Posted by obsidian on September 25, 2010, at 14:02:52
In reply to borderline personality disorder, posted by Annabelle Smith on September 24, 2010, at 21:40:49
sure, I understand a lot of that.
I'd be careful about labeling yourself. It might end up making you feel worse.
Being attached to someone, especially someone you want in your life can be frightening....this can be quite intense particularly if you have had less than ideal attachment experiences in your life.
It's a horrible place to be stuck really, needing very much to relate and connect and being unable to tolerate the experience of it because of the fear, maybe of rejection, abandonment.
I'm not really sure that there are a lot of people out there who really don't want to have relationships with people, and wanting to depend on people to a certain extent is absolutely normal.
I kind of think about kids....when they know their parent isn't going anywhere, when they don't question whether they are loved, then they can experience the world in a similar way. When they can know that this is consistent, they don't have to be preoccupied with it, and they spend their energy in other ways.
In my case, my feelings became easier to manage over time, it got a lot better, but it was pretty awful in the beginning of therapy.
I hope you have a therapist you can talk to about this...maybe write it down and take it with you.
The feelings aren't wrong, it's the managing them part that is a real challenge.
take care,
sid
poster:obsidian
thread:963658
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100831/msgs/963718.html