Posted by frida on May 15, 2006, at 22:29:31
In reply to Saw my T, no help there today. **trigger**, posted by madeline on May 15, 2006, at 20:10:06
Hi..
I am so sorry your T wasn't there for you in the way you needed him to be...when you go to T needing something so badly-- feeling like the little girl we were...
and they react that way..it is truly painful. Maybe you can reach out to him?I am glad you went out to get hay for your piggies..
I have guinea pigs too, I was abused by my father, struggling, and my guinea pigs help me hang on and find a reason to keep on living
Sending you support,take gentle care of you..
fridaI don't know WHAT was wrong with him, but he really seemed to be almost angry at what I was saying.
>
> I was crying and blubbering the whole time and maybe he was upset by that.
>
> In fact, one time I had to tell him not to yell he got so worked up.
>
> My dad used to do that, get all worked up when I made the slightest little mistake.
>
> I would be mad at my T too, but I just don't have it in me. I'm to tired to do anything but just let his anger just wash over me. I think he will resolve it himself and everything will be fine on Wednesday.
>
> Life is really funny. Today when I got home from therapy I was making a list of the pros and cons of suicide. I could only think of one reason to do it, freedom from pain. I had a whole list of reasons not to. Most of them pet related, then realized my guinea pigs were out of hay and had to go to the pet store. I doubt if anyone in the store realized that just 15 minutes ago I was rationally trying to figure out whether or not to end my own life.
>
> I'm glad I decided to live another day that's always the right answer.
> Surely to god I will feel better tomorrow.
poster:frida
thread:644196
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060505/msgs/644535.html