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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by LJRen on November 2, 2006, at 23:43:59
(Oops, accidently posted this in Relationships, and meant to post it here in Social.)
Having a bum day here. Wanting to call my friend up for comfort but can't b/c we're on a 6 month no communication hiatus. http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/698782.html
(Although we've exchanged just a couple of short emails this week so that he could assist me with my wireless internet hookup. Had things been okay between us, he would've been here to do it himself.)In less than an hour I have to leave for another dreaded day of work. I hate going there so much. The whole working for a living seems so pointless to me if you can't find something you really like to do. You spend so much time there, you practically live there. And all so you can make money to provide for necessaties in life just so you can continue to go back to work everyday. And as is the case for most folks I think, you barely make enough to get by, so extra money for things like vacations is hardly heard of - at least it is for me. Plus, one or two weeks vacation out of a year hardly makes up for all the countless drudgery of hours your have to put in the rest of the year. How does everyone do this without going mad? I've been asking this question ever since I graduated college. I hate this. I'm miserable every damn day with every job I take. I just want to stay at home where it's safe & noone can bother me. I'm so sour when I get to work. I usually end up crying on my way home from work. People there are always telling me to smile or something like that. I wish they would just mind their own business and leave me alone. Why does everyone want to change me? I've been trying to do that myself for years to no avail.
Well, gotta run. Prison calls.
Ren
Posted by Dinah on November 3, 2006, at 9:31:48
In reply to Daily drugery sucks, posted by LJRen on November 2, 2006, at 23:43:59
Not a day goes by that I don't wonder why on earth I do this to myself.
Posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2006, at 9:45:42
In reply to It does indeed. » LJRen, posted by Dinah on November 3, 2006, at 9:31:48
Staying home is worse. I'd love to be able to work again and feel worthwhile. Love Phillipa
Posted by LJRen on November 3, 2006, at 10:44:07
In reply to Re: It does indeed., posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2006, at 9:45:42
> Staying home is worse. I'd love to be able to work again and feel worthwhile. Love Phillipa
I'm sorry that's the way it is for you. I guess the grass is always greener, eh? lol
I never thought about feeling worthwhile b/c I'm able to go out and work. Having to work only makes me feel like crap b/c I can't find anything I like doing 40+ hours a week other than sleep.
It probably wouldn't be so bad if this stupid "depression vision" didn't limit my perspective of the world & myself so much. Instead of rose colored glasses, I've got gray colored glasses and I can't see anything for what it truly is to save my life.
Oh, but this week is even better b/c we have manadatory overtime. They have the nerve to take away one of our measly two free days AND count it against us if we don't show up. This sucks.
Ren
Posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2006, at 18:06:23
In reply to Re: It does indeed. » Phillipa, posted by LJRen on November 3, 2006, at 10:44:07
I'm sorry you have to work this weekend that would bum me out too. As when I worked I had steady hours and if I wanted to work more I could. And it's true what you say about sleeping and seeing the world as grey. I too am depressed and if someone told me I had to get up early every day . I couldn't do it. I worked 3-ll. Only way I ever could work. Love Phillipa
Posted by LJRen on November 3, 2006, at 23:38:35
In reply to Re: It does indeed. » LJRen, posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2006, at 18:06:23
Ironic...I'm working second shift now...3-11pm. It's the only way I can manage to survive this job right now. If I had to be there 7am-3, I would've had to quit w/n the first month. Unfortunately, tomorrow they're only keeping the plant open until 3pm and they want us to put in at least 6 hours OT so we're required to be back there in the morning by 9am.
Oh, and we're primarily only going to be cleaning tomorrow b/c some bigwig is coming to visit next week. I made my disapproval of the situation very known at our opening shift meeting. It still pisses me off that some big fat cat who gets paid God knows how much doesn't have enough sense to realize the place is a freakin factory and isn't meant to be 'sp*c&span'.
Grrrrr, I hate corporate America.
Ren
Posted by LJRen on November 4, 2006, at 21:15:51
Having a bum day here. Wanting to call my friend up for comfort but can't b/c we're on a 6 month no communication hiatus. http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/698782.html
(Although we've exchanged just a couple of short emails this week so that he could assist me with my wireless internet hookup. Had things been okay between us, he would've been here to do it himself.)In less than an hour I have to leave for another dreaded day of work. I hate going there so much. The whole working for a living seems so pointless to me if you can't find something you really like to do. You spend so much time there, you practically live there. And all so you can make money to provide for necessaties in life just so you can continue to go back to work everyday. And as is the case for most folks I think, you barely make enough to get by, so extra money for things like vacations is hardly heard of - at least it is for me. Plus, one or two weeks vacation out of a year hardly makes up for all the countless drudgery of hours your have to put in the rest of the year. How does everyone do this without going mad? I've been asking this question ever since I graduated college. I hate this. I'm miserable every damn day with every job I take. I just want to stay at home where it's safe & noone can bother me. I'm so sour when I get to work. I usually end up crying on my way home from work. People there are always telling me to smile or something like that. I wish they would just mind their own business and leave me alone. Why does everyone want to change me? I've been trying to do that myself for years to no avail.
Well, gotta run. Prison calls.
Ren
Posted by LJRen on November 4, 2006, at 21:52:34
In reply to Daily drudgery sucks!, posted by LJRen on November 2, 2006, at 13:01:21
Posted by Jost on November 4, 2006, at 22:06:13
In reply to Daily drudgery sucks!, posted by LJRen on November 2, 2006, at 13:01:21
Hi, LJRen.
Could be that Bob or one of the deputies thought this topic belonged and might get more responses on this board.
Every so often, a thread that I've posted to is redirected (ie reposted on another part of Pbabble)-- and I temporarily think I've lost my mind, because I think it's a new post, that I don't remember.
How was work? did you get through the night. I take it you work at night.
Is there a job you could do, or prepare to do-- through classes, or other training-- that you'd enjoy more?
If your work makes you this unhappy, can you give thought to how it could be better? Dreading something so central to your existence is a hard burden, and drains you dry.
I'm sure it's touch not having your friend to talk to. Are there any other people you've thought of reaching out to?
By the way, what did you study in college? How long since you graduated?
Jost
Posted by Phillipa on November 4, 2006, at 22:20:49
In reply to Re: Daily drudgery sucks!, posted by Jost on November 4, 2006, at 22:06:13
Maybe you repeated the thread as it's such a horrible thought to have to go to work. I want to work but can't and that makes me angry. Oh well. Good luck on the job. Don't you have Sunday off? Love Phillipa
Posted by LJRen on November 5, 2006, at 11:50:53
In reply to Re: Daily drudgery sucks!, posted by Jost on November 4, 2006, at 22:06:13
Hey Jost,
I had accidently posted that msg in the Relationships board a few days ago. So I entered a (nm) reply to it saying 'oops, meant for Social' and went ahead and copied it here that day. Then it appeared again in Social last night, I guess like you said, Dr. Bob or deputies having moved it over b/c only my (nm) reply post is now back in Relationships. I'm still getting used to how things work around here.
Oh, I get through each night's work somehow, no matter how long it takes. I'm convinced now more than ever my problem is primarily due to medication that doesn't do all that I need it to.
I graduated in '95 with a bachelor's in computer engineering. Started with an outside sales engineering job for 6 months, went to programming for a couple years, considered computer graphics, got fired from 3 computer jobs in a 1 year period (last one being a computer training type job). That's when I took a major step down in pay and started working meanial jobs like admin asst., waitressing, valeting, retail, and now factory machine operator. I am the world's worst people person so the waitressing/valeting/retail jobs were absolute hell on me.
But basically everywhere I've been, everything I've done, I end up feeling the same way...bored out of my mind and lifeless on the inside. I can't find something I want to do 40+ hours a week, so being forced to do anything that repetively that I don't really care about always ends up leaving me thinking what's it all worth. We spend soooooo much of our life just working. And b/c my meds don't quite do their job, I don't enjoy life much inside or outside of work. I feel cursed.
The funny/sad thing is, this territory is so familiar to me. I know this place by heart. It's practically home, which is comforting and scary at the same time. I wonder if I ever will get out of this hell. And if perchance that I do get out, when will it be? How much more of my life has to be wasted & lost before I get to enjoy it?
Anyway, thanks for the interest Jost.
Ren
This is the end of the thread.
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