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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on May 2, 2009, at 17:52:51
I have *such* a strong urge to call Daddy. He used to bring me to the track, and we watched the Kentucky Derby every year.
I really miss him.
But what an exciting finish!
Posted by Gabbette on May 2, 2009, at 19:10:39
In reply to What a race!, posted by Dinah on May 2, 2009, at 17:52:51
Well I'm glad you enjoyed the race, I've never seen it.
But it can leave you feeling like a quote out of context*
when you go to tell the only other person you know who would "get it" and then the realization hits. I'm sorry.
I think you should tell him anyway, he probably had a much better view than you did.* Ben Folds
Posted by Dinah on May 3, 2009, at 8:49:05
In reply to Re: What a race! » Dinah, posted by Gabbette on May 2, 2009, at 19:10:39
I like to think so...
I talk to him every day, but sometimes I long for something a bit more tangible. And reciprocal. (Although the Daddy in my head yells at me a lot less than the real thing.)
I topped off the experience by yelling at my mother. Well, arguing with her in tones that approached screeching. Sigh. I tried to put politics off the list of accepted topics between us, but I think that's her whole life these days.
I should be concerned about her, I guess. And certainly compassionate. It's hard because it isn't a sudden shift. It's a move to the extreme of a lifetime of fringe political beliefs. Foaming at the mouth, conspiracy.com, beliefs. But she does seem to be getting worse. It's hard not to yell when someone keeps talking about something as fact that simply is not true. A purely factual sort of thing, not open to interpretation.
I should be compassionate. But I get angry that she tries to suck me in.
Posted by Phillipa on May 3, 2009, at 12:46:57
In reply to Re: What a race! » Gabbette, posted by Dinah on May 3, 2009, at 8:49:05
Dinah don't know of you Mom but know of your talking about the close relationship with you Dad and nothing wrong with talking to him. Love Phillipa
Posted by gabbette on May 5, 2009, at 18:08:15
In reply to Re: What a race! » Gabbette, posted by Dinah on May 3, 2009, at 8:49:05
> I should be compassionate. But I get angry that she tries to suck me in.
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh
What is that? My mom does that too, and there is no satisfactory response but heartfelt agreement.
Humour, no.
"well I guess I see it differently" gets"Well when you're my age you'll realize how silly you're being.."
Yes, and that's with facts.. it makes me want to get out the charts and the graphs..
Which I did at one time, then I had to deal with her months later, quoting me back to me as if she was bestowing her knowledge upon me.
Simple acknowledgment?
"I can tell you're not really listening to me"And the same topics keep being brought up.
Sometimes I would just walk in the door and she'll start in on something.
Very few people have the talent to leave me parched and frustrated in less than ten minutes..I haven't seen my mom in three years, we only just started emailing recently, and that's okay because part of the problem was the facial expressions she made. Lots of smirking and eye rolling..
I have wondered even if the dalai lama's mother
ever told him she thought the invasion of Tibet
was a good thing.
Posted by Dinah on May 5, 2009, at 18:28:30
In reply to Re: What a race! » Dinah, posted by gabbette on May 5, 2009, at 18:08:15
:)
I think there's no way to head her off about these things. I called her to apologize for yelling, and every time I brought up any topic at all, she twisted it to politics. Sigh.
She was such a great mom when I was very little.
The odd part is that I have the strongest urge to congratulate you for reestablishing a relationship with your mother, while simultaneously thinking that adult children should sometimes enter the witness protection program.
Posted by gabbette on May 5, 2009, at 19:24:26
In reply to Re: What a race! » gabbette, posted by Dinah on May 5, 2009, at 18:28:30
LOL!
Yes, oh that would be such a break.
Part of what perplexes me, is that she
told me that she didn't find me likeable,
well okay, my sister and I were teasing her because my little sister has always been so obviously the favourite, my sister knows she was treated far better than I was and even remembers that she used to manipulate it so that I'd get in trouble, because she knew my mom would always believe her, and my mom was vicious.
Her acknowledging that is probably why she and I managed to stay so close.Anyway, my mom said
"Well some children are likeable, some aren't"
She's told me she wished she didn't have me, and it wasn't said in anger, just as if it was a converstation..
She really doesn't seem to like me at all, so why then, is she hurt when I don't visit?If it wasn't the famlly dynamic, it would be funny.
Posted by Dinah on May 5, 2009, at 22:03:54
In reply to Re: What a race! » Dinah, posted by gabbette on May 5, 2009, at 19:24:26
Egads! That may be just a bit too much honesty on her part.
And to blame it on you! "Well some children are likeable, some aren't" What a very silly statement. Some kids are undoubtedly a better fit for some parents than others. But to say that some kids are unlikeable is just ridiculous.
Although I have the strong urge to say that some mothers are clearly more likeable than others. Or clearly have more capacity for love than others.
But you, my dear Gabbi Gabbi, are undeniably likable. So clearly your mom's meter needs some calibration.
This is the end of the thread.
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