Posted by Dory on August 30, 2007, at 23:41:23
In reply to muffled, you online now? chat? (nm) » muffled, posted by Dory on August 30, 2007, at 23:02:31
i just left him and message and told him it was hard to call, but that i was upset... not because he hadn't called me, but because he changed the rules and i didn't know what was ok... how would i know what he would do in the future if he could just change the rules?
i said i knew he might not get the message because of the holiday weekend, and he works at a pain management center on Fridays. If he is there he does sometimes have the time to check in with his office. i have no way to know if he'll get the message before Tuesday.
i thought leaving a message would give me some relief but since i made the call my anxiety level is rising. i'm afraid of having made it worse. i am afraid he'll listen to the message and be even more irritated with me... or think i am so hopelessly anxious and helpless that he can't help me... i am afraid he will be disappointed in me. i am afraid he will feel like he needs to pull back, that maybe working more in a "supportive vs cognitive" role was not helpful for me.
i keep trying to focus on what he said when i left on Monday... he said he wasn't going anywhere and he wasn't going to ditch me.
i think i am going to sedate myself now...
poster:Dory
thread:779336
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070822/msgs/779875.html