Posted by Dinah on August 23, 2003, at 22:48:47
In reply to Re: Why bother with therapy? » fallsfall, posted by stebby on August 23, 2003, at 19:33:45
I think I've worked through it to some extent. Working on anger was a big issue. I'm beginning to believe that it is not the end of a relationship if people are angry with each other.
Abandonment we're still working on. But I have quit feeling terrified that he'll terminate me at any moment. I have quit having dreams where he terminates me. That's no longer my first question of the session. :)
I've learned to approach issues directly as they crop up in the relationship. And I'm getting much better about asking for what I need.
I don't know if those are transference issues exactly. But they are problems that crop up in all my relationships. And I'm getting better with them. We use our relationship to work on them since it's there. :) But we also use my relationship with my husband, and friends, and this board.
But the main thrust of our therapy isn't relationship issues or the transference. It's more shoring up my fragile coping mechanisms to last another week in teh real world. It's to keep me up and functioning. So there can be very real reasons to bother with therapy. :)
But it doesn't hurt to assess the benefits vs. costs from time to time. Unless of course the assessment is suggested by your therapist as mine did last week. Fortunately I had just spent some time thinking about the issues and so was able to come up with a cogent and compelling argument for why therapy did me more good than harm. I had just read the book:
"When to Say Goodbye to Your Therapist"
by Catherine JohnsonI really recommend it for helping you sort out your thoughts on this issue. And it has a decent discussion on transference as well. Not as good as "In Session" but pretty good.
poster:Dinah
thread:251041
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030814/msgs/253503.html