Posted by Lindenblüte on September 30, 2006, at 9:37:55
In reply to Re: trying to keep SI promise to myself **trigger*, posted by Meri-Tuuli on September 30, 2006, at 9:07:51
Yes,
I have felt that way before. That is how I have justified my little hangnail pickings and stuff like that over the years.The problem for me is that the SI is becoming more and more of a daily ritual. Occupying at least 30-60 minutes a day on a normal day. And on an abnormal day, well... I cannot see that as some adaptive mechanism. If I'm trying to numb myself and keep me going on a steady stream of beta-endorphins, well, I might as well get a script from the pdoc, and save myself some scarring or infections, huh?
Maybe the SI on an abnormal day is seen as preferable to drinking myself into a stupor, going on a walk in the middle of the night in my urban neighborhood, attempting suicide or whatever other "escape" I can fathom. That's entirely possible. I wish it didn't have to come to that.
Thanks for your input, though, Meri-Tuuli. I'm happy to hear from Finland. Are you feeling finnish right now? enjoying the last few days after the Autumn equinox?
-Li
poster:Lindenblüte
thread:690265
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20060921/msgs/690472.html