![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by saturn on March 30, 2007, at 14:59:08
I have the opportunity to help a good friend get a badly needed job. I can't guarantee it, but I could give them a very helpful advantage by mentioning his name or just by simply giving him the heads-up that the position is available.
But I am always reminded of the edict "No good deed goes unpunished".
I have worked with my friend professionally. He is hard-working and talented. He also has a propensity toward being late and sometimes "misunderstood". He may fit in perfectly, and I would definitely deem him professional, but I cannot know for sure that problems may not arise.
Here are my options:
A. Do nothing, say Nothing: If I choose this, eventually my friend will learn that I had the opportunity to help but in fact did not. This is inevitable.
B. If I even just tell my friend of the position, I will invariably be asked for my professional assessment of them, which puts me in a difficult spot in terms of what to say. Then if he becomes hired and there are any problems, this will reflect upon me.
Lose-Lose Situation?
I always appreciate bouncing ideas off other babblers. Any insight would be greatly appreciated. Thanks...Peace...Saturn.
Posted by Fivefires on March 30, 2007, at 16:39:09
In reply to Help a friend (or not)?, posted by saturn on March 30, 2007, at 14:59:08
Help.
U aren't responsible for anything which might come up.
So you know the person has had some difficulties. U don't know specifics.
If it came back at u, which it definitely shouldn't, but could(?), 'u had no knowledge of specific probs'.
5f
Posted by Phillipa on March 30, 2007, at 21:00:50
In reply to Re: Help a friend (or not)? » saturn, posted by Fivefires on March 30, 2007, at 16:39:09
Saturn that's a tough one. It sounds like a Catch 22. Love Phillipa
Posted by Kath on April 2, 2007, at 12:56:03
In reply to Help a friend (or not)?, posted by saturn on March 30, 2007, at 14:59:08
Hi Saturn - is it possible to tell the friend about the position & then, when you are asked to give your opinion of the friend, to say that since this is a personal friend, you can't give an objective opinion & would prefer not to???
If it's possible to do this, the only disadvantage I can think of is that if your friend were to behave badly, would that reflect badly on you in that they were your personal friend?
Difficult situation! hugs, Kath
Posted by saturn on April 11, 2007, at 14:20:55
In reply to Re: Help a friend (or not)? » saturn, posted by Kath on April 2, 2007, at 12:56:03
> Hi Saturn - is it possible to tell the friend about the position & then, when you are asked to give your opinion of the friend, to say that since this is a personal friend, you can't give an objective opinion & would prefer not to???
>
> If it's possible to do this, the only disadvantage I can think of is that if your friend were to behave badly, would that reflect badly on you in that they were your personal friend?
>
> Difficult situation! hugs, KathThanks for the input Kath. It turned out literally while I had the phone in my hand to contact my friend that I found out the position was filled. Talk about a test! I greatly appreciate your insight. Thanks again...Peace...Saturn.
Posted by Kath on April 14, 2007, at 12:59:57
In reply to Re: Help a friend (or not)? » Kath, posted by saturn on April 11, 2007, at 14:20:55
Wow - how's that for the Universe taking care of things!!
I feel like I keep getting tests & challenges thrown at me!
Hugs, Kath
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.