Posted by Karen_kay on February 4, 2004, at 16:23:19
In reply to Re: Uh, oh.. This got off track! » Karen_kay, posted by pegasus on February 4, 2004, at 13:52:51
Exactly! I'd hate for my friends to know that I feel this way about them calling me all the time. See, I'm known as "The One To Call." If you need $, call me. If you need advice, call me. If you need a shoulder, call me. But I don't have anyone to call. Well, I guess that's why I have a therapist. Why doesn't everyone have a therapist???? And the thing is, my friends don't even have to ask. If they are having a rough time and talk to me about it, I go and buy them a card that day and fill it full of what they need to hear. If they mention they are having money troubles, I send money, even if it's my last dollar. I love my friends and sisters and family, but I would never mention that I'm having money troubles. Because I wouldn't want them to feel that they had to send me money. And I don't mention my problems, as they are burdened with their own.....
I just feel that at times I come across as cold because of the fact that the conversation is always one-way. Sometimes when I do talk in general terms about petty problems, I get cut off with their "huge" life crisis.... Maybe I'm a little bitter because of the things I'mgoing through and have gone through. And I feel like no one could possibly understand or have the right words to say. Or maybe I am just cold. I get the feeling my therapist thinks I am... But, he wants me to be needy. Maybe I should call him to say hello... Well, the thing with him is that I've called him in the past during a crisis (is it? I had my first flash-back and couldn't eat or sleep for a week... Is that considered a crisis?) and he didn't return my calls... Proving once again.. He couldn't be trusted. I trust him now, but I don't have a crisis. A quarter life crisis. An identity crisis. A motivation crisis. Sure, I'm having all sorts of crises, but none that warrant me to call him. I just feel a bit lonely. I'd like to talk to someone, but I don't have anything to say. Do you ever feel like that???
poster:Karen_kay
thread:308879
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040131/msgs/309418.html