Posted by raisinb on February 24, 2009, at 7:59:21
In reply to I am hopeless, helpless, and want to die., posted by Looney Tunes on February 23, 2009, at 15:31:02
Looney Tunes,
It sounds like you did exactly the right thing in leaving this therapist. In doing so, you stood up for yourself and your own emotional health. You were there for you, when even your therapist wasn't. That means you're much, much stronger than you think. Try to hang on to this and trust that with that kind of inner strength, this terrible time will pass.
As others have said, there are so many wonderful therapists out there. I think it's interesting that you identified a pattern in your relationships with your therapists. This isn't your fault at all--it's the therapists' responsibility to stop these types of patterns. So I think you should explain in detail to your next therapist what led to the ending of this relationship. That way, s/he will be able to help prevent that dynamic from repeating itself.
Your helplessness, wanting to die feelings--it sounds to me that even though your therapist is the one who screwed up, you blame yourself on some level. This is common for people with a history of abuse, neglect, or any other trauma. But it isn't true. Once you truly understand that it isn't your fault, you will be able to move on from this destructive relationship.
But it may take time to be able to do that, it it will probably take help. In the meantime, you have experienced a loss, and you need to be patient with yourself. Take care of yourself--rent movies, eat ice cream--whatever.
(((LT)))
poster:raisinb
thread:881951
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/882133.html