Posted by TherapyGirl on August 25, 2007, at 16:32:02
In reply to Re: Question *sex trigger*-all yous guys, posted by muffled on August 25, 2007, at 15:14:24
My T has LOTS of ideas why, Muffly. LOL She says it's all related to the abuse from my childhood -- whether sexual abuse or not. She says lots of things about the abuse coming during my formative years when I was figuring out my place in my body, in the family, in the community and in the world. And that the whole process was deeply affected by the abuse. She says for me, being on the exam table in a very vulnerable position with docs who aren't listening to me just brings up every abuse response I have in me. And because it's harder for me to dissociate now, the feelings and the fury are coming out. She has to work hard not to be pleased about the whole thing -- not because she wants this to be so hard for me, but because she considers it evidence of the work we've done together. She said our task now is to try to get the adult me to take charge of that situation and help the little me feel safe and protected. And one way to do that is to insist that the doctors listen to me and to insist they give me whatever drugs are going to help that be less torturous.
The gynecological surgery you had as a teen could very well be causing this reaction, it seems to me. Or it could be some combination of things from your childhood.
For you, I'm not sure what the process of taking back control would look like. But I'm guessing it would have to do with the adult you taking charge and being in control of the pleasurable parts and putting your i-kids to bed beforehand. It would probably also have to involve your husband letting you take the lead and being in total control. I know this is really, really hard. And I believe you are going to need a T (either the one you already trust, hint, hint, or a new one) to help you figure it out. I know I couldn't do it by myself.
I'm thinking about you, though.
poster:TherapyGirl
thread:778532
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070822/msgs/778602.html