Posted by JayMac on September 12, 2008, at 18:27:53
In reply to Want to ask T to accompany me to Mom's grave, posted by stellabystarlight on September 12, 2008, at 17:43:50
> I need your advice.
>
> I have severe fear of visiting my Mother at her grave. I haven't been able to bring myself to go. Although loving at times, my relationship with her was mostly painful due to abandonment.
>
> I'm afraid the massive pain I'll feel at her grave will cripple me, but I want to see her so badly. I miss her.
>
> It would be so nice if I could take her a beautiful bouquet of flowers, her favorite foods, and play her favorite music while I just spend some time with her. I know this would make her very happy. I have forgiven her and I love my Mom, but I'm so afraid.
>
> I think that I could go if my therapist went with me, and of course I would pay him for his time.
> I know I should talk to him, but do you think this is an unreasonable request to a therapist? I would appreciate your thoughts on this. Thanks.
>
>Stella Star,
I think it's GREAT that you want to visit your mom's grave! That's wonderful! Bringing her flowers and playing music for her: that's very touching =)Whether or not you T goes with you? I don't know. But I do know that there are things you two could do together to *prepare* you for whatever you may feel while visiting her grave, for example guided imagery. Maybe you could schedule a session within hours of visiting her gave.
Speak with your T. I'm sure he will be able to come up with some way to help alleviate some of the pain associated with the visit. It may take days, weeks, or months to work up the courage to visit her, but I'm sure your T would love to help you!
How you previously spoken about visiting your mom's grave with your T?
Hugs to you!
Take Care,
Jay
poster:JayMac
thread:851692
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/851698.html