Posted by Skittles on August 31, 2004, at 1:01:12
I started therapy in April for a very specific issue - life as the custodian of another person's child and dealing with family that did not approve. The child has moved back with her parents, so other than a few after effects, I am about finished with my T and the idea terrifies me b/c I know I have MANY, MANY other life issues I need to talk about.
Here's the problem. My main problems are with my mother and she happens to also be a T in the city where I live - in a different suite, but in the same building as my T. My mom is just starting her own practice and while I have no worries that my T would tell her or anyone else anything specific I might say, I am worried that it might affect whether or not she would make referrals to Mom. And also that she might mention to others that referring to Mom wouldn't be a good idea. I have more frustration with Mom than I can even begin to explain, but I don't want to ruin her business before it ever starts.
Now, I need to vent my present "Mom Problem." When I was a teenager (before Mom completed her education), my mother sent me to several T's b/c I was "angry" and she figured it was because my Dad's a jerk. Each time, after a few visits, the T would talk to her and explain that while my Dad had a temper issue, I knew how to deal with him. My real problems were with her b/c I never knew from day to day whether she'd be running hot or cold. And each time, she get angry, rip me away from the T and send me to another. We went through 3 or 4 that way. Now, it's a decade later and I have NEVER, EVER discussed (with her)any issue I have concerning her. Well, there have been some problems lately and I decided it had been a long time and she was now a therapist herself, so maybe things would be different. NOT SO!!! I worked so hard to put things in terms of how I was feeling and not what she was doing - just like she would tell her patients to do. And she got very upset - but at first I thought things were going to be okay. Then at the end of the conversation, she blurts out - "Last time your Dad and I went to counseling, the T said he was a Narcissist. You might want to tell your T about it so she can help you because it's genetic." So see, it isn't her problem because I'm a narcissist!!! Of course, I don't know that I am, but now, in addition to being uber frustrated with my mom, I'm freaked that I could have a personality disorder.
So, how much do I tell my T - and believe me, what I told here is only the cherry on top!
poster:Skittles
thread:384476
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040828/msgs/384476.html