Posted by AdaGrace on December 22, 2004, at 15:28:44
In reply to Re: I just want to feel good again, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 19:56:55
I seemed to have taken a downward spiral turn into never never land and I keep hitting my head on the staircase. I can't seem to climb back up and the stairs slope towards hell so steeply now. I keep messing up. I keep really messing up. I think I am forgetting my medicine on purpose. I keep dreaming and dreaming, searching and searching for love and not finding it. I am torturing and tormenting myself and I can't stop. I know I need help. I just can't seem to find the time. I'm about to lose my job or at least the insurance part of it, and the job is soon to be gone as well. I'm scared. I'm lost. And now the only therapy has been taken away from me (babble) and I have noone to turn to really. Today is the first day I have had any real time to respond on here in two weeks. I'm actually sober enough to type and that's a first. I miss this place like air. I miss my old dumb fat self. The one that didn't know and didn't feel. Now I feel too much. I'm scared, really scared.
Ada
poster:AdaGrace
thread:431685
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041207/msgs/432942.html