Posted by Daisym on February 4, 2005, at 12:44:56
In reply to Truculent, posted by Dinah on February 4, 2005, at 12:01:41
Dinah,
Who went to therapy today? Sounds like an important discussion that perhaps you weren't ready to take in. I think he was trying to get you to see that your assumptions about how people react to you are a little bit like fortune telling -- (someone used this with me yesterday and I think it fits here) -- you base it on something concrete, like past experience, but you have no way of knowing if you can generalize your experience in this way. Like your son's school. It might be possible that avoidance will be misread as not caring, instead of him appreciating where you are coming from. I think sometimes we do "favors" for people that they don't need nor appreciate.
As far as your therapist getting mad, sounds more like frustration. I think he wishes you could appreciate yourself. When I think back over sessions that feel unsatisfying, often I find that I've walled off the area we are trying to talk about. So his words bounce off, they don't resonate. I'm not actively defensive, just in my head about it, and sure I'm right. And I miss the warm and fuzzy support sometimes.
I'm glad you wrote it all out. Maybe rereading it will help before next week.
As far as truculent -- I think it goes with the need to be obstinate that seems built in with teens. I'm curious why you posted it with your session description?
poster:Daisym
thread:453102
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050129/msgs/453158.html