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Re: I'm back in the black hole » backseatdriver

Posted by TherapyGirl on April 2, 2009, at 18:50:31

In reply to Re: I'm back in the black hole, posted by backseatdriver on April 2, 2009, at 15:16:33

Nail on the head, BSD. Thank you for expressing it so well.

I keep waiting for the tools, and instead she seems reluctant to even talk about her retirement. I told her in November that we needed to talk about this EVERY week because it would take me all of the time we had left together to try to deal with this. She said it would be her responsibility to make sure we dealt with that. She's brought it up exactly twice since then. I've brought it up a few more times. But mostly we don't deal with it.

Even tonight, when she asked me to tell her what I was feeling and why I was unable to tell her (we actually argued about whether she really wanted to know). I told her, "There are not enough drugs in the world and no words I can think of to make this okay, so it seems pointless. And you are part of the problem. And I feel like if I say the wrong thing, you're going to throw my a** into the hospital." Instead of dealing with the one issue that she might could help control she said, "I'm sorry this is so hard for you," and we spent the rest of the session in silence. It's just completely inadequate.

 

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poster:TherapyGirl thread:888095
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090328/msgs/888292.html