Posted by shrinking violet on November 27, 2004, at 20:35:50
In reply to Re: Dilemma....PLEASE help, posted by QuietHeart on November 26, 2004, at 22:13:35
Hi Quiet Heart; thank you for your response.
Actually, when I started again with my T a couple of weeks ago I brought in a list of reasons why I was there and some specific things I wanted to work on. But for some reason I've been "unraveling" emotionally lately and I feel like the things in the list are the least of my concerns right now. I'm not really sure what is going on with me, but at first I thought to myself that if it were the therapy making me feel this badly, then I should be able to pick out some specific issues or things that made me feel this way, and I can't. Actually, my T and I never really get to discuss anything "deep" in-depth; the hour goes by too fast and I am hesitant to bring up anything really deep or hurtful, so the past couple of sessions we've talked about a few general topics but nothing that should have caused me to have this kind of a meltdown this soon. I really just think it's a convergence of a lot of changes going on for me right now, coupled with a lot of past hurts that haven't been worked through, as well as some current pressing issues like an eating disorder, etc. I've been too good at pushing everything down...well, now I think the pressure is starting to build, like in a volcano, and maybe it's all starting to erupt. I wanted to try to address this with my T when she called today, but, let's just say I had a really bad day and by the time she called I was too much of a mess and too exhausted from crying to feel like talking much. I'll see what happens the next time I speak to her or see her.
Thanks for your input, I appreciate it. Take care.
SV
>> It seems your core concern is whether therapy is really helpig you and whether it CAN indeed help you. This is a complex question and it's absolutely ok to be confused about it. Maybe you can start with trusting yourself and your instincts more. Sit down and make a list (even if it's a free-associating list) of goals you have for your own self development, and problems you have that you feel need fixing. They can be big or small, the important thing is that they matter to you. next, when u see your T, start by outlining some of the issues you seem to work on. everything eventualy converges, but this will make u feel more in control. generally voicing these concerns to your T could also help. hang in there, we're here for you!
poster:shrinking violet
thread:420644
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041123/msgs/421089.html