Posted by dragonfly25 on December 29, 2003, at 12:45:32
In reply to Re: Help- how can i tell if i have GAD?? » dragonfly25, posted by Poet on December 29, 2003, at 11:33:26
thanks poet,
here is a little about me in case you have any more input, i am so stressed, i don't want to have an anxiety disorder- i didn't know what anxiety was until recently...
i have suffered from severe bouts of depression for years. i was sent away which exaserbated it b/c it was an awful experience. after graduating high school i didn't have my head on right. i was exposed to other screwed up kids so my direction in life was warped and i didn't have any focus. i was lost and i just sort of screwed around for a few years. i took some college classes but not too serious on my part. eventually i some how knocked some sense into my self and saw a future ahead of me...i didn't want to be a nobody anymore. i new i had a brain but i wasn't using it. so i applied to college and got in to the one i wanted. i was insecure about being out of school for a few years and that i was a litlle older than other 1st year students. in 1st year i was picked on by a prof terribly- i couldn't think straight and the stress was causing me to blank out, she humiliated me in front of the class several times (it was a small class) - i finally went ot speak to her and she actually felt awful about it. but it stuck with me. i sit in class now worrying about the possibility of being called on or having to do something in front of class. i failed all but 1 class in 1st year b/c i started having anxiety at exam time and i would blank right out. i have a better handle on things now and i am doing much better, but when i am at school i am a stress case. i guess it is a feeling of my intellect being questioned in front of younger people (realisticly only i would know the age difference tho) i also have developed an incredible fear of public speaking. but i am fine in other group settings. i think some of it has to do with meds effecting my thinking and making me more stressed that i am not saying things right. that is why i want to go off my drugs- i'm too scared to tho. i have become very critical of myself, like what i say to peoplpe etc. this is new- my sister told me recently that she thinks my drugs have done something because in the last year or 2 i have changed alot (worrying and stuff) i think it is deeper than meds tho.
wow, that was long! sorry about that, but if you have any suggestions or advice id appreciate it.
dragonfly
poster:dragonfly25
thread:294108
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031221/msgs/294315.html