Posted by spoc on May 7, 2004, at 10:51:01
In reply to day II sorry so short... » spoc, posted by karen_kay on May 6, 2004, at 13:19:43
....Hmmm? No, sorry, no clarification will be forthcoming. Either you get it or you don't.
Which does beg the question, however: If you were a character on Seinfeld, which one would you be? In your answer, you may allude to aggregates of characters; as well as use any "cameo" or non-regular characters. Please use a number 2 pencil and press firmly, but check your quarters at the door.
Well Karen, I fear I may have used today's purportedly fresh coherence on the med board already, and there is less than usual left for you. (Do not bother scrambling over there to hang on my every available word -- it was not very interesting *nor* informative, but in my chronic obsessive compulsive state I wore myself out as usual just by memorizing all the drug names, dosages and caveats of things I have NO intention of ever trying.
Do you ever do that kind of thing? I'll be reading a Useful book, wherein the main objective is simply to get through it and glean whatever information I may be so lucky to without spacing out as I read. But when I realize I've been spacing out, I make myself go way back and start over, even to relatively unimportant parts or footnotes, as though the objective is true memorization of every word. So regarding many types of self-help books, instead of netting 80% of the information and being thankful for that, I net 100% of what's in the first 15 pages, then put it down forever.
Anyway Karen, it's kinda stormy out which I am liking; but there is some kind of spark, some electricity in the air; and I believe I would enjoy using my remaining time here to complain and be difficult for a change. Will you join me?
First, I would like some historical perspective on your implication that when we visit your family on the farm, I will be wearing a skirt. For one thing, I am not about to push the envelope the way Sarah did and be overdressed when I arrive. So if instead you refer to the salt-of-the-earth, practical, plaid frocks or housecoats sported by many farm women of oldde, just what is it I have gotten myself into here? What exactly ARE the womenfolk in your family like? Will we be wearing pinafores and buns too?
And just what is it that you think I'll be doing that will facilitate your family members being able to see up my dress? Do you think I'm about to help with chores? Possibly even climbing up a tall ladder in the barn to that second level wherein the slasher or mutating creature can always be found in horror movies? NO THANK YOU, and I don't find it encouraging that you would let me risk my life that way; nor the lives of your own supposedly treasured family, when I also mutate into a zombie and come back to eat them later. Learn to think ahead and display better reasoning skills, would you?
Your story about having the police called on you at Target has also stirred up something painful for me, thank you very much. Many years ago I drove over the border into Canada with some friends to go X-mas shopping. In our naivete, we believed that hitting the first mall we came across would put us on the trail of exotic quality items, just as though we had made it all the way to Montreal or Toronto. Clues as to the error of our ways -- such as itchy plastic threads sticking out of most garments, and sleeves of differing lengths on the same article -- were somehow escaping us. We posed for a keepsake picture together in full-length fur coats, then hung them back up to break for lunch, trailing patches of animal hair behind us as we went.
We decided to enjoy our midday meal in the restaurant of a department store. We were admittedly giggling just a bit over something or other, at a decibel probably similar to that heard from people requesting directions from gas station attendants. There were no drugs or alcohol involved. Well, the next thing we knew, our plates had been removed; we were in the office of the store manager pleading for our very lives; and then were being swiftly escorted from the premises by security.
Later, upon entering civilation again, we were informed that this store is the Canadian cousin of Sears. And we all breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that our very status as classy broads was not in fact at issue. Subsequently, we also heard that the reason there are no Kentucky Fried Chicken outlets in Canada is that they can't get the seven secret herbs and spices through customs. And it was then we realized that by this definition, our senses of humor were probably indeed rather spicy -- yet clearly delicious. But it took me years to really believe that and come to terms with it. So thanks Karen, that was yet another step on the ladder of my slow descent into mental illness, and you had to go and remind me.
As a matter of fact, you are all pretty inconsiderate of my issues. Why, just yesterday I was smiling through the pain and looking at the bright side as I posted to noa that I had enjoyed her description of magical little sand crabs that scurry here and there. When in fact this memory also hurt me deeply. When I was an adolescent, I got it in my head against the wishes of my mother that the perfect birthday gift to present to a friend at her party would be a live fiddler crab in bowl (wrapped at the last minute of course, with holes punched to facilitate oxygen distribution). I thought this creative idea would make me the favorite gift-giver and bring admiration upon me from the party goers in general.
Well. Imagine my horror when the bowl was unwrapped and there languished the live crab, somehow sans most of its legs, which were floating about in the water around it. Although I have no clue as to what caused that to happen -- I had handled everything as gingerly as possible and had stood ready to ward off any attempted shaking of the package -- needless to say this gift choice did not, in fact, make me the belle of the ball. Noa, would it *REALLY* be too much to ask that you anticipate such a thing before you post? Please confine all future posting to Barney jokes and tales of kind-hearted forest creatures (all of whom are in possession of all their limbs).
Actually Karen, I think I may be coming down with something today. It is at such times that I am best able to help others dispense with any positive illusions they may be hurting themselves with. So here's another one, germane to our common experiences in being at this board. Perhaps you have at times seen this admonition:
"You seem to have closed the posting window without submitting a post. In case you did that by mistake, here's what was in your message box:
[Insert given universal truth]
"If you just decided not to submit anything, that's fine, of course, and you can just ignore this."
WELL!! I am here to tell YOU that often you CANNOT "just ignore this!!" That is NOT in fact always the case! Often this message will NOT go away, even when I completely close out the board and come back in! There are NO options to "Click Here to Get on with Your Life" provided in the message, and going Back from the browser arrow doesn't work either at these times. "..That's FINE of course...You can just ignore this..." YEAH RIGHT. YOU MAY IN FACT BE PENALIZED FOR QUITE SOME TIME. JUST ANOTHER LIE, ANOTHER INSTANCE OF US BEING LEAD ASTRAY IN AN ALREADY CRUEL WORLD! I am close to breaking the story that in reality, Dr. Bob inflicts this bug -- together with unworkably short title lines -- on every 73rd poster registering; and then tracks their descent into madness as it manifests in their posts.
Karen, I am going to go toil for my keep now, and this has only constituted a quickie for me (again, get your mind out of the gutter. And surely that's not how you want it to be the first time anyway). Rest assured that I am, in my compulsive way, keeping track of ALL unfinished subjects we have touched on since the beginning; and you have raised several additional issues over which you can eagerly anticipate me getting back to you eventually. The agony and the ecstasy does not stop here, despite the fading interest demonstrated by your gratuitous and hurried response yesterday. ;- )
poster:spoc
thread:340747
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040507/msgs/344364.html