Posted by stebby on August 22, 2003, at 20:06:31
In reply to Re: Why bother with therapy? » stebby, posted by allisonf on August 22, 2003, at 9:15:19
It sure sounds like we have a lot in common. What did your husband say when you said you had sexual feelings for her? I finally discussed some of this with my husband over the last few days. He was seeing our marriage going down the tubes, and it was completely freaking him out that I was talking to people on line. So, I told him just what we are talking about which seemed to make things better. I disclosed that I am having the same obsession I went through with the last therapist. He is doing his best to understand, but he is definitely struggling with the fact that he thought he married a really "together" person, and he keeps finding ut all this new stuff about me.
The pefume incident you discussed would have done the same to me. I would have wondered if she was she putting it on for me as well. I have to say that I find that a bit strange. Maybe she enjoys feeling wanted by you. Have you read "In Session." I am reading it right now after hearing about it from Dinah. Its very helpful.
I regards to your question about why I want to get out of therapy, it was not just one particular incident..well maybe...I don't know. You see, when I went to my next session following the one when i disclosed that I am "in love" again, I sensed a real distancing from my therapist. I am so afraid of this info freaking her out like it did my last therapist. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. Sometimes I just can't help feel that the situation continues to put you in a state of longing that can never be reciprocated. Is this somehow healthy? Unfortuabltely, I am so attached it would be devastating to leave. What a quandry! I imagine you must feel the same way. Is this really going to help me? It also makes me want my husband less...not good either. Maybe, I just can't do therapy! I'm on a major break from therpay here (three weeks). Part of me does not want to return because it will jsut re-intensify the longingsd again. Am I really going to "learn" something about myself from this? Are you learning about yourself from this experience? Maybe, I am learning that I have unmet needs and they aren't going to be met by her. Just great! Okay, I'm rambling again.
Are you feeling any better after your pills and alcohol incident? Is your therapist back from vacatron?
poster:stebby
thread:251041
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030814/msgs/253264.html