Posted by Nadezda on October 1, 2008, at 18:45:08
In reply to My apologies to all, posted by Dinah on October 1, 2008, at 11:28:52
I'm sure this is something urgent and very real to you, Dinah-- but try to remember: it's only that you feel incompetent at life, not that you are-- you are so very thoughtful, full of wisdom and deep understanding. I know that's different from feeling it yourself--or appreciating how much it means to other people.
I guess this is what they mean in DBT when they say that a feeling isn't a fact; that it can often be mistaken, or disproportionate to the events-- and that it needs to be seen as that-- a feeling and not a fact about the world. (Sometimes, of course, it is a fact.) I wish there were some way for us to interrupt this cascade of thoughts and fears and self-accusations.
But I also know what it's like to be caught in their shadow. It's important to remember the resources against these feelings--whether it's meditation, or a hot shower, or giving yourself permission to take a break-- but if you try not to let them overwhelm you, you may at least lessen the storm. You are, after all, much more than the feelings of this moment.
Or maybe if you can find the trigger-- the letdown from the threat of the hurricane, something in your family, or perhaps the combination of physical discomfort and exhaustion--you'll find some relief there..
Whatever it takes, you've certainly been thoughtful and kind far beyond what's expected to me, and I know to many of us here.
Nadezda
poster:Nadezda
thread:855074
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/855142.html