![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:53:57
Alright, so I've had this belief since I was about eighteen or so, that I smell, and that I make everyone around me uncomfortable. I'm sure you all are familiar with the signs. Sniffing, coughing, sighing, people complaining of headaches and not being able to concentrate, and various cues of respiratory distress. I understand that sometimes, these signs have nothing to do with me. But when I hear them from just about every person I meet, I have to wonder if I'm the source of at least some of it.
I've asked everyone who should be telling me the truth. None of them will tell me that I smell. My family, my psychiatrist, my team of caretakers, my primary care physician, dentist, everyone. My psychiatrist says that I have a fixed belief. Not necessarily a false belief or delusion, but a fixed belief. I have a feeling that he's only waiting for me to prove that I smell logically, rather than intuitively. He says that the signs that I tell him about are all purely circumstantial. I've only had people come out and say that I smell a few times, and these times I actually did detect my own odor, so those don't really count in the belief that maybe I smell all the time, times after I've showered, am wearing clean clothes, have brushed my teeth, and so on.
It's hard when you've almost totally lost respect for yourself, and feel like everyone who should care is lying. What do you guys think? Might I be crazy?
Posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:59:22
In reply to Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:53:57
I'm sorry about one line that I posted in the initial thing. The thing where I assumed you all are familiar with the signs. This was copy pasted from a body odor support forum, so that's my excuse. Sorry!
Posted by Racer on December 13, 2007, at 0:28:44
In reply to Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:53:57
> I've only had people come out and say that I smell a few times, and these times I actually did detect my own odor, so those don't really count in the belief that maybe I smell all the time, times after I've showered, am wearing clean clothes, have brushed my teeth, and so on.
I think if you turned that around, you might be able to ask another question: If people have told you that you do smell, at times when you can smell yourself, perhaps that is a sign that if you can't smell yourself, no one else can, either?
What you're describing does sound like a fixed belief -- that is, a belief that perseveres in the face of evidence to the contrary. You've got some evidence that you can use to help break through that belief, but it would require you to wrap your head around a new perspective. (Sorry, I can't seem to communicate tonight. I hope you know what I'm trying to say, since I obviously can't manage to say it...)
>
> What do you guys think? Might I be crazy?Sure, you might be crazy. Then again, most of us might be crazy. The important thing is that your concern is real to you, and you're working on ways to resolve the problem.
Good luck. I hope that helps.
Posted by star008 on December 13, 2007, at 9:28:37
In reply to Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:53:57
tf,,
There is nothing I can tell you that you will beleive but how bout a professional opinion?? I a a registered respiratory therapist and I have never. ever run across people who have trouble breathing around other people because theysmell.The only time this happens is when someone wears too much perfume or cologne..That can plug up my nose and give me a headache pretty quickly..
If you just smelled really bad, people would not hang around long enough foryou to notice the symptoms u describe.. YOU know, if you were with someone who just reeked would you stay by them and talk to them even though it was making you sick??? there is no way..Someone would tell you the truth..Even family members won't lie if your breathe is funky or something..But if you won't beleive anyone than how can they ever convince you.
I don't have good answers for you to solve this issue but I can reaffirm for you that it is not logical and doesn't makes sense.. There are a whole lot of things that I do that are not logical and don't make sense so please don't feel like you are so different than everyone else..
Posted by TF on December 13, 2007, at 11:40:13
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of. » TF, posted by Racer on December 13, 2007, at 0:28:44
idk, maybe I'm not expressing myself well enough to get this across. Maybe I'm too stupid to prove something logically rather than intuitively. Maybe I shouldn't trust myself, or my every instinct, and should let other people do the thinking for me. Maybe they should cut out pieces of my brain for a study. I'm beginning to think that I've lost my mind. I'm still sure that the signs are there, as poorly as I described them, and that I must smell.
I brought my car to a radiator specialist today. He took a look at it outside. When I left it, the windows were up. He had to move it aside to make room for other things. When I got into the car, I found the windows rolled down. It was cold outside. Maybe someone can tell me, what am I supposed to believe this means? I don't smell anything amiss in my car. Maybe I'm just too used to it, or our own scent is weaker to our nose. I don't know. All I know is that these things happen all the time to me.
I feel silly posting these things up at a forum for psychology and then another forum for body odor, expecting anything that would be remotely unbiased. The people from the other forum tell me I'm not crazy, and that I really do stink. I realise that they really shouldn't be talking as they haven't even met me, and that their words are as biased as could come. These responses mean nothing. It confuses me, however, that this is the only place where I get an answer that seems unbiased, makes sense, and yet cannot be believed at the same time. Not to be insulting, but I guess we learn to talk in pretty little circles when we dabble in psychology.
I'm such an idiot that it's funny. I think I've been barking up the wrong tree. Instead of seeing some pdoc, I could've had my plumbing looked at, or something. Well that's another two years wasted.
Posted by Dory on December 14, 2007, at 8:31:09
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 13, 2007, at 11:40:13
Hi Tf.. fixed belief.. i like the term, and i think some of my own "baggage" could fall into that definition... even though T & pdoc like to use terms like schemas, fear of this or that (blah blah blah).
have you gone to a doctor that specializes in these things? i recall you asking others like pdoc and dentist.. i mean, there must be some sort of doc who is more specialized. From what you say i think you'd have trouble if he/she said you did not have an odor problem. It doesn't sound like you'd believe them maybe? But maybe it would give you some evidence one way or the other.
i just posted a question on another type of forum as well.. and it's the same in some ways. Do i trust the feeling i have trusted for so long, or trust what someone else is telling me is "reality?" It's a tough place to be in. i don't have an answer to that or i'd be the first to give it to you. My only suggestion is to talk/write it out.. explore the thought process and see what you find out. But.. and this is a big but.. it will only help you if you are open to the possibility that maybe it is a fixed belief and that maybe you are reading this into what you see.. just the possibility.
it doesn't mean you're crazy, but i wont tell you you're not. Like you said, how would i know from a couple of posts? (you don't sound crazy though)
personally.. i think people dislike something about me.. and i admire your courage in saying it.. i don't have that.. not that brave.
i'll give you a couple of things to think about...
when and how did this idea start?
what would it mean to you if someone said "yes you smell?"You said a few people had? was i reading wrong? What did it feel like when they confirmed your thought? Did it ease the fear? It sounds like it did not.. like the *fear* of getting that rejection rxn is more solid.. i mean, if it's true, then you wouldn't have to be afraid that you do, you'd know it. But you seem hooked on the doubt that makes you afraid.. waiver back and forth.
i am afraid like i said.. i have "evidence" it's not true, but i feel like i see "signs" around me that suggest it is true.. so which do i go with? It's like there couldn't be enough evidence in the world to answer it for me (just me). Even when i feel it is confirmed, i go back to worrying about the next scenario. See what i mean?
just thoughts.. take or toss.
Posted by TF on December 14, 2007, at 11:05:50
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of. » TF, posted by Dory on December 14, 2007, at 8:31:09
> Hi Tf.. fixed belief.. i like the term, and i think some of my own "baggage" could fall into that definition... even though T & pdoc like to use terms like schemas, fear of this or that (blah blah blah).
>I really have come to hate the term, myself. It's yet another way of giving me a mixed signal, and making me distrust everyone including myself. Fixed belief as opposed to false belief.
> have you gone to a doctor that specializes in these things? i recall you asking others like pdoc and dentist.. i mean, there must be some sort of doc who is more specialized. From what you say i think you'd have trouble if he/she said you did not have an odor problem. It doesn't sound like you'd believe them maybe? But maybe it would give you some evidence one way or the other.
>
Someone told me on another forum, a depression forum or something, that nobody would tell me that I smelled or had body odor. It's beginning to look that way, unless they're strangers who are deriving some sort of amusement from it. I think metabolic disorders might cause body odor or whatever. Maybe an endocrinologist. I might just go up to random people on the street and start asking them. I'll ask like everyone I know. I don't care if they laugh. If I do smell, they'd be laughing behind my back.> i just posted a question on another type of forum as well.. and it's the same in some ways. Do i trust the feeling i have trusted for so long, or trust what someone else is telling me is "reality?" It's a tough place to be in. i don't have an answer to that or i'd be the first to give it to you. My only suggestion is to talk/write it out.. explore the thought process and see what you find out. But.. and this is a big but.. it will only help you if you are open to the possibility that maybe it is a fixed belief and that maybe you are reading this into what you see.. just the possibility.
>I appreciate the comment, but I really am tired of getting mixed signals. I'm really at war with myself, part of me wanting to believe them and part of me wanting to believe myself. I really don't know what to think at this point. I can only react to things as they come.
> it doesn't mean you're crazy, but i wont tell you you're not. Like you said, how would i know from a couple of posts? (you don't sound crazy though)
>
> personally.. i think people dislike something about me.. and i admire your courage in saying it.. i don't have that.. not that brave.
>It gets easier once you get over the hump of telling it to someone, and more as you tell it to others. Anyway, I have nothing to lose by talking about it here, as I'm pretty much anonymous.
> i'll give you a couple of things to think about...
>
> when and how did this idea start?
>
Senior year of high school I started to notice people getting disgusted by me, groaning when I came into the room. If the class lasted a while, some kids would get up to the teacher to complain about not being able to concentrate. I think it'd be understood what they're talking about to themselves, if it wasn't to me. If the odor is that strong.> what would it mean to you if someone said "yes you smell?"You said a few people had? was i reading wrong? What did it feel like when they confirmed your thought? Did it ease the fear? It sounds like it did not.. like the *fear* of getting that rejection rxn is more solid.. i mean, if it's true, then you wouldn't have to be afraid that you do, you'd know it. But you seem hooked on the doubt that makes you afraid.. waiver back and forth.
>At this point, I really don't care if people tell me I smell. In fact, I'd welcome it. It'd give me something to show to my doctor that he might not consider 'circumstantial'. Especially if I'd showered well and used deodorant that day. Sometimes I feel like flipping him off and asking him if that sign is circumstantial.
> i am afraid like i said.. i have "evidence" it's not true, but i feel like i see "signs" around me that suggest it is true.. so which do i go with? It's like there couldn't be enough evidence in the world to answer it for me (just me). Even when i feel it is confirmed, i go back to worrying about the next scenario. See what i mean?
>
> just thoughts.. take or toss.One of these days I'm going to learn the rules of logic and pawn my doctor. Until then I guess I'll have to remain a fool in his office. Right now what I want to do is quit the whole process and go off my my med (Geodon). I can't really sleep without it, but my real doctor can give me some sleeping pills, I suppose.
Posted by Dory on December 14, 2007, at 12:34:36
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 14, 2007, at 11:05:50
i guess i was just wondering aloud what exactly you'd like to see happen.. ? i am thinking you are saying that you'd like someone to say "yes you smell" so that you can tell your pdoc he is wrong.. yes?
can i ask why you went to a pdoc?
i wish i knew what to say that would help. It's obvious you are really struggling with this and are very frustrated. i suppose it's kind of like a mild paranoia that could actually be true.
can i ask why it matters so much? i'm not an idiot, i mean, i can see why certain behaviours would sting.. but i know people who smell bad, or who have some other thing that makes them a target of stuff like that sometimes... i don't feel any different toward them, do your friends and family act differently towards you than you think they might otherwise? Strangers will always be a random mix of the nice and the not so nice. i've had people make rude comments to me.
i'm not saying it's not a big deal, it clearly is to you.. and if it's how you feel then it's a big deal. i'm just not sure exactly how that fits into your world..socially i mean, among your family and friends.
you said that our own odor doesn't smell so strong to us.. but do you smell *anything*? i know when i don't smell so great.
why do you think a doctor would not tell you if you actually had an odor problem? what would be their reasoning?
Posted by TF on December 14, 2007, at 13:39:58
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of. » TF, posted by Dory on December 14, 2007, at 12:34:36
> i guess i was just wondering aloud what exactly you'd like to see happen.. ? i am thinking you are saying that you'd like someone to say "yes you smell" so that you can tell your pdoc he is wrong.. yes?
>Yeah, that's right. I'm really just after some evidence. I don't know what would suffice for him, as reactions that I've gotten from people don't seem like enough. He just classifies them as circumstantial.
> can i ask why you went to a pdoc?
>
I had a breakdown a couple years ago because of all this. Ended up in the hospital, and they set me up in this center that tries to help people with mental disorders.I do have a mental disorder. I've become paranoid and anxious and depressed because of all of this. They tell me that the 'this' exists because I'm paranoid.
> i wish i knew what to say that would help. It's obvious you are really struggling with this and are very frustrated. i suppose it's kind of like a mild paranoia that could actually be true.
>
> can i ask why it matters so much? i'm not an idiot, i mean, i can see why certain behaviours would sting.. but i know people who smell bad, or who have some other thing that makes them a target of stuff like that sometimes... i don't feel any different toward them, do your friends and family act differently towards you than you think they might otherwise? Strangers will always be a random mix of the nice and the not so nice. i've had people make rude comments to me.
>It's just that my ego can't take being smelly. I don't want people to think that I'm not hygenic, or a slob, or an idiot, or unnattractive. And this whole thing, the signs people give me, such as the rolling down of the windows in my car, incessant sniffing whenever I'm present, or people complaining that they can't concentrate, or are nauseated. And that no one will confirm my belief when I talk to them about it. It all makes me kind of misanthropic. It just makes me hate people in general.
> i'm not saying it's not a big deal, it clearly is to you.. and if it's how you feel then it's a big deal. i'm just not sure exactly how that fits into your world..socially i mean, among your family and friends.
>
Well, I have no friends, outside of the interweb. And my family doesn't seem to mind. But I do. I just refuse to present myself this way.> you said that our own odor doesn't smell so strong to us.. but do you smell *anything*? i know when i don't smell so great.
>
Not really, when I've showered and stuff. And I can detect my odor after not having showered for a while. That's where I run into problems mentally I guess.
> why do you think a doctor would not tell you if you actually had an odor problem? what would be their reasoning?
>
In terms of the pdoc, there's really nothing he can do for me other than try and make me disbelieve it. The real doctor told me that I don't smell only after I said I have normal bathing habits. She didn't know what, other than poor hygeine, could cause a smell.Maybe I'll see a holistic healer or something. I have a feeling that all these 'legit' doctors have a conspiracy going.
My caretakers called me this week. I returned their calls, but if they try and get in touch with me again I think I'll just let it ring. With the exception of getting me into some classes, they're really not helping me.
Posted by Bodhisattva on December 14, 2007, at 15:32:27
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 14, 2007, at 13:39:58
Time for an old fashioned experiment.
You've seen people's behavior around you as you are normally, or at least I assume you normally shower/bathe. Anyhow, This is the control group, you've noticed things about them that have created this belief.
Now for the experiment group. I assume you see at least some of the same people everyday. Next time you are to be in their presence, eat beans. I mean just gorge yourself on the things, eat all the beans you can and anything else that just makes you disgustingly bloated. Then, go hang with your buddies. In the midst of doing whatever it is you happen to be doing, preferably in a closed space, bear down and let loose a monster of a f*rt. Go ahead man, sh*t your pants, this is for the sake of science! Then observe.
The wrinkled noses, the "OH MY GOD", the vomiting, the breaking of windows to escape. Those are very clear signs that you do not usually smell.
However, if nobody moves. Well buddy, you smell like a steaming fresh pile of dung.
I've stopped in the middle of the mall to turn to someone with particular funk and announce it to them. I assure you there are other people with the brutal honesty I've been gifted/cursed with. After that experiment you'll know with certainty that you either stink or you smell like everybody else.
On the other hand, if you're still sniffing your own arm-pits after someone looks at you funny then you'll know you're crazy.
Mostly, it sounds like you are a very thoughtful person who is attentive to the states of existence of those around you. You also have an extreme attention to detail, which is another quality to admire. Both of which can be used to surmount any endeavor you choose to pursue in life.
I hope my anecdotal experiment helps you realize that your fear originates with the desire to avoid failure in being a part of other peoples lives.
Posted by Racer on December 15, 2007, at 1:46:04
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 14, 2007, at 13:39:58
>
>
> Yeah, that's right. I'm really just after some evidence.But it doesn't sound as though you want "some evidence" -- it sounds as though you want evidence which supports your fixed belief. That's the whole point of phrase -- your belief is fixed, and it's not responding to evidence to the contrary. By your own posts, the evidence does exist -- it's just that the evidence doesn't support your belief. And your belief is fixed, because it hasn't responded to the evidence which exists.
Yes, there are things which can cause body odors, both offensive and non-offensive. What's more, people are very different in response to odors, and in their sensitivity to odors. Personally, I am moderately sensitive to the odor of others, but I find a certain level of odor more attractive than distasteful. I don't mean "haven't bathed in recorded history, and believe deodorants are poison" odor, just the normal odors of skin and hair. (In fact, my husband -- who also believes he has a problem with body odor -- is sometimes annoyed by me, because I will stick my nose into the center of his chest and just breathe in his odor. To me, it's the smell of the man I love -- and NEVER offensive.)
Here's an idea for you, when someone opens your car window: ASK your passenger why? Don't ask if it's because you smell bad, because you won't believe the answer. Ask why they've opened the window of the car. Or even ask if there's an odor in your car they find bothersome. Be prepared to hear that they just like the moving air, though -- because some of us ALWAYS have to have a car window open, or the air conditioner turned on. I can't be in a car without one or the other, without getting carsick -- and it's nothing to do with odor.
Also, do you wear strong smelling deodorant or cologne? THAT will give many people headaches.
> I do have a mental disorder. I've become paranoid and anxious and depressed because of all of this. They tell me that the 'this' exists because I'm paranoid.Is it possible for you to consider that maybe the concern about body odor really is due to a fixed, false belief associated with paranoia? Often, in order to dispel someone else's belief, you have to consider that belief -- in this case, that means carefully considering the doctor's theory that your concern about body odor is a sign of paranoia. It's possible you could find evidence to support his theory if you tried.
>
>I have a feeling that all these 'legit' doctors have a conspiracy going.Doesn't that sound a little paranoid to you?
>
> My caretakers called me this week. I returned their calls, but if they try and get in touch with me again I think I'll just let it ring. With the exception of getting me into some classes, they're really not helping me.Do you really think that's wise? You also mentioned going off your medication in another post. That sounds as though it might not be in your best interest right now.
Do you think the classes might be interesting? I'm taking some classes, and really enjoying the process -- even if the subject matter sometimes leaves me wondering why I'm doing it. It could be that taking some classes would be good for you -- for me, it gets me out of the house, it puts me in a room with other human beings, and it occupies a portion of my mind and my time. All of those are good things for me. You might find that there are benefits for you, as well.
Good luck.
Posted by TF on December 15, 2007, at 7:14:18
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of. » TF, posted by Bodhisattva on December 14, 2007, at 15:32:27
Bodhsattva: Hahahahah, I can't believe you just made me laugh. Ok, I feel a little better. Nothing's really changed but at least I'm not as depressed.
Racer, thanks for your input. I am being paranoid, and many times I guess I can be sure the signals I'm getting have nothing to do with odor, as they are circumstantial. It's just a few times when I've had a problem, where people have told me that I smell, that stick in my mind and just make me think that there's nothing I can do about my odor.
I still want to see other doctors to see if there's something that could be causing abnormally strong smells, though.
Thanks again all for the advice and stuff. It's helped.
Posted by Racer on December 15, 2007, at 10:41:09
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 15, 2007, at 7:14:18
>
>
> It's just a few times when I've had a problem, where people have told me that I smell, that stick in my mind and just make me think that there's nothing I can do about my odor.See, I live in earthquake country, and we hear a lot of people around here talking about "earthquake weather." There's this idea that certain weather patterns go with earthquakes. The reason this idea gets so strong, though, is that no one really remembers all the times that weather pattern is present and there are no earthquakes, and no one really remembers all the times there are earthquakes without that weather pattern. But when those two things coincide? THEN everyone remembers -- "See? It was Earthquake Weather!"
I think that's what you're experiencing. As soon as something "confirms" to you that you have an odor problem, it strengthens your belief. When you don't get that confirmation, or even when you get feedback that denies your belief, that's neutral, and you don't really process it. So, maybe you have Earthquake Odor? ;-)
>
> I still want to see other doctors to see if there's something that could be causing abnormally strong smells, though.
>And I think that's a good idea -- but only if you can process negative feedback about odor. If you see one doctor who says that you don't have a problem with odor, will that be enough? Or will you have to see another, to confirm that the first is an idiot? And possibly another after that?
See, I have a fixed belief, too. I generally refer to it as an irrational obsession, so you might prefer the term your doctor is using. I've talked to my therapist about getting testing to set my mind at ease, and she's against it. She says that any number of other things could come up, and it's better that we just talk about the issue involved, rather than trying to follow up with testing. It's frustrating at times, and my anxiety gets so high about it at times it's nearly unbearable, but you know what? She's right. I know she's right. I know that if I got the testing, I'd be too nervous to get through it, it would be traumatic, and the end result would be the same -- I'd still wonder and worry, "what if the tests were wrong?"
Good luck, whatever you decide to do.
Posted by rskontos on December 16, 2007, at 12:32:27
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of. » TF, posted by Racer on December 15, 2007, at 10:41:09
TF I have been reading your thread and the corresponding posters responses and you have gotten some great ones. Very thoughtful insightful and some humorous.
I have done research on this too. Because the smell disorder was interesting as well. I assume the doctors checked you for this smell disorder and concluded you did not have this right?
So in the face of not having a smell disorder they concluded it was psychological in nature is this correct?
And you still believing that you smell they concluded you have the fixed belief.
I have a VERY sensitive sense of smell. But for me it seems to be more of an artificial or man made. Perfumes will make me gag. I don't mind a man's natural smell. But I hate certain deodorants. They smell too manufacturered. I will be triggered by certain smells but love the smell of gasoline. I love the smell of fire or leaves burning. So to label things "Smell" it is a preference of each individual I believe.
So after reading all your posts and the replies I think IMHO that you are more afraid of maybe rejection of others than actually smelling. I could be wrong. But you know how you can take a fragrance and 10 people and out of those 10 people you won't find a major in that they all like the fragance or hate it. It is just preference of what is a good smell and what is bad. I love the smell of bleach it smells clean to me but to some it is overpowering. And pinesol some think is smells clean some think it is bad. So to label your particular body smell is bad well I think if we all got together some of us on babble would find you to smell good naturally and some not. European countries don't wash like us Americans we wash the natural sense of people away. Not everyone likes to do that. Some people prefer a natural body scent to a perfumed one.
I rest my case with I think you are just being very hard on yourself as alot of us on babble are because we fear people in general. I am scared to death of them and would prefer to hide. So while I understand please just go easy and relax alittle.
And let us know if you take Bodhi up on his experiment as I too laughed at that one. Take care and try to be a little kinder to yourself.
rsk
Posted by TF on December 21, 2007, at 21:49:54
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by rskontos on December 16, 2007, at 12:32:27
Alright, I feel like I'm starting to lose it again, and I'm in a mood, so I'll post here.
> I have done research on this too. Because the smell disorder was interesting as well. I assume the doctors checked you for this smell disorder and concluded you did not have this right?
>There are conditions, which could cause a person to be malodorous. I've done some research on them and such. It could be a metabolic problem, it could be my diet, it could be hygiene, it could be my sedentary lifestyle, or it could be a problem with my plumbing. It could be all of these things and/or others. When I approached my physician about this, she told me that the only thing that she knew of that could cause a person to smell bad was improper hygiene. I don't think I bothered to explain the research I did. I wasn't really coherent enough to put my thoughts to any kind of lengthy speech at the time, but I think I could do it now.
I'm not sure if my medicaid covers specialists like endocrinologists and gastro doctors. Then again, it covers psychiatrists so why not? In any case, I haven't been tested for any such disorders. They just tell me that the perpetual odor doesn't exist.
I'm sighing here when I say that maybe I'm being a little too general in my thoughts. Sometimes, I guess I might not smell. Right after I've taken a shower or whatever, I probably smell fine.
But (and I realise this is getting to be too much information) I notice when I haven't defecated in more than a day, I'll start to smell. I mean, I'll smell my own odor. It's bothersome to me, and I can only imagine what effect it has on other people. Actually, I got a sampling of that when I was hospitalized three years ago. I couldn't relax at all in the psyche ward, so I couldn't defecate. Then, I started to smell bad. I remember people complaining about the odor clinging to everything, and I heard patients in other rooms vomiting. I even heard one screaming 'I'm going to kill him!'.
> So in the face of not having a smell disorder they concluded it was psychological in nature is this correct?
>I think because I went to a psychiatrist, a bit of bias came into play, and they would naturally try to look at this from a psychiatric point of view. I stated when I started seeing my current doctor, that I think that I have a bad odor all the time. This is because sometimes when I don't smell myself, other people seem to. So I really don't know what to think, and when. I just made a very general statement, so it's understandable how the term 'fixed belief' came about. It's not necessarily false all the time, it just cannot be moved or altered.
I get mixed signals like that all the time.
A little off topic here, but I thought to mention this. Many people don't seem to like me. They always seem happy to see the end of me. I remember my coworker at an internship at an office practically lit up when I told her it was my last day. And my last therapist couldn't stop smiling as he was saying goodbye to me. I don't know, it could be anything that they don't like about me. My personality. Some people find me creepy, or stupid, or lazy, or whatever else.
> And you still believing that you smell they concluded you have the fixed belief.
>I think it's that I stated I always smell, which probably isn't true all the time. But it seems to be a lot of the time. More often than I'd like it to be, anyway. The general statement, and lack of logical explaination probably caused that term to come about, like I said.
> I have a VERY sensitive sense of smell. But for me it seems to be more of an artificial or man made. Perfumes will make me gag. I don't mind a man's natural smell. But I hate certain deodorants. They smell too manufacturered. I will be triggered by certain smells but love the smell of gasoline. I love the smell of fire or leaves burning. So to label things "Smell" it is a preference of each individual I believe.
>
I tend to shy away from scented deodorants and perfume. Usually I get worse reactions from people when I tried those things, so yeah, not an option.> So after reading all your posts and the replies I think IMHO that you are more afraid of maybe rejection of others than actually smelling. I could be wrong. But you know how you can take a fragrance and 10 people and out of those 10 people you won't find a major in that they all like the fragance or hate it. It is just preference of what is a good smell and what is bad. I love the smell of bleach it smells clean to me but to some it is overpowering. And pinesol some think is smells clean some think it is bad. So to label your particular body smell is bad well I think if we all got together some of us on babble would find you to smell good naturally and some not. European countries don't wash like us Americans we wash the natural sense of people away. Not everyone likes to do that. Some people prefer a natural body scent to a perfumed one.
>I am afraid of rejection, definitely. The fear of having a bad odor comes from that, because people generally don't like to deal with people who smell bad. And in the past, when I have smelled, I get those reactions, and it just sticks in my mind, and makes me wonder what I'm doing wrong.
> I rest my case with I think you are just being very hard on yourself as alot of us on babble are because we fear people in general. I am scared to death of them and would prefer to hide. So while I understand please just go easy and relax alittle.
>Right now I can't relax. Maybe it's something about fridays now. I don't know. A breakdown every friday.
> And let us know if you take Bodhi up on his experiment as I too laughed at that one. Take care and try to be a little kinder to yourself.
>While I appreciate the humor, there's just no way I'm going to do that.
Posted by Justherself54 on December 22, 2007, at 8:57:38
In reply to Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by TF on December 12, 2007, at 23:53:57
there are different genetic disorders that can cause body odor..one of them is Trimethylaminuria..goggle it and see if it applies..or you may have body dysmorphic disorder..this obviously is causing you a lot of pain, so I would do some searching and see if the net has something that applies to you..it may be a starting point..
Posted by TF on December 26, 2007, at 15:04:28
In reply to Re: Umm, stuff that I'm ashamed of., posted by Justherself54 on December 22, 2007, at 8:57:38
I've heard of those. I don't think I have the fish odor syndrome. I don't want to get very graphic by telling you just what I think I smell like. I don't think I'm crazy either. I trust my interpretations of what goes on around me. And, doctors don't seem to want to tell me anything. When I first approached them about this, I thought I could definitely trust them to be upfront with me. I've read about other people who experienced odor problems, a problem that they themselves could detect, and how their doctors would never admit that they had an odor. Maybe those people are crazy the exact same way I am, except with the added goodness of olfactory hallucinations, but that seems highly unlikely.
Anyways, the program got me into this course for medical transcription. Something I could do from home, starting right off when I complete it. So I don't have to leave home. I don't have to see another living soul again. Yay me.
This is the end of the thread.
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