Posted by BarbaraCat on October 5, 2002, at 1:31:23
In reply to Can an Acid Trip cause severe depression?, posted by Jefff on October 3, 2002, at 16:08:56
I'm curious, did these symtpoms start after acid in general, or only after having a bad trip? Here are my theories on a subject I'm all too acquainted with. LSD and other psychedelics affect the serotonin system so it's likely that we've messed with something in the chemical neighborhood of our depressions. Whether or not it's permanent is anybody's guess, just like no one knows whether taking antidepressants permanently affect the brain's structure.
I have done acid, mescaline, psilocybin, mushrooms, MDA, MDMA (are there any left?) many, many times. I lived through the 60's, went to Woodstock and was a proper hippie chick. I had mostly wonderful mind-opening transformational experiences, but a handful that were nightmarish, horrific. The worst of my blackest depressions are like these bad trips and I wonder if my psyche and brain 'learned how to be depressed' from these frightening and traumatically real fantasies.
I think that traumatic incidents, whether drug induced or otherwise, carve chemical grooves into our wiring. Our brains and bodies don't differentiate between the real or imagined horrors. Trauma kindles the amygdala, the fear center in our brain, and once this pathway is carved, the route becomes all too familiar. Although I wonder about my drug experiences being the cause of my brain's sensitivity, my father was depressed in the same horrific way. He seemed to be on a lifelong bad trip, without any help from drugs. He very rarely drank and did not take medicine of any kind. Nine kids in his family and 5 suffered from the same thing. However, they all had a very dysfunctional and traumatic upbringing, and my father continued his legacy with me. Trauma is trauma. So the jury's still out for me as to whether or not I'd have the same difficulties had I not had indulged. I probably would, but without the colorful insights and transcendent experiences for which I am very grateful. Whatever, I sure didn't need drop quite so much. - Barbara
poster:BarbaraCat
thread:122163
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020930/msgs/122405.html