Posted by Dinah on July 12, 2013, at 15:07:27
In reply to Therapist closing his pratice, posted by winsome on July 12, 2013, at 9:13:58
My therapist has told me that even if he retires, he would continue to see me until he's too feeble to be of any use. We'd work out something. His reason was the same as your therapist's. That I was attached, and had abandonment issues. He even added that he doubted I would attach easily to another therapist. He did, I must admit, have reasons for that conclusion.
I took it as caring. Because really he has no obligation to continue to see you. He could just hand you off to another therapist. He cares that it would hurt you if he did that.
I'm not sure what "liking" would mean, in comparison to caring. I'm not even certain my therapist likes me. He wouldn't want to hang out with me in his real life. In fact he kind of hurt my feelings today. He mentioned today that there were clients he might like to have as friends, but that he never could because he was their therapist. He wasn't talking about me, I can assure you. I thought my transference was at a point where that wouldn't bother me, but I was apparently wrong.
But he does care about me, and he wants what's best for me.
I'm sure there are diagnostic considerations in there. A therapist who cares for their client will want to do what's best for them. They wouldn't encourage a dependency that was unhealthy. If he thought that seeing him sometimes in person and sometimes on Skype, in what is undoubtedly a less than ideal situation, was not in your best interests, a caring therapist would do what he could to see you settled with another therapist.
So, from that point of view, had he pushed you towards another nest, it may have been a sign of caring. But I think continuing to see you in the circumstances is definitely a sign of caring.
If for any reason it doesn't work out, please don't see that as a *lack* of caring.
I think he's trying to do his best for you. His best professionally, certainly. But his best as a professional who does care what happens to you.
poster:Dinah
thread:1047059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20130309/msgs/1047074.html