Posted by Penny on February 3, 2004, at 12:05:00
In reply to Re: what is DBT? » Penny, posted by Karen_kay on February 3, 2004, at 11:21:48
Don't get me wrong - Dr. Phil makes many good points. BUT - he makes everything out to be easier than it really is. I mean, I've heard him say that he's not going to be able to fix someone's life in 15 minutes - but then he acts like once he says something to someone they are supposed to just be able to go "OH! THAT'S what I was doing wrong!!! WOW - thanks, Dr. Phil, for enlightening me!!!" The reality is, IMHO, that he doesn't say a thing that isn't pure common sense. Not that there's anything wrong with that - and perhaps it's the way he says it more than what he says that makes him so popular. But I'm having a real issue with him right now with the whole weight loss thing. I get O magazine (Oprah, for those who didn't know) and there was an excerpt from Dr. Phil's Ultimate Weight Solution book, and he was talking about the 'minimal effective response' to gain 'emotional closure' and my whole thing was that he didn't go into how you wouldn't necessarily know what was your 'minimal effective response' and how you can't base that on how others will react - the example he used had to do with someone confronting someone for past wrongdoing - well, that's great, but if that person hasn't changed, and you don't get the response you expect/want/need, then it's not going to be 'effective' is it? In which case, the minimal effective response doesn't work very well, or at least takes a heck of a lot longer than he would have folks believe!
I dunno - he just frustrates me. I mean, I wish I could just say "Okay, this isn't working for me" and change x, y and z. But it's not that easy. It might be simple, but it's not that easy. And I think he tends to equate simple and easy.
Of course, I'm sure I've offended all the Dr. Phil fans out there now! I could go on and on, but I won't. I just don't think he could do much for me, personally, in however much time he would spend with me on a show...
I'm sure he'd have some interesting things to say to all of us, though. He'd probably tell us to quit wallowing in our own self-pity. I heard a quote by him once where he said he stopped doing long-term therapy with clients because he was tired of hearing them whine and complain day after day. It goes back to what GG was saying about invalidating for me - that's invalidating. As though I don't have a right to whine and complain. Not that continual whining and complaining will get you anywhere, but it seems that if he was effective as a therapist he would have been able to guide his patients away from whining and complaining day after day. Just my thoughts...
sorry this is so long!!!
P
poster:Penny
thread:308679
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040131/msgs/308895.html