Posted by daisym on August 4, 2005, at 23:26:06
In reply to Two responses, for whatever they're worth... » pinkeye, posted by Racer on August 4, 2005, at 20:32:45
***I try to explain my emotions. I try to justify them. If I can't explain WHY I feel a certain way, I don't feel as though I'm allowed or entitled to feel it. I "shouldn't" feel it. Does taht make sense?
Then again, I come by it honestly. In my childhood, I was often asked to "explain" my feelings that way. If I couldn't explain, for example, how or why I was hurt by something someone else had done, then I wasn't really hurt -- I was just being "bad" somehow. Selfish, usually&*******
yes! Yes! YES!
EXACTLY.
But how do you "unlearn" this...I need to understand "why" -- I can't just accept that because I feel some way it is OK. I am full of shoulds and shouldn'ts.We had similar experiences as kids with emotions...my mom use to tell me, "don't whine about the problem, tell me what you want me to do about it." So not only was I not allowed to whine, I was supposed to know why AND find the solution.
poster:daisym
thread:537599
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050801/msgs/537689.html