselves feel superior with all the knowledge they are tasked with passing on.In many ways it's easier to be left up to my own learning on the job; that way I've been able to make it my own from the very start.
Just think about the freedom you'll have once your predecessor actually proceeds on her merry little way!
CS
This is the end of the thread.
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