Posted by Dinah on July 25, 2003, at 8:03:39
In reply to Re: Therapist Vacations » Dinah, posted by fallsfall on July 25, 2003, at 2:06:46
Now mind you, I have terrible problems calling him on vacation. Bad problems calling him while he's at work out of town. Problems calling him after hours or on the weekend. But no problems calling him any other time.
I don't think he thinks badly of me for it. He used to actively encourage me to call him when I felt bad rather than to let it build up until it was a real problem. He seems to subscribe to the DBT idea (although he's never heard of DBT) that it's better to encourage unstable types like me to call *before* there's an emergency. And "call me if you need to." had become part of our standard closing of the session. If he doesn't happen to say it, I assume it's because there's a reason he doesn't want to be called.
The net result of his encouragement to call him if I need to, and end of session reminders to call him if I need to is fewer calls to him. Somehow if I know I *can*, I don't *need to* as much. And there is less acting out. The same goes about vacation. If he tells me I can call, I get less anxious and don't need to call as much (coupled with my extreme reluctance to bother him on family time).
While every bit of what I just said is true, it's still a problem and if I had a therapist I already saw in his absence I would be reluctant to give that up. He's really not good over the phone. (REALLY!!!) And there's the reluctance to bother him.
But your new therapist may feel as strongly as mine does about transference contamination and may really really not want you to call anyone else. I guess it's best to talk the whole thing out with him. I'm leaning to talking about asking for a backup again, next time I'm up for tense feelings anyway.
poster:Dinah
thread:244934
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030711/msgs/245113.html