Posted by alexandra_k on August 31, 2018, at 22:08:10
In reply to Re: alexandra, posted by ert on August 31, 2018, at 13:58:53
> You will not be able to release your label
That's right. So there is an element of my needing to face up to it, or be upfront about it, in the present. Instead of living in fear about when people will find out about my past / living in fear about whether they know about my past already.
There are people who like to prey on other people's weaknesses. Like how my Mother often liked to prey on mine, there are quite a lot of people like that. Those seeking to gain any advantage they can for themselves. If they can induce shame or guilt or fear in me, that makes it easier for them to control me. You gotta be able to stare them directly in the eyes and be like 'huh? what?' till they move along... Sometimes it's just about testing. People want to test you and see if they can upset you / get you to lash out / get you all riled up. I guess because they think that if they can get you to do those things then you won't be much use when they are feeling those things and those things are induced in you by... Induction. I guess I remember testing people... Testing clinicians... Genuinely hoping they would pass my tests and be a source of... Stability. More often than not they failed, however.
They failed. Do I belive I'd do a genuinely better job of it than of many of them? Yes. I do. Do I believe I'll every be as good as some of them? I can only hope. And work really hard.
> and you can be prone to flashbacks or risks.
Maybe. I guess. Sure. But everybody has got their issues. Or, if they don't, then it's unclear whether they have the experiences to understand a little of where the citizens of the health system may be coming from. The issue is in how I respond to those flashbacks or risks.
In NZ we are fond of saying that victims make persecuters. We were doing this government thing which involved identifying high risk victims. The infants of people who were Maaori, had been incarcirated, where transient / didn't stay put in their slum and so on. Putting a little label on those kids so we knew who to target to fill up our prison population down the track. We put a stop to it. Or, we put a stop to telling the public that that was what the government was doing. But there is a great deal of pressure from the government and other sources... To make sure that the great majority of people don't ever recover from being raised in poverty, yeah. I think those who are most ashamed of that... Who do most of what they can to hide that or forget that or not allow it to impact on them... Are those most likely to persecute. I'm talking about the government officials and so on who were raised in State Houses (for example) who went on to sell them off (to themselves) to keep them as slums so that people can be raised worse than they were.
Maybe I'm wrong... I'd rather be wrong. I'd rather people turn out to be... Better than I think they are. But I think my life has gone rather more badly than it should have because I trusted and assumed that people were better. That's a sad truth.
> Personally I would not care other people delete or leave hold because it is their own wish and I would not want to coerce somebody into doing something. Mileage may vary from age, gender, life situation this is besides what laws say
I guess. If Bob decided to pull the boards down, then I don't suppose I'd oppose that. But I think I would feel sad for it. I would grieve for it, somewhat. I like what he chose to do with the writing board. Archiving it. It is still there, but sort of nearer the back of the shelf. That's different from the fires of storage. I don't know.
How are you doing? What is the weather doing in your part of the world? How have natural disasters being treating you? Can you tell me something nice about your day?
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1100606
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20151112/msgs/1100732.html