Posted by sid on May 21, 2002, at 22:56:48
In reply to Re: Sexual harrassment/abuse/humour » sid, posted by Dinah1 on May 21, 2002, at 19:06:35
Hi Dinah,
I'm tired of therapy, but at the same time, that's not something meds will solve for me. It's not my brain biochemistry that's the problem here, it's my BOL.
Cost-benefits? As an economist I usually think in those terms... I guess I wanted to hear about others' experiences and see what their advice would be.
It's financially costly (I don't have insurance coverage fo it), it takes time, there's no guaranteed success, it can even hurt more than help, etc. I figure though if I can talk to someone specialized in sexual harrassment/abuse, then I'd have better chances of success. I'm fine in most areas of my life now, this is really the one last thing (and the person) that ruins the party for me.
Rationally, I know men are not all like that. At the same time, I don't even want to take a chance to find out about any specific individual. I'm so "marked" by it that I'd rather forego the option of even getting to know men. In a social setting, I stick around with the women, when there are men around, I don't feel safe. Only now am I realizing how much this is having an impact on my life. I feel I can't go on like this. I don't want to be this person. Overall I'm happy with myself, but this part of myself is so ugly.
Well, thanks Dinah. I'll talk to my doc (the one who thinks I have BPD), make it clear what my actual problem is, and see if she can recommend anything. Last time she asked me if I wanted to change. I was so angry with her BPD pseudo-diagnostic that I said NO, I don't want to change. Now however, after thinking about all this, and after one more incident with the BOL, I think: yes, I do want to change. It has nothing to do with BPD though, doc. Can you help me with my actual problem?
I'm seeing her tomorrow afternoon... crossing my finger that it'll go well.
- sid
poster:sid
thread:61
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20020516/msgs/68.html