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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by helenag on January 20, 2004, at 17:00:24
Well, well, I saw my pdoc for the first time since being discharged last month from the hospital. It was my fifth hospitalization since April and needless to say, he seem(ed)(s) quite frustrated with me. I am saying all this with tongue in cheek because I am angry right now, so here goes. His "pronouncement" to me before discharge was that I was making myself sick. I wish I had had the guts to yell back at him that no one in their right mind goes to a psych ward to while away the time... like I was doing this on purpose. I was "made" to feel like a real wacked out woman. Further, it doesn't help to be an alcoholic, either. He uses that a lot to bear down on me on how it worsens anxiety, etc. etc. even though I may not have even been drinking before cycling into depression or anxiety, or if drinking, very little and very seldom. This time, he added borderline traits to the list, which is true enough. But the way he did it makes me feel so bad about myself.
I've been sober for a few weeks now and told him, and he says "I'm proud of you." Big deal. Like I need his pat on my back. No word about how that is good for me. Then, he says to me, don't take this the wrong way, but, you are so calm today, are you putting this on for me?
Ha!!I told him I was anxious over the weekend about seeing him. It's like seeing the dentist and the gynecologist in one. I then told him I was upset over what he said in the hospital. He said he meant I made choices contrary to health, etc, etc.
I wonder if he is upset because my husband wanted a second opinion while I was in the hospital. We didn't have it done, though. But boy, my pdoc wanted me to be sure to tell the doctor we chose for the second opinion that I wasn't always "compliant." Meaning I didn't always full doses of meds when the side effects were too strong.
What is bothering the most???Anyone who has had as much trouble as me this year feels bad enough putting their family through all the hospital stuff and the worrying...I spend way too much time getting down on myself for mood swings and for having emotional problems. Seeing this doctor yesterday brought all of this up again and now I am looking into that mirror again and seeing a sick wacked out middle aged woman who is all at fault for all of this. And that's just not true.
I get so angry for feeling this way because I know it is unjust to myself, yet there it is.
Thanks for letting me vent. I looked forward to being able to get on the board all day while at work.
Peace, Helen.
Posted by Penny on January 21, 2004, at 9:48:51
In reply to Re: Need to vent about pdoc, posted by helenag on January 20, 2004, at 17:00:24
Can you find a new pdoc? Because, really, I think you should be with someone supportive of you! Any possibilities?
And any doc worth their salt wouldn't be threatened at all by a second opinion.
I hope things get better for you.
P
Posted by helenag on January 21, 2004, at 11:38:16
In reply to Re: Need to vent about pdoc » helenag, posted by Penny on January 21, 2004, at 9:48:51
> Can you find a new pdoc? Because, really, I think you should be with someone supportive of you! Any possibilities?
>
> And any doc worth their salt wouldn't be threatened at all by a second opinion.
>
> I hope things get better for you.
>
> PPenny, thank you for responding. It helps to know at least one person read my note! I have at times thought of switching docs and decided not to because of the hassle of changing. My therapist works in the office, too. And I like my therapist and feels he is very supportive of me.
I've had this pdoc for over three years; he has all my records, all my history, etc. From being in the hospital so much, I am well acquainted with the other docs on staff, and there's only one other doc that I would consider (the one I was going to get the second opinion from). In the end, I decided it is six of one and half dozen of the other.
Thanks again for listening. Helen.
Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2004, at 13:01:07
In reply to Re: Need to vent about pdoc » Penny, posted by helenag on January 21, 2004, at 11:38:16
Don't let the hassle concern you as much as your wellbeing. I stuck with the most awful pdoc for way too long, because he was affiliated with the clinic my therapist was working with, and because it seemed easier than starting over. The second pdoc I foolishly had my records forwarded to, more of the same. The third pdoc didn't request my records and I didn't volunteer them. He lowered the AD doses and put me on a mood stabilizer and I was sooooo much better off.
The really bad one was also very demeaning in his attitude towards me. I think he got mad because I didn't get better - what a huge surprise when he had missed that I need a mood stabilizer with AD's.
There *are* decent pdocs out there who will treat you with respect. You deserve one of them for yourself.
This is the end of the thread.
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