Posted by sunnydays on July 14, 2007, at 11:28:00
In reply to Re: he changed his chair!!!!, posted by Honore on July 14, 2007, at 10:30:26
> I was devastated. I was so devastated esp. about the rug. It was this oatmeal shag carpet-- pretty beaten down-- but so comforting and warm. I made the whole room have character and sweetness-- a kind of innocence and darkish fuzziness. And he took it out and but in this industrial blue horror. I'm not joking about how upset I was. I felt as though he took away things that really helped me feel at home, and replaced them with cold, imperson mean things.
**** I can so see that. I got upset when he replaced his rug, but I never mentioned it to him. I think I like the new rug better now anyway.
>
> I kept talking about it until he got mad. (He gets mad more easily then most-- but I might have been getting on his nerves, because I couldn't accept the changes.) I still regret them-- and haven't ever felt that comfortable in his office. But I try to ignore the surroundings. I guess he has to do what he wants-- but I miss the old, simple kind furniture.**** I'm surprised he got mad. I would think you should be able to talk about it as much as you wanted. A change like that is a big deal.
>
> It's really shocking when you connect to the things in the environment as a stabilizing force-- as a permanent element that supports you and makes you feel-- as I said-- at home-- even when things are hard.
>**** Yeah. Just when I had everything memorized and could see it in my mind whenever I wanted, he had to go and change it!
> I'm very prone to that-- things make a big difference to my sense of presence and acceptance. So I really think it's awfully hard when a T changes chairs, or couches-- it takes away something that was a sustaining presence in ways that sometimes they don't realize.
>**** Yeah. Luckily, I think my T gets it now. And it was so sweet of him to ask if it was ok if he kept it the way it was.
sunnydays
poster:sunnydays
thread:769441
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070714/msgs/769546.html