Posted by kara lynne on September 10, 2003, at 14:05:36
Yesterday I went to therapy and left feeling worse about myself. He kept saying my 'resistance' was up, and that we would get nowhere if I didn't trust him. Specifically when the subject of sex came up. I was feeling deeply depressed and told him I woke up wanting to die--I think there were other things that could have been addressed even though the subject of sex came up (talking about thwarted physical energy, why I'm feeling so sick, etc.etc.). I told him his style felt interrogative to me and it wasn't helping me to talk more. He said what are you here for, you've got to trust me to do the work, yadda yadda.
Well I left and realized what the problem is. I need to feel cared for by him. I've only known him a short while and I can't just launch into intimate details with him without that. I feel like a therapist should be bringing me out more, rather than making me feel more twisted up. Not that it's completely up to the therapist, but that there is a supportive chemistry between us.
I guess this is a kind of therapy that focuses more on 'the work' than the relationship, and maybe I just can't do it. I just realized yesterday how important it is for me to feel appreciated and cared for to feel safe enough to talk.
Is that so bad? Thanks for listening.
poster:kara lynne
thread:258785
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030905/msgs/258785.html