Posted by Dinah on December 20, 2006, at 13:47:37
In reply to 2 Therapists At Same Time, posted by happykat on December 19, 2006, at 23:32:58
I don't think I'd keep a secret like that from my therapist. It wouldn't seem right in the relationship we have.
I've had several short term adjunct therapists during the time I've seen him, with his encouragement.
And over the years, I'd kind of bugged him about having two therapists, or at least a backup therapist I'm comfortable with. Because he does go on long business trips sometimes, and I don't think that's really fair to me.
But when he moved to another city, then left the country for effectively six weeks, I told him that was it. I was going to find a therapist for while he was gone, and not necessarily get rid of said therapist when he returned to the city three hours away, even if we also tried to work something out between us. He very reluctantly agreed.
In the end, by the time he came back, we used the fact that this therapist was a sex therapist as well as a regular therapist to justify the fact that I had two therapists at once. But in reality it was more than adjunct therapy.
It frankly was a problem. They were two different people with two different views of what it meant to be healthy, and how I best ought to go about achieving it. She was telling me things in direct contradiction to the things he told me, and while my first loyalty always lay with him, it was confusing to me, and it caused me to doubt myself, doubt my therapy, and get very angry with both of them at one point or another.
I quit seeing her when I discovered that my therapist planned to move back, and I think that was for the best.
In my experience, it just didn't work. It might be different if the two therapists had similar styles and viewpoints, and if they worked together to present a less chaotic whole.
That being said, I still wish I had a backup therapist that I felt comfortable with. My therapist still goes out of town as often as he can. And he admits to always being on the lookout for a real job. Sigh.
Is there any particular reason you're wanting to do this at this point?
poster:Dinah
thread:715149
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061210/msgs/715232.html