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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TexasChic on November 30, 2006, at 20:04:50
So, does anyone else have a problem with blurting out personal stuff to people? Its like I don't know where to draw the line until I've gone past it. I noticed this has been the cause of problems in the past. I reveal a weakness and then it gets used against me. Like when I revealed to someone my anxiety problems, and then later this person questioned my ability to do my job because of it.
I've made a conscious effort not to reveal too much at my new job, because work seems to be where this trait causes me the most trouble. My recent slip was, in discussing my attempt to get a new apartment close to work, I told my coworker that my credit is bad and I really need to file bankruptcy. She had such a shocked look on her face I was like, oh crap, why did I say that.
I didn't realize how bad I was about it until I tried to stop doing it. And I didn't realize how much trouble this has been causing me until I started thinking about it.
So I guess my question is does anybody else do this? And if so, any ideas about the psychological reason behind it?
-T
Posted by LJRen on December 1, 2006, at 0:22:35
In reply to Sharing too much information, posted by TexasChic on November 30, 2006, at 20:04:50
Yes, TxChic, I too share too much too easily or specifically too soon in relationships. I've determined that it is due to a lack of personal boundaries. In fact, it wasn't until a few years ago I had even heard of boundaries. And since then it's still a concept I often forget to put into practice. For whatever reason, my parents failed to instill this much needed protection habit in me.
Now I don't go around telling people my bank account number or important business stuff like that. But I guess what some people would consider intimate personal information just comes right on out with hardly a thought of who I'm telling it to. And I know I've done it in the past in hopes of forging a fast, close friendship. Thinking that if I open up to them, they'll open up to me. But most people out there were instilled with boundaries and when someone they barely know bares all so quickly it really freaks them out b/c they don't understand why that person has exposed so much. And the typical subsequent reaction to freaking out is running away. Hence, I've personally experienced a lot of rejection. Not fun.
Being a little older now, I try to stay a more aware of what I say to folks. But I probably still let it out too easily that I suffer from depression. For some reason I feel the need to explain my withdrawn, somber behavior to people. I guess I'd rather them know the truth than think I'm being aloof.
Anyway, I hope this helps a little.
Take care,
Ren
Posted by TexasChic on December 1, 2006, at 12:20:03
In reply to Re: Sharing too much information » TexasChic, posted by LJRen on December 1, 2006, at 0:22:35
Yes, that helps alot! My early family life had NO boundries. At all. I don't know why I didn't put that together. I'm always telling my Mom, "too much information", but it didn't occur to me that I was acctually following her example. Its very disturbing when I find out I'm acting like my mother, but I guess its better than going around oblivious to it. At least I know what to work on now. Thanks!
-T
Posted by LJRen on December 2, 2006, at 19:30:52
In reply to Re: Sharing too much information, posted by TexasChic on December 1, 2006, at 12:20:03
This is the end of the thread.
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