Posted by annierose on June 29, 2006, at 22:51:41
In reply to I don't know how to be a mother to an older child, posted by Dinah on June 24, 2006, at 8:10:02
I understand the problem completly --- the part about not knowing what to do or say or not to do or not to say ....
Anyway, my T is extremely helpful for me in this way, "Why don't you tell her at bedtime that blah, blah, blah ..." and so on and so forth. I only talk with my daughter's therapist once a month at the most. She is also extremely helpful and has a different take on it. I find the two different therapists approach quite interesting (and I reflect on it quite a bit with my husband). My daughter's therapist tends to be more forgiving re: her behavior --- chalks it up to typical adolescence, my therapist wants stronger boundaries.
I'm afraid I didn't answer your question. I really like the books by Jim Faye (and he has a co-author too). I believe the book is called "Parenting with Love and Logic". I read it a few years back and my daughter's middle school recommended it last year for all incoming 6th graders.
And watch out for puberty! Boys go through it too with moods swings as well. I spent Easter vacation with my 12 year old newphew and he was no picnic, even moodier than my daughter.
Good Luck.
poster:annierose
thread:660918
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/child/20050817/msgs/662783.html